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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or is my sister??

36 replies

mumbar · 03/05/2010 19:58

Ok I'm fairly new to MN but am prepared for the truth.

Yesterday there was a family party with family (which is large) and hosts friends. Most of family sat in lounge and rest went to dining room etc. Sat chatting and me and aunt both began laughing that we needed the loo but daren't move as we may lose our seats!. About 2 minutes later DS ran in from garden saying he needed loo and went upstairs. After about a minute I thought I'd better go and see he was ok and go myself. My cousin next to me joked he would save my seat by putting his feet up.

When upstairs I knocked on bathroom door and asked DS if he was ok. My sister opened the door and snapped at me he was fine as she was helping him. OK he's 5 and can go alone but I didn't say a word. Next DS gets it out starts to go when my sister asks him a question. Of course he turns round to answer and it goes everywhere. She shouted at him 'look what you've just done your not even looking at what you are doing'. DS finishes and comes out of tiolet straight away and gives me a hug and actually looked quite worried. I said to him have you forgotten something and he replied ' oh yes wash my hands'. At the same time sister opens door and snaps at him ' you haven't even washed your hands and you should be doing this' indicating at the tissue shes using to wipe the seat.

Ds looks worrying at me agin but I just tell him to go and play in garedn.

Fastforward 5 minutes I've been and go downstairs. My sister is sat on the poffy I was on. She was going early as had another function to attend and I knew she was going in a few minutes. I joked to my cousin ' well your chair saving skills are rubbish'. My sister knew nothing of this conversation but asked what I meant. Laughing I said Cousin was going to save seat for me but it was only a laugh and anyway as she was leaviung in a bit I would sit down then, no problem'. People chatted and after about 2 minutes I said ' actually I think I could prob perch on edge here if you don't mind moving across a bit.

Whoops she just looked at me and said why should she share and no she would not. My mum then began making comments like going then girls share I dare you etc. I just stood there shocked and mortified feeling like a kid. My sister was adament she was not going to shar.

DS then comes in from garden is a bit tired and asks for a hug. I give him one. He asks to sit on my lap and I say when I sit down of course he can and to play for a bit. Ds points to room on poffy and says can't you sit there, Sister says no shes not sharing and DS tells her she should share as theres room. Sis says no but he can sit with her. He says why doesn't mummy sit with her and him on my lap and we can all share. (Bless!!). Sister says no and tells him apologise for being rude to her. DS looks at me upset so I suggest he goes and plays again for a bit.

My sister than says if he doesn't apologise she won't go to his class assembly next week. (I can't go as I am working).

DS looks at me I tell him and go play and doorbell goes which is taxi for sister and she leaves.

Sorry it;s so long but I wanted to know AIBU not to make him apologise (Iwould if I thought he was being rude) and/or is my SIS BU to make such a threat?

OP posts:
iwastooearlytobeayummymummy · 03/05/2010 21:38

If I really want to wind up my dds (18 and 21)when they fall out I remind them that they are the most genetically alike people in the world, and as I brought them up likely to have similar outlooks too!

My sister has an infinite capacity to infuriate and delight, but God forbid anyone else does anything to harm her!

'spect you feel the same too

junkcollector · 03/05/2010 21:47

Maybe she's pregnant.

mumbar · 03/05/2010 22:02

yes I do

tbh when shes around and ds is being a monkey I have taken to going with him to another room to reprimand him as she usually tells me to leave him alone!

I do this as I like to try and avoid any confrontation as I don't find it helpful, necessary or very adult and tbh when theres 20 or so other family members around quite embarassing.

think perhaps I'll forgo mentioning we are genetically alike etc not sure how she'd take this!!

OP posts:
outnumbered2to1 · 03/05/2010 23:54

your sister is 27 going on 5. tell her to fucking grow up

GeekOfTheWeek · 04/05/2010 09:22

Your sis is a knob.

I have a strong personality but don't treat people like that. Especially my sister.

mistletoekisses · 04/05/2010 09:31

YANBU

Your sis is a witch. I have a strong personality, but wouldn't dream of being so mean to my nephew. And I am sorry, but that behaviour is plain mean.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 04/05/2010 09:38

She needs to be told to stop this emotional blackmail right now! Telling your son (or you in front of your son) that he can't have a sleepover or she won't come to his assembly if he doesn't comply with her demands/orders is horribly manipulative, and will NOT make for a healthy relationship between them.

nancydrewrocks · 04/05/2010 09:59

You're both mad.

If there was space to sit down on the "poffy" why didn't you just sit down?

seeker · 04/05/2010 10:08

As my late lamented Grandma in law would have said "Six and two threes, love, six and two threes"

Greensleeves · 04/05/2010 10:12

I don't know why people always feel compelled to say "six of one and half a dozen of the other" when it clearly isn't

Your sister was being a selfish cow. There was no good reason for her to be so nasty to you or your ds. If she is worth her salt, she will calm down and apologise.

If she doesn't, I would steer clear of her for a while personally.

shimmerygoldglitter · 04/05/2010 10:17

Er I think she sounds like a right cow.

Alright the sitting down thing can be let go. But no-one, family member or not would tell my child off like that and make him worried and anxious. And the I wont come to your assembly or have you to sleep over thing is just nasty. 5 year olds get very upset by this kind of thing, they don't understand that it is not that important. It is mean imvho.

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