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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to want to take an hour off owrk to go to dentist

11 replies

Mollycat1 · 14/04/2010 10:15

I work as a chilminder and have done for the last 18mths. In that time I have had 1 day off sick and have finished early twice, once for dentist and once for a wedding dress fitting!!

I have a filling that came out 5 weeks ago and I have tried to get appointments that fit in around all the parents but its just not happening. I warned all the parents on Monday I need time off next week and one of the parents is having a right strop about it!! Have given them over a weeks notice adn means that I will start work at 10.30 instead of 8.00 :-(

She wants me to take her child with me!! My dentist wont do work if a child is there, he is only 2 and a half.

OP posts:

emsyj · 14/04/2010 10:18

YANBU. You only get one set of teeth FFS, and dental pain is the worst ever. Go to the dentist.

Goingspare · 14/04/2010 10:24

You've given notice, go to the dentist. If the parent wants to send her child to a different minder that's her prerogative; just hope she doesn't get a replacement who's sick all the time...

Goingspare · 14/04/2010 10:24

Bet she won't take her child away, by the way.

Original poster

Mollycat1 · 14/04/2010 12:29

Oh, its just so annoying, its not like I let her down every week!!.

Just got a text from her saying, will try and sort something out for Thurs but cant promise anything!!

So tempted to write back that I am not asking her I am telling her I cant work but will restrain myself until i can speak to her in person this evening.

OP posts:

carrotsarenottheonlyvegetable · 14/04/2010 12:43

It's really tough for the parent to find cover within a week, especially if there's no alternative for her. In this case I feel you've every right to go to the dentist - it needs doing, tiz all there is to it. But I can understand her being upset.

However, given you circumstances she can be upset at the situation but she shouldn't be upset at you. If all else fails she'll have to take the time off work herself.

gingernutlover · 14/04/2010 12:52

i too can understand her being upset and annoyed - I am a teacher and when dd starts school in spet this kind of thing is going to cause a massive problem for me, I cannot go in late and I cannot take annual leave.

However, you are entitled to go to the dentist and if you are in a lot of pain then a weeks notice is fair enough.

Are you planning on charging for the hours you cannot work?

magso · 14/04/2010 13:07

YANBU at all but I can see the other side too - it can be very difficult to find cover at short notice. In our village the CMs although all working as individuals, often suggest cover for such emergency situations between them. It is really helpful!! Do you know a colleague that could take the lad for a couple of hours? Of course it is not your responsibility but you may have better contacts than the childs Mum.

Original poster

Mollycat1 · 14/04/2010 13:09

Gingernutlover- No I never have chanrged if I have been off they usually pay for a half day rate even if I am back in an hour so basically they get 20euro off of there rate (I am in Ireland).

I can understand that it is hard for some people to get cover for jobs but as I know what the job is and she spends more time shopping than working (tells me this all the time!!) as she is out of the office. I also know that she is flexi time (told me this to!!) and she can work at anythime during the week as long as she does a certain amount of hours so I offered to keep her DS late instead!!

AAARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH I just feel guilty, I am that type of person.

Thankfully only time tooth hurts is when I eat!!

OP posts:

gingernutlover · 14/04/2010 21:22

bearing in mind everything you've just said YANBU at all.

Hope the tooth feels better soon

Pozzled · 14/04/2010 21:55

YANBU at all. If you were sick, she would have to arrange alternative childcare with virtually no notice.

This kind of situation can be really hard for some working mums, but if she's on flexitime it shouldn't be an issue. Does she have a meeting that day or something?

Greenshadow · 14/04/2010 22:02

YANBU, but I must admit that this kind of situation is one of the reasons we ended up going for a nursery for DS1.
Started off looking at childminders, but when it dawned on us that our holidays would have to be taken when theirs were, and that sickness etc would mean short-notice childcare issues, we ended up selecting a nursery which, until we had looked in to it, we had been very much against.

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