to feel angry with my MIL and DH?

[Raspberryjam]

We bought a holiday home abroad a while ago and have been doing it up - it is nearly finished. It also is in the village where my DHs grandparents come from.

My DH and I have not stayed there yet and are hoping to go sometime this summer - we have still to get bedding/kitchen stuff etc organised .
My MIL has just asked my DH if she can have a holiday there in July - to which he replied yes. So she will be the first to stay in our new home.

We of course plan to go on holiday with her and with my own family, but I would like to go first to organise the place.It feels like there is no respect for me and no boundaries. Should I just go with the flow or say no?

You should go for a long weekend with DH before MIL's holiday to sort the house out, and if you have DC's get MIL to babysit.

In answer to giveitago, DH has today said he will sort it out with her - he wouldn't be happy if I heard the phone conversation with her, however and wants to talk to her in private. Not sure how effectively it will be sorted out - if you want a picture of the family dynamics -think "everybody loves Raymond" and you wouldn't be too far off!

Good - and ensure that arrangements involving you and your family are not made without involving you.

It sounds as though having a home in your husband's family's territory isn't such a good idea if your husband is letting his family claim the home as theirs rather than his family recognising it as your house.

You could be right 2rebecca, but we do love the area and it is great for our daughter to learn the language and know about her family roots. My own family- my dad,siblings will also use the house.