to think if you can't be bothered being strict about road safety you should watch your child properly?

[Cobweb95]

My friend is up in arms because she found her 4 yr old DS in the road outside nursery the other day. Someone left the gate open and he wandered out. While she was busy having a chat. Luckily there were no cars around at the time.

When she first told me how angry she was, I assumed she meant with her DS. But she is angry that none of the other mums stopped him or told him to go back in. I can just about see her point there, but now she is trying to get everyone to complain to the (lovely) nursery about their security. I don't think that's necessary - there is a sign telling you to keep the gate closed, but these things happen, and personally I think parents need to be really strict about children learning to stop at the road. I'm 99% certain my 4 yr old would stop, due to extensive training, and I'd come down extremely hard on him if he didn't, especially without looking first.

This particular mum is.....vague I would say. She certainly thinks it's normal for a 4 yr old to not know about stopping at roads.

Am I being unreasonable?

Slightly off at a tangent but speaking as a parent who's three year old keeps running off constantly at the rate of superman. Yes, I agree that it is a mum's responsibility to keep and eye on their offspring however speaking as a mum who has a stomach ulcer through sheer worry because my three year old just won't stay still long enough for me to even grab her.

Tried a leash but she got out when one and a half. Pushchair she screams and can get out of that now too.

I am totally focused on her all the time usually and never get time to even look at another parent let alone talk to one at nursery.

My three year old still will not stay with me even though I have tried to do road safety and talking about how not to run off and shown her so many times before. She tunes out on me and I am at my wits end as see the other parents whose kids stay with them.

It make me feel such a failure sometimes especially when I am on the train and someone tells me that I should talk to my screaming child (because they did with theirs) who I have just spend over 40 minutes trying to pysically and verbally get into the pushchair and to calm down because she is so tired and is screaming with tiredness. Meanwhile I am trying so hard to stay calm and try not to panic.

some people think now my dd has a problem because she just does not listen to them. She will listen but only when she wants too.

I can be strict with her and sometimes this can work and other times like today it does not and she could have been killed on a road she ran into. I don't know what to do about this as am in a strange country with no support system (husband her on work) and feel very isolated and like I am the only one whose kid does this. Any advice would be much appreciated. Sorry if i am gatecrashing this blog but was looking for anything that might be able to help.