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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to feel like crying over this stupidly trivial thing?

48 replies

LittleSilver · 30/04/2010 19:30

My fabulous manager is leaving . She has been an absolute bedrock to me and I was gutted when she handed in her notice, two weeks ago.

It's her leaving do tonight and I booked babysitter and told DH. He was very meh about the whole thing, mainly I think because it's being held in a nightbluc (but at 8pm, come on, it's not going to be heaving with drunken 18 year olds then), but agreed to come. Note: we haven't had a night out in five months (New Year). And it wasn't even going to be a "night out", rather just pop along for a few drinks and leave around ten-ish. Plus our support worker was going to be playing and I thought it would be nice to sort of cheer him along.

Well, DH has been held up at work, and won't be home til 830. He then says he'll need to shower etc and won't be able to leave til 9, we'll get there at 930 and "it'll be full of drunken idiots". He obviously doesn't want to go, I said as much (not in a losing temper sort of way) and he hung up on me.

So I've sent the babysitter home. I'm just upset because:

a. I wanted to say goodbye.
b. I feel he could have just put up with it,just for an hour. I never get to go out (well, like I said, last time was five months ago). So stupid, I booked the babysitter 90 mins early so I could have a bath, facemask etc without 3 children in my hair. I even went out and bought facemask and stuff just to do a bit of a pamper with as well. I miss going out. Not that much, but pre-children I had a really good social life and would quite like to do it every now and again, iyswim.
c. I wanted my colleagues to meet him. And vice versa.

I do believe he's been genuinely held up. Just disappointed I guess. Oh yes, and he's got his friends (a couple) coming to stay all w/end, so I get to run around, cook and play hostess (which I don't mind, I like them) for his friends, but he won't even go out for an hour or so for me.

Rant over. Sorry for the essay. Thanks for listening.

OP posts:
Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 30/04/2010 19:31

Couldn't you have fone without him

Hullygully · 30/04/2010 19:31

I don't understand why you aren't going anyway? That is a TERRIBLE mistake. Up to him if he doesn't, but you should have stuck with your plan.

runnybottom · 30/04/2010 19:32

Why didn't you go without him?

LaurieFairyCake · 30/04/2010 19:32

I think you should go.

You're not joined at the hip. He's being a bit of an arse as he's not acknowledging how important it is to you.

And don't run around playing hostess - let him do it.

diddl · 30/04/2010 19:33

I would have gone anyway tbh.

LisaD1 · 30/04/2010 19:33

Well, why don't you put the kids to bed and then get yourself ready and when your DH comes home he can stay in with the kids and you can go and say goodbye?

Reality · 30/04/2010 19:34

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LisaD1 · 30/04/2010 19:34

Oops, x-posted with lots of other like minded women!

Reality · 30/04/2010 19:34

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compo · 30/04/2010 19:35

Yabu not to have gone on your own

spybear · 30/04/2010 19:35

Liitlesilver- I hate it when im looking forward to something and it is ruined.

Poor thing, you can still pamper yourself when Dc's go to bed.

Or make sure your eyes are puffy and red for when DH comes in, so it looks like you've been crying and he feels9hopefully0 super guilty,

mumbar · 30/04/2010 19:35

call babysitter back get your glad rags on and get out!!!!!

Oh and enjoy it!!!!

thisisyesterday · 30/04/2010 19:35

yes, i agree, i'd have just gone by myself!

and why do you have to run around after his friends? is he incapable of doing so himself?

florence2511 · 30/04/2010 19:36

Yes. I'm with everyone else here. Go without him. If he doesn't want to go then he doesn't have to but why should that mean you shouldn't go??

Go out and have fun.

winnybella · 30/04/2010 19:36

I'm perplexed- why wouldn't you go be yourself?

winnybella · 30/04/2010 19:37
  • be
FabIsGoingToGetFit · 30/04/2010 19:37

You shouldn't have asked him to go once it was clear he didn't want too and now you should be going alone and let him stay at homes with the kids.

Ladyanonymous · 30/04/2010 19:37

Go go go go go go GO!!!!!

piscesmoon · 30/04/2010 19:38

Get the babysitter back and go!

warthog · 30/04/2010 19:38

FGS phone the baby-sitter back and GO ANYWAY.

stop being a martyr.

bobdog · 30/04/2010 19:42

Get all dressed up anyway. Look absolutely fantastic reclined upon your sofa.

ScreaminEagle · 30/04/2010 19:46

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ConnorTraceptive · 30/04/2010 19:46

Sorry but i think it was a bit silly to send the baby sitter home. You should have just said to your dh "ok well I'm going to go so can you pay the sitter when you get home"

Honestly there was no reason for you to miss out tonight

ConnorTraceptive · 30/04/2010 19:47

Am unreasonably cross with you actually which is probably a sign that I should turn off PC

TeamEdward · 30/04/2010 19:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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