to think that lots of people are within the grey spectrum!

[Redazzy]

I am an avid supporter of breastfeeding who only breastfed her ds exclusively until 4 weeks, her dd, exclusively for 2 weeks.

I am an avid supporter of a woman's right to choose but hate the idea of termination and view it as morally wrong. When faced with the possibility, I would have chosen termination as a young woman but had a miscarriage before having to make the ultimate decision.

I believe that woman have as much to offer in the workplace as men. However, I feel that children benefit from a parent's care more than outsourced childcare especially in the early years.

I believe that children who are academically talented are more 'valued' in this world than others who do not make the grade. I am proud of my ds who is 'academically valued' yet am furious on behalf of my friend's children who are not.

I believe that obesity is caused exclusively (except in the smallest percentage of cases) by eating too much and exercising too little. Yet I despise the current emphasis on weight and size. I sometimes judge others by their size. Yet I don't want to be judged. I have been morbidly obese and recently normal weight.

I would never dress my children in slogan laden clothing. Yet I have given them fruit shoots, mcdonalds and on one occasion, before a trip to the theatre, a gregg's sausage roll. I try to ensure that they eat a healthy diet yet my son will eat peas only under the greatest duress. His vegetable intake unless you count potato's, tomato based sauses and baked beans is nil!

I am an intelligent woman who does not have a job and has no idea what she is going to do with her life once her youngest dd starts school in September.

I have met most of my best friends from Mums n Tots Playgroups. But I understand the annoyance and frustration of listening to endless baby stories and comparisons. I have been that new face (from another country) and I know what walking into those rooms full of strangers feels like.

I have been under the influence of alcohol in social situations with my dc present but would be horrified if this impacted suffficiently on my ability to act as a parent. I would not be able to drive them to A&E but I would be able to put on a plaster or put them to bed.

I smoke but only when my dc are not present and judge the parent who walks along pushing the buggy with a fag in their hand.

Am I the only one with no strong moral compass?

Skidoodly, in the sprirt of this thread, I am going to say they count as half of one of your 5 a day. So you better eat double portion of chips

Umm your prolly wrong about obesity, a large number of people who have no other family members obese might be that way because of a virus, look here

Redazzy you are fab, I think I love you xxxx what a great op

Great OP!

Potatoes count as a starch. Shite innit?

oooh, a post that makes you think it's safe to come out on mn. I love your post, and could compare and contrast with a smile (we do slogan t-shirts but never greggs sausage rolls ).

Just some confirmation that we're all doing the best we can, with the resources we have and sometimes we're superwoman and other times we cut a few corners and that's OK.

i think most people are not black or white on most issues. i think we reason and debate and can often see both sides of an issue! your OP probably encompasses how most people feel.

That's a great post redazzy

You've made me feel that maybe I am normal and can absolve myself of some of that terrible mother's guilt I have when I'm weighing up exactly the same stuff in my overworkedtired brain!!

The one time we had to take a DD to A & E I was stone cold sober but could not drive because she would not leave the comfort of my arms.

Great post Redazzy! I'm a MN lurker and by your definition a shades of grey person too!
I will vote for the party you lead.

Can't stand sausage rolls though.....

Redazzy - RL is not like MN. Nothing is black and white in RL like it is on an MN screen.

Similar questions fly around my head. My DSs would love to go to MacDonalds but I won't let them. They love Fruitshoots and think they are a treat when other people give them one to drink. The DSs do not care if I have a glass of wine. I HATE the whole X factorisation of our society but DSs think Simon Cowel et. al. are great.

I worry far too much about being a good parent but the fact is I (and am sure you) have 2 lovely happy healthy children and we should focus on that - not agonising over the details.

AmeliaJaneAgain

Do you think we should start a social networking group? We can all agree with eachother and it would be lovely.

On the flip side, I do enjoy the very strong opinions I see on MN but often feel that my greyness prevents me posting except if I can offer a very salient response which I think would be helpful. By the time I have read all the posts and weighed up the rightness and wrongness of it all, I am back to bland again! I am definitely not the MN woman on which the election will be fought and won!

I'm a bit of a shades of grey person myself. I have quite strong opinions on what is right for ME and MY family, but I am tolerant of differing points of view and I don't really sweat the small stuff- especially where other people are concerned.

"I do enjoy the very strong opinions I see on MN but often feel that my greyness prevents me posting except if I can offer a very salient response which I think would be helpful. By the time I have read all the posts and weighed up the rightness and wrongness of it all, I am back to bland again!"

Exactly... this is why I so rarely post. Any opinion I might have has invariably already been expressed.

I think more shades of grey would be a good thing on MN.

There are large parts I will not post on thouh because they are so full of people who will not tolerate debate or accept a post from someone who is uncertain or wants to say somthing nuanced or a bit self contradictory.

Lurkers unite!

What a beautifully constructed piece from the OP. You sound like a nice, warm, rounded human being, with whom I would gladly share a bottle of wine!

I mainly lurk also, mainly to get amusement from some of the genuinely witty comments. But there is also a certain voyeuristic thrill from watching some of the extremism, which I suspect most posters would not exhibit in RL.

What I particularly like about MN is the fact that the outspoken is expected, tolerated and celebrated. I've only come to the site as a result of media interest that some regulars have been complaining about. I came for a casual look, thinking MN would be a bunch of people exclusively discussing breastfeeding and nappies when I was long past that stage in my life. I can say that I've been drawn in by the spirit, downright honesty and obvious camaraderie of many posters.

Vive la difference! And it's OK to be grey.

Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)

Do we have a new Baz Luhrmann in the house?

Excellent op.

I am grey too.

sings

~~it's okay
to be grey~~

Credits lyrics singsinthebath
music wukter

I will sing it at my next ablutions!

Very grey here

Definately Redazzy, look at all the members we'd have!

I know what you mean about reading and rarely posting, on more than one occasion I've even started writing something, re-read and then deleted it as I sound a bit conciliatory/middle of the road/boring compared to some of the really strong opinions being expressed.

Also, quite frequently I want to say 'come off it, life's not that black and white' but am not sure how that'll go down in the moment!

Yep I'm a grey (I think) or maybe indecisive . No I think I'm often able to see another perspective other than my own and I'm a better person for it. Although, I do love a good rant from some mners!