to be angry at my brother going on holiday

[NiceIfYouCanAffordIt]

I do love him but he is driving me mad.

He has a chip on his shoulder about the world owing him a living and how disabled he is

He is not disabled he has gone through most of the illness which according to the government would entitled him to disability benefits rather than the standard dole but not convinced anyone he has got anything yet.

We have gone through autism, depression, dyslexia...all unfounded.

Now he is working on ADHA diagnosis and managed to get an disability officer helping him !

I just think he is taking the piss out of people who really have additional needs and using resources he is not entitled to which is immoral.

He claims because he forgets things so he can't hold down a job I suggested he writes them down in a diary. Apparently he won't remember to look in his diary, I suggested setting an alarm on his mobile to remind him to look in his diary...silence. There are always ways around problems like this. I have every symptom he has and I managed to work for years.

He is very social, has loads of friends and manages to do everything he wants to except paid work.
He managed to hold down a job in the past when he was a student and needed the cash, but he prefers to enjoy his free time and pointed out a full time job would interfere with his free day courses at the local college (art, clay etc) FFS

He is just lazy and wants to please himself which would be fine if he wasn't sat on the dole doing this. He does a couple of days volunteer work a week and when this came up as a paid position, didn't apply for it. He wants to stay on the dole and housing benefit.

Not that I blame him, he is off for a weeks foreign holiday next month..how he has the money living on benefits I have no idea. Suppose it helps that he has no family.

Mutter, mutter. I am so sorry that all our taxes goes to pay to support people like my brother, lazy fuckers I suppose if he spends another decade or so looking he might find a problem which means he can stay on the dole officially until retirement age. He has already been on it for years.

I also apologize if you or yours do suffer for any of the conditions I have mentioned in my post. Genuine suffers deserve all the help and support they can get. This is not to be confused with my NT brother.

I rant here as it would upset everyone if I ranted in RL and to be honest having just found out about his holiday has me spitting feathers.

I can't say I blame you and without going into too much detail, feel much the same about one of my SIL's. lazy mare, could work but won't.

Def NBU. I have a cousin and her husband who have rorted the system their entire lives. Dodgy so-called disabilities, including an early work related shoulder injury that prevents cousin's husband from doing any work, but does not prevent him playing golf and bowls and nor does it prevent him from laying a concrete slab for his garage. Cousin gets a carer's allowance for him. Makes me sick. (That and the fact that they leech off my mother and other relatives as they are 'doing it so hard').

It infuriates me that there are people who genuinely unable to work, who genuinely struggle, and there are others who just think they deserve a free ride.

So, rant away.

Mpuppy, I'd forgotten about carers allowance and the car she gets. Luckily for me, I don't need to see her more than once every couple of years, I think we would come to blows (or at least I'd hit her with her child substiute cat.)

Honestly, my temper is up just thinking of it!

Yes, thankfully I do not see my cousin and her DH often. They do not speak much to me since I refused to have them stay for a week long holiday at our house. (The background to that is that when staying at my parents house the year before cousin cut her finger on a knife and asked my parents if they had third party liability in case it got infected).

Sorry for mini-hijack NiceIfYouCan!

I feel better that you agree that I am not being unreasonable. I was worried my post might upset people who have genuine need to be on the dole and/or have disability allowance.

That's the difference though isn't it. Genuine need for benefits rather than lazyarseitis.

Def NBU. It's hard enough for people with "invisible" illnesses to be taken seriously without people pretending to have them.

Too right. It is the fact he wants everyone to feel so sorry for him, poor little boy can not hold down a job

Stop being so fussy and just get a fucking job. It doesn't have to be worthwhile and have an amazing supportive boss, be interesting and pay well. The only work he would consider. But with no experience or advance education no one will walk into a dream job.

He does not like service jobs, nothing wrong with working in a bar, kitchen, cleaning, stacking shelves. I have held many such jobs.

Brother the fact you don't like boring repetitive work is a sign of your twatty nature not a symptom of ADHA

Well, I feel better

I would be angry too..........and questioning how he can afford a foreign holiday if he's a single man on benefits.........

£64.30 a week does not a foreign holidays stretch to.........yes if you've got children and are very very good at budgeting (and NEVER go out) you could possibly save up for one. (as you'll get Child Benefit and CTC on top of the JSA)

But the only cash he'd get on JSA is £64.30 a week........

I am hoping he is getting a holiday paid for by his friend who is also going.

I am racked with worry about how he has got the money. A loan which he wouldn't be able to pay back, illegal activity I doubt he is not the type, he has nothing of value to sell, no savings, no car, lives in a shared house.