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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to laugh when people say dd looks more like her daddy

27 replies

biddysmama · 30/04/2010 12:25

since he isnt biologically

happens all the time! she looks just like ds really, who looks just like me

OP posts:
instructionstothedouble · 30/04/2010 12:28

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WinkyWinkola · 30/04/2010 12:32

People definitely see what they want to see or perhaps one particular parent's face is more familiar to them so they simply see that more. My pil are obsessed with my dcs looking like dh. They don't unfortunately for them.

TeaOneSugar · 30/04/2010 12:39

My pil are desparate to see DH in DD, but she is the image of me .

She unfortunately is exactly like DH in every other respect.

pud1 · 30/04/2010 12:39

people say it to my fil. he has had loads of comments that dd look like him. they are not blood related and i think he takes great delight in pointing this out

JaneS · 30/04/2010 12:48

Aww, your DH must be pleased.

I think expressions can make people look very alike. One of the kids I used to babysit had a way of tilting her head and looking at you that was exactly like her mum, though when she was asleep you realized they didn't actually look alike at all.

thegirlwithsomethingextra · 30/04/2010 12:48

Yes people always used to say that my nephew looked just like my BIL. And my BIL isn't his biological father either.

My BIL and my nephew's biological dad did look similar though - I guess my sister has a certain 'type' when it comes to men

Downdog · 30/04/2010 12:55

it's fantastic - I've been out with my bald white blondish gay friend to be told several times that my daughter looks just like him. Her Dad is Black British!

It's really funny - people are just being nice & well intended. Something to laugh about indeed.

Tawny75 · 30/04/2010 13:00

Not at all, I am constantly told how much like my OH my DD is and she is not biologically his. I think the fact that he has been her daddy for over half her life means she picks up his idiosyncrasies and it is those that people see as similar.

Seabright · 30/04/2010 13:03

I just get told how much my DD doesn't look like me. Which was a bit weird to begin with, but I think it's funny now.

MmeLindt · 30/04/2010 13:06

DS does not look like DH but sometimes he says or does something that reminds me so much of my DH. It is more a gesture or a look than anything else.

Do you say anything, or just thank them and move on?

MmeLindt · 30/04/2010 13:08

We have friends who adopted a little girl from China, their DD is very obviously ethnic Chinese. They have been told that she is very like her mother. (White American).

AmeliaCordelia · 30/04/2010 13:13

At a school party Dh was talking to DS1. One of the mums came up to me and said:

"Doesn't your DS look like his dad?"

"Please tell me that's your husband he's with"

ChocHobNob · 30/04/2010 13:16

That happened with me growing up too. Me and my sister have different biological fathers, but are both redheads and looked very alike. People always commented on us looking like "Dad" lol

ChocHobNob · 30/04/2010 13:17

Even more so now when people comment on how much my children look like their "Grandad" I just smile and chuckle to myself.

bran · 30/04/2010 13:18

People are always saying how much DS looks like DH or how much DD looks like me and they're both adopted. I usually just smile and say "a lot of people have said that." It does make me though as I can't see it myself, especially any likeness between carribean/asian/white DD and me (celtic).

gingertoo · 30/04/2010 13:22

Ha ha - this happens to me alot. I have a blonde friend who has a gorgeous redheaded daughter. When we are out together people assume that she is mine, due to my ginger hair, and say how like me she is...

RustyBear · 30/04/2010 13:24

I had a friend who had two adopted boys who didn't look anything like her. When people said 'Oh, they don't look like you, do they take after their dad?' she took great delight in replying 'I don't know' without further explanation....

mummytime · 30/04/2010 13:30

I knew a Dad at Toddler group once who did look just like his little boy, but he was a Foster Dad. I think if you see people together you see the likeness you expect.
Actually have you ever been freaked by how alike some married couples look? I knew one who I would have assumed were brother and sister if I hadn't known.

lazarusb · 30/04/2010 14:29

People think it's weird that my children look more like my brother than his own do! I don't get offended though, I find it quite amusing...and it irritates my MIL like hell!

BramblyHedge · 30/04/2010 14:44

Someone a few years back said I look just like my 'mum' when they met me for the first time.

I so wanted to point out that not only was she my stepmum, she was also only 13 years older than me and very obviously a completely different race to me (she is black, I am white). I think some people just use it for small talk without thinking about it properly.

heading4home · 30/04/2010 14:47

Oh people used to say I look so much like my Dad....made my parents laugh because they adopted me!

Reality · 30/04/2010 14:48

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RustyBear · 30/04/2010 16:27

When people see DS with his two cousins (my sister's boys) they always think it's DS & DN1 who are brothers, DS looks much more like DN1 than DN2 does.

4andnotout · 30/04/2010 16:34

Everyone says dd1 looks just like dp and it's true she does, they are fair haired, pale skinned, blue eyes and wear glasses and I'm dark haired, darker skin tone, yet I'm the one biologically related to her To be fair none of the dd's look like me, dd3 however is the spitting image of my dsis as a child and has a lot of her characteristics too.

Lancelottie · 30/04/2010 16:41

One of my nieces' friends actually ARGUED with me about my parentage of my own daughter. Friend had only met daughter when we were with her cousins and had assumed she was their little sister. She got quite cross with me about it: 'But she doesn't look anything like you, she looks like Exxx and Rxxx' (which she does, very, being jolly, freckly and ginger).

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