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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate it when people say ''get over it?''

31 replies

dunceinlove · 26/04/2010 21:08

It normally relates to something that is hard to get over like the end of a relationship or loosing a job.

You are all going to tell me to get over it now!

OP posts:
monkeybum1 · 26/04/2010 21:09

I know exactly what you mean - gets right on my nerves! YANBU.

peggotty · 26/04/2010 21:10

YANBU It's a horrible dismissive, hard-faced thing to say. And it makes people sound like teenagers. especially if said about the end of a relationship or losing a job!

outnumbered2to1 · 26/04/2010 21:12

drives me up the wall. Hate it with a passion

lifeissweet · 26/04/2010 21:13

YANBU.

person a: My husband has left me. My house has fallen down. My cat has died. I feel a bit depressed if I'm honest

person b: Just get over it

person a: oh yes. I didn't think of that. I'll just get over it. Silly me.

Life is just not that simple. If only.

Prinpo · 26/04/2010 21:16

Of course YANBU. Fair enough to say it to someone who's fretting over a broken nail but not to someone who has suffered a major event. Tell them to f-off .

singalongamumum · 26/04/2010 21:18

YANBU. It's rude and incredibly dismissive. But I do quite like 'suck it up', for some weird reason.

TarheelMama · 26/04/2010 21:23

YANBU. I had a mc early last year, about a week later, I went out to dinner with friends. They started talking about when to have kids (only one of them knew I'd been pregnant). I couldn't handle it, went to the bathroom to have a cry and the one who did know, told me to 'get over it'. I was shocked/horrified.

Mumcentreplus · 26/04/2010 21:25

pull ya socks up!..really annoying..

SlartyBartFast · 26/04/2010 21:26

get over it op

tis rude i agree.

Coldhands · 27/04/2010 09:52

Its very rude, its annoys me so much. If someone is that down for whatever reason, they obviously can't just 'get over it' and suck it up means exactly the same thing but an even ruder way to say it IMO.

ray81 · 27/04/2010 09:57

YANBU - i have had 6 Mc and my cousin who i am not even close to told me to 'get over it already' needless to say i nearly punched her one, Oh and we dont talk anymore at all. She then went on to have 2 Mc and obviously found it very hard, although i wouldnt wish it on anyone i couldnt help feeling alittle like 'what comes around goes around'. She knows exactly how i feel now and normally people who say these things will learn how hard it is to 'just get over it' in the end as they will experience something just as hard to get over.

StableButDeluded · 27/04/2010 10:02

YANBU. it just smacks of " i can't be arsed listening to your problems, and even if i could I can't be arsed to think of a helpful reply so i'll just say this instead"

And to TarheelMama that a so-called friend said it to you in those circumstances is just unbelievable.

StableButDeluded · 27/04/2010 10:05

Oh, yes, I hate "suck it up" as well. Horrible.

GibbonInARibbon · 27/04/2010 10:17

I think it's a fab phrase and sometimes, a situation just calls for it.

(disclaimer - I am not talking about a break up/job loss etc)

siblingrivalryisrelative · 27/04/2010 10:17

ray81 You 'couldn't help feeling a little like 'what goes around comes around'...with regards to miscarriage??? Seriously??? That's just evil

Tocca · 27/04/2010 10:19

it's not EVIL fgs, overstatement much?

siblingrivalryisrelative · 27/04/2010 10:25

Sorry I forgot my own rule of counting to 10 before replying to things that immediately wind me up.

OK, not EVIL but not called for. I lost my baby last year, 2 days later my friend told me I could just try for another one. 8 weeks later she lost her baby too. I didn't think 'oh well at least you know how I feel now!'

Ray81's comment stung me a bit and I shouldn't have replied. Sorry

DeFluff · 27/04/2010 10:25

fgs - she just meant that now that person knew how she felt. She didn't wish them on her.

Do people on AIBU just lurk like icky black spiders, looking for some poor innocent person who phrased something in an unfortunate way to jump on? Urge rising to say Get. A. Life. [equally horrid phrase I know]

DeFluff · 27/04/2010 10:26

x posts

nighbynight · 27/04/2010 10:26

Yes, it is a very strong thing to say, and often said smugly by people who haven't walked a mile in someones shoes.

I think I have said it in mn, (cant remember when), but I must have been really p**d off.

siblingrivalryisrelative · 27/04/2010 10:26

No I don't lurk on here waiting. Have explained above why I 'snapped' and I've apologised

jonicomelately · 27/04/2010 10:28

It shows a distinct lack of vocabularly and imagination to use phrases such as this. Can't bear them.

DeFluff · 27/04/2010 10:29

I know Sibling, cross posts

And I'm sorry to hear of your loss, horrible, horrible thing to happen.

siblingrivalryisrelative · 27/04/2010 10:36

LOL I know. I'd cross posted with you but figured you'd realise!

Going back to my counting to 10 approach now

Downdog · 27/04/2010 10:47

YANBU - SIL says it all the time and she is widely regarded by all who know her to be a total bitch, uncaring & self centered.

Hate WHATEVER too - but I do think it to myself if OH get's himself worked up & into a rant about something twisted

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