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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not go on the Easter trip to MIL's?

22 replies

carocaro · 31/03/2010 23:57

I have told DH I am staying at home over Easter, he can go to his Mum's with our boys (3&7). They are about4 hours away.

I have a stinking cough and cold, puffy face rash, some sort of virus, I have not had a break for over 18 months, and life has been darn stressfull with redundancy and all the £ worries. DH has been away lots for jobs, interviews etc, so has had time out.

I feel exhausted, mentally and physically, I need to sleep and have some time out. His Mum never stops talking all day long, eats with her mouth full and spits out food, DH's sister and husband will be there too and the boys will have lots of fun. The house is tiny, me Dh and the boys all have to sleep in the same room, DH snores so loud, I hardly sleep. And his Step Dad and MIL take an age to get sorted and there is lots of hanging and waiting about.

DH thinks I am being wierd. I do feel a bit bad, as they boys love the seaside and I could do with some sea air, but the thought of it outweighs the benefits.

It's only 2 nights, 3 days.

AIBU?

OP posts:
mummychicken · 01/04/2010 00:15

Why do you have to go to his mother's?

He goes, takes kids, you sleep in your own bed

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 01/04/2010 00:18

YANBU.

Apart from anything else I would think they would all be pleased you were keeping your rashes, cold and whatever else far away! No offence obviously, but it would be ideal.

Stay at home, sleep, eat chocolate and enjoy the peace and quiet!

sunnydelight · 01/04/2010 01:38

YANBU - send them off and enjoy a bit of peace and quiet. There is nothing worse than not feeling well in someone else's house (especially if there really isn't enough space to take yourself off and rest if you need to).

You say your DH thinks you're being a bit wierd - it would probably be an easier weekend for him with you there but that's not considering what's best for you.

gtamom · 01/04/2010 05:55

YANBU. Probably best not to spread your germs around anyways. It sounds like you really need some rest and totally understandable that you are not up to visiting.
Hope you get well soon.

tortoiseonthehalfshell · 01/04/2010 06:00

YANBU at all. Your kids will have a tremendous time, your husband will have help with them if he needs it (which I'm sure he won't, being a functioning adult and all, but still), the seaside will be the seaside even if you are not there, and you can't inflict your cold and your virus on a whole household of adults and chldren!

Do enjoy your break, you poor thing, it sounds actually delightful to have a whole weekend alone (even sick) and you should lay in a stockpile of non-cook comfort food and do as little as possible.

porcamiseria · 01/04/2010 09:34

YANBU, you are ILL. ham it up even worse, and get some rest, dont feel guilty

chicaguapa · 01/04/2010 09:38

YANBU. I often stay at home when DH takes DC to MIL. It's never a major problem for anyone. Good luck.

damnedchilblains · 01/04/2010 09:42

YANBU I completely understand, I always want dh to take our dc's to mil's by himself but he always refuses . If you're not feeling well you're not going to be particularly any fun anyway so they'll probably have a better time without you. (not in a nasty way)

However "His Mum never stops talking all day long, eats with her mouth full and spits out food" this is a little unreasonable, pretty harsh and not particularly a reason not to go so I do hope you haven't insulted your dh's mother to his face.

siblingrivalryisrelative · 01/04/2010 09:46

Do it! @ time to yourself

wukter · 01/04/2010 10:02

YANBU.
Hopefully you make a miraculous recovery as they walk out the door.
You can have 14 hour sleepathons.
Wine and a sleep-in.
Watch wimmins programmes that everyone groans at to your hearts content.

You can't possibly go and spread your germs to your SIL's DC. That would be U.

chicaguapa · 01/04/2010 20:02

The downside is that you have to get out of bed in the morning to get a cup of tea as there's no-one around to bring you one.

groundhogs · 01/04/2010 20:29

Eh chicaguapa? That really happens? people get brought tea/coffee in BED?????

chicaguapa · 01/04/2010 21:22

...

Coldhands · 01/04/2010 22:06

YANBU, enjoy the time off, tell your DH what you have said on here. If he is weird about it, let him be. Your DCs will have a great time and so will you.

ilovepiccolina · 01/04/2010 22:16

YANBU. I wouldn't want to go either, unless I was going to stay in a hotel, rather than their house. Four hour drive & cramped house? Sounds v. familiar - no thanks.

Last year DH went on holiday with DS and his parents. They did lots of manly things like fishing. MIL got to spoil DH. DD and I stayed at home. It was bliss. They are all going again this year

DinahRod · 01/04/2010 22:28

Be very, very noble. You couldn't possibly risk infecting ILs with the awful viral infection you have, nor want ppl to have to wait on you hand and foot when ill.

thesecondcoming · 01/04/2010 22:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AmericanHag · 01/04/2010 23:32

YANBU to want to avoid spending that much time at your ILs whether you're sick or not.

Take care of yourself while your guys are away. By the time they get home they'll be exhausted, but you'll feel much better!

octopusinabox · 01/04/2010 23:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2rebecca · 02/04/2010 00:41

YANBU. Sounds as though you are infectious. Even if we're well sometimes I'll visit my parents without my husband for a few days as husband has other plans, his parents don't need more than a day visit, but otherwise I suspect he'd often go on weekend visits to them without me.
I don't have to worry about him being bored if I go without him and vv. other people's relatives are nearly always boring at best. More than a day is overkill especially if you are unwell.
I wouldn't be happy with someone visiting me if they're unwell and would prefer them to stay at home.

Condensedmilkaddict · 02/04/2010 00:52

YANBU.

Enjoy yourself.

Wish I could get do the same, but they're all coming here!

ilovepiccolina · 02/04/2010 21:47

So, we're all coming round yours for the PAAAAAAAAARTY, then?

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