To be a little bit miffed that our next door neighbours haven't told us that they interrupted an intruder?

[Rollergirl1]

Had a knock on the door Saturday afternoon, twas the local CID informing us that our next door neighbours had interrupted an intruder in their back garden at 3am last monday morning. They wanted to know if we'd heard anything but also to fore-warn us to be extra vigilant locking doors and closing windowson the ground floor, etc. Since then both DH and I have been on red-alert throughout the night and hyper-sensitive to the quietest of noises.

Am just a little bit miffed that our next door neighbours didn't think to come and tell us themselves that this had happened. We get on with them quite well, we have two young DC's and there is only a fence seperating our gardens, which is easily scaleable. I realise that they obviously have a lot on their plates but just thought it would have been neigbourly for them to tell us about it. Also they have since installed a very bright security camera (which kind of shines in to our bedroom a bit) so they are obviously suitably concerned about it.

I meant security light, not camera.

YADNBU

That is a bit weird to be honest.
I wonder why they didn't tell you...

And if police asked me on Saturday what I did last Monday I would not be able to tell them anything at all. Why the delay?

Perhaps it simply didn't cross their minds to tell you. Have you actually seen or spoken to them since it happened?

They are probably a bit stressed and upset. The world really doesn't revolve around you (not to be mean but just they will be wound up by their own problems).

Condensedmilk: I know, I wondered what the delay was too.

Bibbitybobbityhad: No haven't seen them since. I am sure it hasn't crossed their minds to tell us, I am not suggesting they haven't told us out of spite. But my point is why didn't it cross their minds. If it had happened to us I would have been over to them like a shot as I would think it was my duty to let them know about a potentially dangerous situation.

Perhaps the police told them they would let you know?

I don't think it would have occurred to me to tell you either. I get on OK with my neighbours but just to say good morning and have a quick chat. If something of that sort happened I'd not think of telling them - now you mention it would make sense to do so. If it happens (touch wood it doesn't) I shall make a point of doing so!

I know this post makes it sound like I think the world revolves around me. I really don't and I totally understand that they must be stressed and freaked out about it.

Six months ago someone tried to force my front door open at 11,30pm. Very scary experience and the next morning I told my neighbours about it. Just seems the normal, considerate thing to do.

I don't think this post makes you sound like you think it's all about you, Rollergirl.

My neighbour three doors down went to all the houses in our terrace after they experienced a break in. She was particularly kind to tell me because her house was burgled while she was on the afternoon school-run and the police suggested to her that the intruder might know her routine and knew that the house would be empty between 3 and and half 3.

It is the business of your nearest neighbours to know if your house has been broken into, as that fact demonstrates that there have been, and therefore could be again, criminals operating in your area and your home may be at risk.

Our next door neighbour in our first house once left her back door open and we didn't know if it was a break-in or just absent-mindedness, but when it got late and dark (and cold!) we called the police and they went in to check and secured the property. DH and I had a long debate about whether we should go next door and tell the neighbour that we'd called the police as it seemed so dramatic, but eventually we did as we were effectively responsible for the police officer climbing her wall and wandering around her house. But we did wonder whether it was necessary to make a point of going round to tell her. So it may just be that your neighbours planned to mention it in passing if they saw you, or maybe they have knocked while you were out or something? YABU to assume that they just aren't bothered about your security - they may be dithering, they may think the police have told you, they may have called while you were out etc etc....