We have a 13 week old DD3.
DH has a DB and SIL who, over the years have grown apart - there has never been any argument or anything, just over time our lives have gone different ways.
In the past we have always bought birthday presents and Christmas presents for their sons up until they were 18. Sometimes in the past they have been quite rude (issuing us with lists or Argos product numbers, the Dnephews phoning us us to check we had the "right" Man Utd top, saying things like "I want a playstation game - its no more than you spent on us last year", never saying Thank You for presents even when we are in the room as they open them). We stopped with birthday presents when the DNephews were 18 and the individual Christmas presents around the same time although we still send the family "something" - this year it was a large tin of Roses.
Over the years DH used to be very close to them - he worked in the same town when the boys were younger and used to go round every day for his lunch etc. He spent many many hours/days fixing their computers and things so the boys would have a computer to play on - he was stunningly patient every single time they broke it by loading trial and pirated games on it - often making a 80 mile round trip to physically fix it when no-one could follow his instructions over the phone.
Since we had DD1 our relationship with them has gradually faded - they bought a new computer so didn't need DH to fix it, had new hobbies that took up a lot of their time, The boys grew older, got girlfriends and jobs and bands, so we very very rarely see them.
DD1 (now 6) received a present when she was born, and for a couple of birthdays and Christmases. DD2 (now 3) received a "birth" present and Christmas present but I don't think she ever received any birthday presents. (I'm not keeping track on a list or anything but I always send Thank You cards for all presents so I am aware of who needs to receive a Thank You card and who doesn't).
Now, DD3 was born in the middle of January. BIL and SIL received the same formal birth announcement card with a photo that everyone else did. They also received one of the Newborn Hospital photos that we sent copies of to close family. They have also seen my MIL numerous times since DD3 was born (MIL lives nearer to them that we do) so there is absolutely no way on earth they do not know that they have a new neice/that DH and I have had another baby.
We have received nothing from them, not even a card never mind a present.
Now, I know its generally bad form to "expect" a present, but AIBU in reality to be upset that we haven't even received a card, never mind a present for DD3's birth. We keep all our baby cards in the girls' baby boxes and, in future, it will be really obvious that there isn't a card from DH's DB and SIL, never mind DNephews/The girls' cousins. Neither DH or I have large families - both 1 sibling each, and there is only 1 cousin on my family's side and these 2 on DH's family's side.
Like I say, there has been no argument, no falling out, just a gradual growing apart as everyone's lives have moved on, and their boys have grown bigger, but they do only live 40 miles away in a town with shops.
I don't even really want a present - as they don't know us I'm sure they would send an Argos voucher as that has often been the Christmas presents we have received, and we don't need anything, but I guess its the principle - we have cards from people I see in passing at church and women from DD1's playgroud, but nothing from DD3's Aunt, Uncle or 2 cousins.
So AIBU to be narked about this (but just silently seethe and do nothing) or is it very "grabby" of me and therefore I am being Unreasonable by expecting cards and presents.