to not like seeing parents shovel food into the mouths of little babies who clearly aren't hungry

[froglegs]

and then not understand why they are crying

Sometimes I feel as though I've lumbered out of the forest.

sorry what is the point of this thread ?
nothing wrong with blw, spag bol, a bit of eating with a spoon and finger foods. nothing wrong with any kind of eating, generally. sorry, what are we actually discussing ?

and all these people who have seen food shovelling ? errr , what kind of places do you frequent ? because i have never seen such things. both my boys eat like horses. but when they've had enough, either of being spoon fed or of feeding themselves, they stop. end of.

People judge people about everything all the time - isn't that the point on this topic?

only joking!! (kind of)

But that is part of the early weaning process and quite natural for the baby to "spit out" the food with their tonge. It's all part of the learning process.

Some babies get to the point of tears when they are hungry and unlike milk, solids aren't instantly satifying so it is more likely the baby will cry until they feel full.

creeps back under rock

My niece was weaned before she was term (32 weeker IIRC) and all her brothers and sister were weaned at equally early ages (although they weren't premature so at least past term) I can't see how anyone can say that no baby will eat when they're not hungry, I can't see a term baby being that desperate for food that they're allowing it.

I have to admit after watching those children being weaned on a large jar a meal at those ages was part of the appeal of BLW.

I'm a little confused how anyone can "mix" BLW and puree. It sounds like some people think that puree weaning is supposed to be just purees. I have never read anything that says purees only. Annabel Karmel, NHS guidelines, any parenting book I've read have all said to give the child a spoon when you puree feed them and to give them finger food. AK even says puree stage is supposed to last 2 weeks...

There's nothing wrong with spoon feeding, but I also don't like seeing people pushing food into babies' mouths when they're spitting it out or keeping their mouths closed and turning their heads away.

I'm sure the mums are doing it with the best intentions and just want their babies to eat, but it is uncomfortable to see.

Nobody said there was anything wrong with those things Oblomov.

I got a bit eye-rolly about some people who think BLW is the only way and anything else is just forced shovelling and assume that child has been subject to early weaning.

The spag bol thing was light hearted as it is almost always mentioned with regard to BLW.

confud
"I think the point about BLW and spag bol is that anything can be eaten as you'll often hear people say "Oh but how will they eat..." so you tend to get a little defensive in advance."

Isn't that defensiveness a little unnecessary though? Can't you just say "she just eats things with her hands", like I did?

Most people don't have any kind of ideological or emotional attachment to spoons. They won't really care that you are not using them with your baby. Getting all defensive about people asking questions is just turning something straightforward into a big deal.

Sometimes it seems that people who are really into BLW (rather than just doing it) really, really, really hate spoons.

"I'm a little confused how anyone can "mix" BLW and puree."

I'm a little confused as to why they couldn't, unless BLW is a movement with rules you have to obey with rather than some suggestions for how to give food to your baby.

nothing wrong with spoon feeding, even i dont think wrong with feeding a 5 months as someone mentioned here..
but force feeding is not nice, and you can see the difference whether they are just spoon feeding or trying to keep feeding more and force when they clearly dont want it. i know cos i have seen my mil in action with the force feed many times, some people do not get the idea that a baby can be full before finishing the whole container, and does not HAVE to finish the whole portion

skidoodly, true BLW'ers don't like spoons. becasue that goes against the notion of the child being in control. true blw'ers don't mix the two, ie.. finger and puree.`
i think you are watering down what true BLW is.

"true BLWers"
"watering down what true BLW is"

PMSL

How do spoons go against the child being in control? What if the child is the one holding the spoon?

Or do you feel terribly oppressed every time you have a bowl of soup?

"about the mother - what on earth did she think she was teaching him about food / healthy eating?" - this was in reference to a 5 month old so i can only presume teaching these topics was not a priority!!

i think BLW is cool and finger foods are fun but there is a culture of such anxiety about food and thinking that you can 'teach' small babies about healthy eating is ridiculous! it's nice to feed them a healthy range of foods but a bit of over-zealous spoonfeeding is hardly going to tip them into a lifestyle of chip-shop-fuelled obesity! equally, who cares about whether your 7 month old has been introduced to a 'range of tastes' (as per AK), butternut squash and all - when they get to 18months, they'll like what they like (and potentially refuse half of it!) regardless of how they were treated as little babies...

I agree that force feeding is wrong, although I can't say I have seen it happen.

However, I don't think that spoons are always bad or that they automatically take the control away from the child. Didn't know much about BLW when I weaned DD at just over 5 months. We offered her pureed food and she showed us how much she enjoyed it- big open mouth, reaching for next spoonful etc. As soon as she lost interest, we stopped giving her more. That seemed to me a lot like giving her control, or am I missing something?

Can you not be BLW and spoon feeding? DS was left pretty much to his own devices but I did open jars on more than one occasion. Is there a rule/line where it becomes one or another. Also stewed apples are delicious and it often ended up one spoon for DS one for Mummy and so on and so forth.

I too have no idea how you can forcefeed a small baby, DS was always quite happy to spit it straight in my face if he didn't want it.

Spag bol is an hysterical thing to feel a baby/toddler if you have a dog sitting under the high chair. Makes note to self to buy a dog before we get to that stage again.

The reason I'm confused as to how you can mix BLW and purees is because AK, NHS etc recommend weaning by giving finger food along side purees so what's different between "traditional weaning" and mixing? You obviously think I'm looking at this from a different angle to what I am.

Unless you've had everyone you meet in real life tell you how hard done by your child is because they can't eat everything then you wouldn't understand the defensiveness. Everytime you see the HV/ grandparents/ random bystander in the cafe they ask "but how will they eat weetabix/ spag bol/yoghurts/ soup..." It becomes bit of a broken record "yes, she can even manage spag bol!"

YANBU- it's abusive.

If a child is always in control, when they don't have adequate coordination then how do they feed themselves?

If I let DS feed himself all the time I would be subjected to having to give him 2 or 3 extra meals a day because he turns his plate upside down - even when he is still hungry. Also, he never puts the spoon in his mouth first he stares at it for ages and wipes the contents all over his face.

I don't understand how spoon-feeding can be detrimental to their nutritional status unless the suggestion is that less of the food will be home made.

I just don't understand how BLWs do it. Or am I being thick?

A 6 month old should have adequate co-ordination to put food into their mouths - finger food rather than puree though of course!

My dd has refused to let me feed her since the age of 9 months-she closed her mouth and shook her head on repeated occasions. If I had continued to spoon feed her instead of giving her finger foods and letting her feed herself, than that would have been abusive and wrong.

Nothing to do with BLW, just common sense and good practice, annoying and messy though it is!

Not getting involved in the whole blw debate but OP YANBU-

one of my pet hates is people sprinting around after their crawling/toddling children at playgroups and shovelling food into their mouths.

If they want to go and play let them, they can't really be that hungry. If you want/need them to eat at a specific time take them to one side and sit them down to eat..

One woman was feeding her child at the top of a slide with a queue of children waiting to slide down..

Agree with Screaming, don't worry about the plate or spoon for that matter. Just give things of a size they can hold and they can manage. Some figure spoons out quickly, some don't.

I think the thing is that BLW is about not stressing what's going in, my 15 month old still doesn't eat much in the way of solids, we give opportunities when we eat but aparently breast is better. Although petite, Baby is in proportional size and healthy. Toddler though took straight to eating and almost completely dropped breastfeeding.

confud

"The reason I'm confused as to how you can mix BLW and purees is because AK, NHS etc recommend weaning by giving finger food along side purees so what's different between "traditional weaning" and mixing? You obviously think I'm looking at this from a different angle to what I am."

When I hear "finger foods alongside purees" I think of giving puree with maybe a carrot stick to nibble on as well.

With DD, she ate everything with her hands pretty much, but we used spoons (one for me and one for her) for foods that would normally be eaten with a spoon, e.g. soup. I never bothered making special BLW meals e.g. porridge pancakes, she either ate porridge with her hands or we'd get some spoons (OR secret option no. 3 she basically refused to eat porridge at all )

Now, I suppose that isn't "true" BLW and to be honest, I couldn't give a shite. But it was different from what most people I knew were doing because there was far more emphasis on her feeding herself from the start and she didn't have much that was mashed up.

"Unless you've had everyone you meet in real life tell you how hard done by your child is because they can't eat everything then you wouldn't understand the defensiveness. Everytime you see the HV/ grandparents/ random bystander in the cafe they ask "but how will they eat weetabix/ spag bol/yoghurts/ soup..." It becomes bit of a broken record "yes, she can even manage spag bol!""

Everyone you meet in real life has an opinion on how you feed your child? Really?

I got a few "wow, your 6 month old baby eats whole apples by herself?" but that was about it. I just can't imagine that many people being that arsed about it.

Well said LJBrownie, I was wondering myself about teaching a 5 month old baby good eating habits.