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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to feel a bit annoyed about this

8 replies

Jux · 14/05/2010 09:57

We got a call in the morning yesterday from a friend saying she was having huge problems with her dp and could she and her young (3) daughter come and stay the night at our place to give herself and her dp some space away from each other. No problem. They arrived about 4 o'clock, and my dd(10) took her dd off to play while friend, dh and I sat about while friend expanded on her woes.

I cooked supper, I sorted bath times etc. and ran about making sure kids and friend were fine etc.

Once kids were both in bed, we got the wine out. I'm not much of a drinker, nor do I socialise much in the evenings, so this was a bit of a special occasion for me. We were having a laugh and talking about life the universe and everything, and eventually we went into the sitting room, where the kids had left the tv on and Question Time was just starting. Friend had just got a text from someone and was replying to it, so we left the tv on quietly as dh and I both wanted to watch QT, but we would have switched it off as soon as friend had finished with her phone. Well, she got completely stuck into this 'text conversation', and was bursting out laughing in response to the replies she was getting, and as she spelled out her own responses etc. Jolly good, she was having a laugh.

Then she looked up, said "Oh can't you switch off this horrible boring politics stuff and put some music on?" and went back to her texting. We switched off the tv and dh chose a cd and put it on. We sat listening, for at least another 15 mins while she busied herself with her text conversation.

I gave up and went to bed.

I thought she was being bloody rude, both for ignoring us whilst she carried on with this text conversation (must have gone on for at least half an hour), but also for complaining about the tv when she wasn't attending to either that or the cd dh put on for her. I mean, we could have carried on watching what we wanted to watch - it didn't make a blind bit of difference to her.

Or am I an old fogey, and this is what people do nowadays?

OP posts:
sungirltan · 14/05/2010 10:06

yanbu - texting is bloody anti social. but maybe she wasn't thinking - being a bit stressed with things.

on the whole though yanbu

HarderToKidnap · 14/05/2010 10:08

I don't really know what people do nowadays, but WHY did you turn the telly off?

You wanted to watch it. You could see she was texting. Don't behave like a doormat and then complain about it, I don't understand that.

So yes, she was rude and you were lovely to take her in that night. But also, stand up for yourself. You don't have to blindly do what other people ask!

paisleyleaf · 14/05/2010 10:20

yanbu at all.

fyimate · 14/05/2010 12:59

That was rude of her.
I dont know how people are nowadays because I'm not much of a socialiser, none of my mates have any kids so we dont connect on the same level but even if one of my mates did that I'd have said something....maybe she doesnt realise how rude she was?
I see why you didnt say anything though, awkward huh.
But like they say, dont ask, dont get.

ConnorTraceptive · 14/05/2010 13:10

She was rude but kind of agree with Harder you shouldn't have turned it off

Bathsheba · 14/05/2010 13:18

She doesn't exactly sound devastated at having to leaver her DH for the night for space..!

I'd have assumed that someone would have needed to land on someone else's doorstep at short notice because of some breakdown or near breakdown in their relationship....if I'd taken her and her DD in on that basis I'd not expect her to sit giggling at text messages all night

Mouseface · 14/05/2010 13:29

Agree with Bathsheba.

I would've been tempted to say: 'We'll put some music on one you've finished being an anti-social bint........'

However, it would've come out as, 'Yeah, sure....what do you want to listen to?'

I'm rubbish.

Jux · 14/05/2010 15:17

That's exactly how it was Mouseface!

I didn't really mind her doing all the texting until we'd turned the tv off and been left twiddling our thumbs. Apparently, later, she brought out some coke as well, so I'm glad I had gone off to bed.

She is a close friend, almost family really, but sometimes I think she's just a spoilt little bitch.

And no, not too worried about her relationship either.

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