to think 2 10 year old and 1 9 year old girls should not be left alone in the house

[SlartyBartFast]

dd went to play with a friend, and it transpired initially they were to babysit the 3 year old. then plans were changed and the 3 year old went out with mum and dad.
leaving 2 10 year olds and 1 9 year old alone?
in myh book this is wrong. i just spluttered, but you are not old enough to babysit.

mum and dad were gone a long time according to dd. so we are none the wiser.

what can i do?

she ran home to tell me, but i was on my way out and said no.

So she was withing running home distance? Then of course ti was OK for them to be on their own!

It's fine to leave 2 10 yr olds a a 9 yr old in a house, I'd say. But if one of them was your child and you knew nothing about it, I wouldn't be happy. You should have been asked if you were happy with that.

I agree that there are 2 questions here.
Is it okay for 9, 10 year olds to be left alone? Yes, as long as they are not complete muppets and now where help/ an adult are
Are they able to babysit a 3yr old?
I did at this age, but can understand if people think it is not on.

Iwould just tell them youaren'thappy your dd being without parental supervision + leave it at that.

Oh dear, I am in the YABU camp.
What seeker said, really.
But it really depends how long they were left for, and what time of day it was. And how far away they were from you (which sounds very close by?)

And no way should they be 'responsible' for a 3yo longer than 3-4 minutes (long enough to borrow a cup of sugar and chat briefly).

I've left my 3 older children alone at home from age 9-10 onwards for short periods. However if the question ever arises whether it's ok for someone els's child to be left without adult supervision, i ALWAYS run it by the parents.

Dd is now 11 and some of her friends' parents are ok with the girls being left together for short periods, eg to collect a younger sibling, and some aren't. But we talk about it !

And I'd never leave dd in charge of her 6 year old brother, never mind expect someone else's child to be responsible too.

I wouldn't do it with someone else's DCs because the parent may not like it-as seen on here.
I don't see anything wrong with it-depending on the DC.
I certainly left my 11yr old looking after his 3 yr old brother, if I was within running distance of the house and he knew where I was.
Children act according to expectations-if you treat them as if they are totally irresponsible, that is what you will get.

Agree with others that the issue is not about leaving a 9yo and a 10yo at home, but about making a decision about somebody else's child.

Personally, I have absolutely no qualms about leaving my own 9yo at home for hours on end; he is a sensible boy and would know what to do in an emergency. But he can't have his friends round, because we don't know what their parents would think. And their parents have the right to decide about them.

And leaving them with a 3yo definitely a bad idea.

Agree with children living up to expectations. Can't help noticing that my Swedish nephews and nieces- who all have had a lot of responsibility from an early age, because that is the way things are still done there- seem a lot more clued up than some of dd's friends who haven't even been allowed to make themselves a cup of tea until of secondary school age.