A bit of history: Ex-h met someone 18 months or so ago. They moved in together very quickly. I had some misgivings as he had "previous" for treating ds (now aged 8) pretty shoddily when there was a woman on the scene. However, I got on with it, his life etc etc bought flowers for ds to give her the first weekend he stayed with the pair of them, invited her to come in for a cup of tea, was very friendly etc. I have always tried to be amicable with ex-h for our son's sake.
Last November I wound up in hospital. Very frightening, it turns out I have an auto-immune disease. I was on hefty doses of steroids after I came out, put on weight and my face puffed up like a moomin! I felt like shit. She went part-time at work and took to coming with ex-h and coming in every time he collected/dropped off ds. It was all getting a bit much and after one particular evening, when she queried whether ds would be warm enough and also gushed about how she had gone part-time at work because it was "so much better" for her (note I work full-time, am deputy head of a primary school and work like a dog!), I thought "Do you know what, I don't need this stress." I was feeling pretty bad and politely requested that he did not bring her in every single bloody time he came to collect/drop ds. I explained that I was not well and it was making me uncomfortable (in my own home!). I also stated that if they were on their way to/back from somewhere of course she could come in, I just didn't see the necessity for her to come in all the time. His attitude was that I was being completely unreasonable and that he would also stop coming in. OK fine, that's his choice.
Fast forward: DS said on Friday that his wii wasn't working. I had a look at it, seems dead as a dodo. I texted ex-h yesterday and asked if he could look at it when he came to collect ds today. He texted back and told me to box it up. I thought it would be better if he could look at it in situ in case it was something I'd missed and texted him to this effect.
This morning I had a text from her (from his phone, we have never exchanged numbers) saying I am trying to manipulate both of them and I made the rules saying she and he couldn't come in and that I "shud box up that wii and mind your life" (English isn't her first language). I am seething. I let DS go to his dad's today anyway even though my gut instinct is that I don't want him near that horrible woman. Ex-h says I have created the situation by saying she couldn't come in. He claims he did not know she had sent the text. Have I been unreasonable? I'm sorry this is so long and thank you if you have read this far! I would just really appreciate some perspective.