To go behind her back?

[honeybehappy]

My DN is 12 and hasnt seen his dad since he was 4ish.

My DN has been asking my sister for a pic of his dad for the last year and she has done nothing about getting one. His dad txts my sister about once a month and he is lucky if she bothers to reply.

She now has a new boyfriend and just completly ignores the subject when i bring it up and he buts in saying he better not come round here , this is the man she has been seeing for all of 3 fucking months so none of his business really. Before this man came on the scene my sister was all for him seeing his dad aslong as my DN wanted to but now she is dead againts the idea. I have just sent my DN's sister (same dad) a message on FB to ask for a picture.

My sister will probably go mental but to be honest im doing this for my nephew because i know otherwise he wont ever get one. My sister has completely changed in the last few months and she is not putting my DN first, it breaks my heart to say but i couldnt give a fuck if she never speakes to me again. she doesnt bother with my dd's anymore who actually cry for her (they are 2 and 4).

I know when you get a new relationship you change but she has turned into a complete fucking moran.

Forgot to add her new BF told my DN to give back the xmas money he got from his dad and he would give it to him . He is really againts the idea of my DN getting to know his dad.

can your nephew not ask his sister himself???

I don;'t think you should go behind her back tbh, but I do think that if you can it would be worth talking to her about it, and there is nothing wrong with talking to DN's sister (i am presuming she is a bit older?) and seeing if she would talk to him and find out what he wants and maybe provide it?

there must be a reason why DN hasn't seen his dad for the past 8 years... that's nothing to do with her new relationship

My sister erased her number from his phone and blocked her on FB cos she didnt want them to know about her new BF. Yes she is the same age as me, just about to have her first baby who my nephew probably wont ever get to see.

He hasnt ever had an interest in seeing him but he has just started senior school and he is getting older and curious about him.

I also don't understand why, if she was in favour of contact before new partner came on the scene, DN hasn't seen his dad for so many years. The picture is not really the issue here.

Oops, cross posted. Sorry, but if you separate when a child is 4, you don't have no contact simply because the child doesn't have an interest in seeing their other parent. Can you say more about why contact didn't happen over those years? It just doesn't add up, especially if the mother was in favour of it happening. Did the dad try to make contact happen?