Dh has a friend who he went travelling with in his teens and although they do not see each other a lot due to distance, dh would consider them to be good friends. We do try and go and see them as and when we can but having 2 small children, jobs, doing a house up, family commitments it is not very often tbh. (maybe 2 -3 times a year)
I send presents for his child for birthday and Christmas.
When we got married, said friend (James) went on dh's stag do (in this country). James was one of our ushers and we paid for his suit etc for the wedding.
A few months ago, James said he was getting married and he wanted dh to be a part of the wedding. Nothing further was mentioned as to what part this would be. (Not the best man as we know who that is)
Both stag do and the wedding are abroad.
I am due to give birth to our 3rd child in May and due to time and cost restraints we decided that dh would go alone to the wedding. It will cost in region of £500 for dh to go to wedding and we will not be able to afford a holiday ourselves due to this.
Yesterday James was really off hand with dh as dh told him he could not afford to go to the stag do(which is in July)
I am furious and tbh I feel like saying that dh should not bother going to either.
To me, it seems like James only bothers with dh when he wants something - eg, he turned up a few weeks ago when he was "passing" with his laptop as he could not get it to work. Dh sorted it out and James then turned up for it and wandered off without staying for a cup of tea!!!
Reading that back, it sounds rather childish I know.
Dh does not have many close friends and I guess I do feel bad for him that this "friend" is being difficult.