I have just had DS2 (4 days) and my mum has come to stay to help me with the new baby and our toddler (2 on Sunday). We have a difficult relationship anyway and I would not have asked her to come as thought I would find it more stressful to have her here than not, especially as we have a nanny share for DS1 which helps a lot, and DH is on paternity leave, but she insisted. And I was right. She means so well but the net effect of her staying is that I end up more stressed than otherwise. She does loads to help our nanny look after DS1 (cooking meals, going to playgroups with them, cleaning up after them, all of which the nanny should be doing) then looks put out if I ask her to help me with anything. For example, the time I really need help around 6/7am - DS2 is up most of the night feeding and by 5/6am DS1 is often stirring and in our room wanting to read/play. Would be really helpful to be able to hand him over to someone until 7/7.30 but she doesn't get up until 7 then wants time to have a cup of tea/breakfast before taking on DS. I asked her to take him this am as I was desperate (boobs are agony at the mo and had less than 2 hours sleep) and she looked really peed off and made a comment to the nanny when she came at 8.30 at how behind she was in her day!! She also insists on cooking which is SO kind of her but her cooking has really really gone down hill in the last few years and DH and I just can't eat what she cooks. We've tried to direct her by just saying, don't worry about food, we'll get a takeaway, or offering to cook, but she is very rigid and sees the kitchen as her domain. She makes loads of food that noone wants to eat then gets angry when she has to throw it away. She also refuses to buy anything organic (I have told her that we buy organic milk, eggs, meat etc) for DS and, again, she tuts and says what a waste of money. She keeps giving DS rubbish to eat unless I am there to direct her. I sound really ungrateful - as I said, the intent is good but I honestly think I would feel less stressed if she left DH and I have also had numerous difficulties and her presence is not helping on that front. She is also very messy and keeps breaking things in the house. Not a big deal but just craving peace and quiet and being able to eat/not eat what I feel like! Can I ask her to leave? I am trying to agree an end date with her but she looks offended whenever I raise it!