Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not tell ds he has been invited to a party so i dont have to take him?

18 replies

2anddone · 05/05/2010 15:53

ds had an invite left through his preschool door today from a child that went to 'big school' in september. Usually i am quite happy to take him to parties and play dates but this is the first one he has been invited to on a weekday school night. The party will be finished by 6 but my ds goes to bed at 6 and there is no way i could get him home awake. Also his sister goes to bed then and as she hasnt been invited as she only 1 i would have to sort babysitter out for her. Like i say i would usually let him go to every party he is invited to and in the past have even changed family plans so he can go to them. I wonder aibu to tell the mum we cant make the party and not say anything to ds as he doesnt even realise he got an invite today or do i bite the bullet sort a sitter and hope i can get him back from the party awake wwyd?.

OP posts:
SloanyPony · 05/05/2010 15:56

As long as he's not of the age where other children might tell him or be talking about it or where he might think, through conversations with others, that he's not invited.

redrobin · 05/05/2010 15:56

dont go! he'll get loads more invitations when he's old enough to enjoy it. he'll just be tired and grumpy, and you'll be stressed.

MrsYamada · 05/05/2010 15:58

nah, skip it. Unless someone tells him about it.

colditz · 05/05/2010 16:01

Six! Bloody hell, your children go to bed at tea time!

YANBU, You can do as you please with your children but seriously, you might want to think a bit harder about the silly bedtime because it's going to seriously impact on any activities he might want to do after school if he always has to be home for half past five.

rubyslippers · 05/05/2010 16:02

how old is he?

i would take him - one late night won't hurt him unless he really wouldn't stay awake that long

Original poster
2anddone · 05/05/2010 16:05

i say 6 thats what time they have bath he is only 4 and has always gone to bed that early its not me he gets really tired out by end of day and puts himself to bed. We do most of his activities on the weekend. As i said he only 4 and only him and one other child had an invite today so if we dont go cant see how he will find out

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 05/05/2010 16:07

i really think that at 4 years old he could go to a party and go to bed at 6.30 pm

he may fall asleep on the way home, so you just strip him and put his PJs on

we do this with DS all the time and he is just coming up to 4 years old

alarkaspree · 05/05/2010 16:08

No, not unreasonable. Your ds won't care.

However I'd expect that there will be a lot of uninvited siblings at that party, or that not many people will attend. The boy's mother may be happy to invite your dd if that's your main issue.

colditz · 05/05/2010 16:12

I still think half an hour won't make any difference. I'd take him to the party, but I'm biased because ds1 hasn't been to a party since he was 4 and he's now 7.

Maybe if every week was a social whirl, I'd feel differently

OtterInaSkoda · 05/05/2010 16:22

Sorry, I think YABU.

If he falls asleep on the way home, so be it. If he has to skip a bath, so be it. It's a shame for a DC to miss out on the odd party because bedtime is set in stone (even if it's the DC that are so rigid rather than their parents, iyswim)

Why do you need to arrange a babysitter for your dd? Talk to the other dc's mother - she might be happy for you to bring her.

biddysmama · 05/05/2010 16:23

lol colditz.. thats when we are eating our tea as well... my friends kids go to bed at 6.30, bed time routine for my 13 month old starts at 8

but dp doesnt get home till 6 (leaves home at 4.30am) so if we didnt then he wouldnt see them

Kewcumber · 05/05/2010 16:25

Blimey, 6pm , what on earth time does he get up?

Trafficcone · 05/05/2010 16:25

My kids had a 5:30 bedtime at that age but I'd have taken DS. I would have asked a neighbour to sit wth dd while I collected him though. I'd not stay at the party at age 4 though, definite drop and run.

Kewcumber · 05/05/2010 16:26

my four year old goes to bed at 7.30pm (asleep around 8pm) and gets up around 6.30-7.30am. Isn't that fairly normal?

Sorry not really the point I know

compo · 05/05/2010 16:35

We sometimes start bath bed and stories at 6pm if it's been a desperate day
they still don't go to bed til 7pm and then fall asleep roundabout 7.30pm
so if we started all that at 7pm they'd oversleep for school , lol
but big pita to have to get a sitter I'd take the one yr old, you can take some food for her to keep her going

Original poster
2anddone · 05/05/2010 16:36

he has always had at least 12 hours since 8 weeks old he gets up about 7.15 next day. Fwiw his sister has only just started sleeping through at 18 months!

OP posts:
colditz · 05/05/2010 16:38

Well - you know him better than we do.

junglist1 · 05/05/2010 16:38

I think if you don't want to, don't go but I'd be more flexible with the bedtime TBH

New posts on this thread. Refresh page