To not want my SIL to visit this weekend?

[pattylepoo]

This is my first post on here, would just like to hear your thoughts on how I can get through this weekend!

It's a long story, so will cut to the chase. My SIL is a total drama queen who craves attention. Last christmas day, she phoned us at 11am to complain that we had not called her, was very upset, full of tears etc. We have two DC's (4yr old & 5 mth old) and my family had already arrived. You can imagine that not much had been achieved by that point anyway, apart from kids unwrapping presents etc. The phone call which my DH took, escalated into a huge row and she went off in tangents shouting at him about the most ridiculous little things. The call lasted for well over an hour and she said some really nasty horrible things which really upset my DH. She had him in tears too. We had just moved into our new home 2 months previous and it was my DS first christmas, so we had both worked really hard to get things straight for our first christmas together in our new home.
The most annoying thing is that she was due to stay with us for a few days after xmas, she even had the nerve to have another full blown row the day before she was due to arrive. She still came, and breezed into our house as if nothing had happened!!
We both endured the 3 days that she stayed and after she had gone I wrote her a letter calmly explaining that I thought her behaviour was terrible and that I wasn't prepared to tolerate anymore of it in future. (she has done this on a few occasions in the past) I just felt I wasn't prepared to stand by with my mouth shut anymore.
Anyway, my letter went ignored, no mention of it at all which I am really mad about. She is due to visit this weekend for the first time since christmas and I don't know how to handle her being in my home. If I had my way, she wouldn't be allowed to visit until she had apologised. My DH says that she has always done this, scream and rant and expect everyone to let it blow over.
Please help. I really don't know what to say to her, if anything. Should I just keep my mouth closed?

Sorry it's a bit long xx

She sounds like a stroppy old maid.Is she on her owne?

Why is she scheduled for another visit (being as she does sound a nightmare?)
Depending on how brave you are feeling I'd either a) stick to my guns... she ruined Xmas, you can barely tolerate her, she didn't apologise, so you could say sorry, I can't cope with your histrionics and prepare for the fallout...
or b) come down with a nasty bout of flu/stress/plague thereby rendering her visit impossible at this time....
or c) spend the weekend blind drunk (or have her blind drunk) so that you can cope!

She sounds pretty hard work.. how does DH feel about her visits? Would he support you if you said, 'not this time thanks, I'm still recovering from Xmas..'?!!?

No, she has a very quiet DH who doesn't give her the banter/arguments that she craves.

DH thinks that as she is his only Sis, he shouldn't give up on their relationship as their mother passed away nearly 2 years ago. He is all she has left, though she does have two kids of her own. DH also thinks that she should be able to see our own DC's regularly. Loving the blind drunk option, me rather than her though I think!!

How is she due to visit this weekend? Who invited her and how long has the visit been planned?

I think it's too late to cancel her visit now - you could have refused to invite her in the first place but you can't just say she can't come. Does your dh agree with you about her behaviour? Would he be willing to read her the riot act when she arrives? Like, tell her she has to be polite and reasonable during her visit or she'll have to leave.

Does your DH want her to come and visit? It is his sister so I think he should take the lead in communicating with her.

I Like Macformes suggestions go for at least one of them.LOL

I wish you luck.

We have a moto in our house, "we don't have the time to see the people we want to see never mind the ones we don't" There for follow Macformes advice.

get your DH to sort it out. She's his sister.

She kind of invited herself as in 'we were thinking of coming up to visit on xxx date' so it's been on the calendar for a while. DH is not relishing her visit, but will not hear of telling her to not come. She will be all smiles and behave herself, I'm sure. I can't imagine she would dare to do otherwise....but I will be ready for her if she does. It's just the ignoring of my letter, we both know I sent it. I just find it extremely hard to play along. I am not good at hiding my feelings!

Thanks fidelma, I totally agree with your motto. Will mention it to DH! Looking forward to getting the Gordon's out!