what do your dh do on their days off work?

[issysmilkbottle]

ok... Dh works shifts and so not the usual mon-fri, 9-5. His days off can be mid week or weekends plus he takes the occasional groups of days off....

I have a 10 year old ds who lives with us, a 14 year old dsd who doesnt live with us and we have a 17 week old dd.

I am currently on maternity leave from my phd, but start back 1st april, full time but can do some work at home so we've agreed to split dds care around dhs shifts so i will do my time in odd chunks. We are also trying to move house next week...

My question is, what do your dh's do on their days off work? My dh seems to think its his right to stay in bed until lunchtime or near then, watch tv, perhaps hoover 1 room, have a little play with dd and then go for a walk (ie. To town/pub) at about 3 or 4 and come back around half six- half eight.... This is his usual pattern even this week when we need to sort stuff to move! If i say anything iabu and nagging,.... What do you think? Aibu? What do your dhs do?

nothing and I don't expect him to he works bloody hard, in excess of 70 hours mostly at night as a self employed taxi owner-driver I don't work but take care of the house and kids one of whom has complex needs and do his books

My word shineyandnew, sure you are not with my exh. He couldn't do a thing with or for the dc without needing me to be standing there to witness it in breathless admiration. I was actually laughing at your post (bitterly) it was so similar to him.

I am divorcing mine atm but he is not going without a fight.

Spends time with the DSs who he sees very little of during the week. Looks after them by himself for 3-4 hours each weekend so I can work. Does some jobs round the house and/or garden. We all go out together a couple of times, into town or to the park with the dog. Sometimes he has to work, but that's usually from home at a weekend so he does it in the evening.

I came through a difficult marriage break-up and am now with new dp whom I consider perfect in many ways! But, although he does do some household jobs when I ask him he will never notice what needs doing, and if he has time off when I am working he will generally do his own thing, leaving the 'magic fairy' to do all the usual stuff. I try to get it in perspective because I hate nagging and we are so happy in general he is fantatsic with the kids and he adores me. So I have a lot to be thankful for. However the housework issue really gets on my nerves. Once or twice I've had my say, things then get better but it's not long before normal service resumed.

IMO when men say 'don't nag me' it is code for 'please permit me to behave like a lazy slob'.