to stick to my guns about DD's party?

[OrmRenewed]

She's 11 in April. Last party in primary and she's worried about losing touch with her class. So she wants to make a big deal fo this party. She suggested a meal out and then sleepover. I said OK. Then she said she wanted 5 guests. I took a deep calming breath and said OK (we have no room and we basically will lose the sitting room for the night but it's OK)). All was well. Until last week she suggested that I take her and her 5 mates out to the hill for a BBQ and a general mess about in the stream etc. And then have them all back to sleep.

Now I think that is above and beyond. 5 extra DC for 24 hours. A 10 mile drive to a muddy place (with only one adult as the car is a 7-seater), followed by home (6 sets of muddy clothes and boots), food, sleepover and no sleep for anyone

So I suggested either 1. sleepover or 2. trip out followed by pizza and a DVD then everyone fucks off goes home.

But this it seems makes me some sort of modern female Herod and she went to school with a face liked a smacked arse.

Was that really such a terrible suggestion?

[Blondeshavemorefun]

meal and sleepover to me = pizza at resturant/takeaway and then home for a girly chick/bit of nail painting etc and then sleepover

[OrmRenewed]

Well she was happy to compromise first of all with numbers - only 3 guests. With that number I was prepared to do the whole kit and caboodle. Then she changed her mind and decided to ditch the bBQ. So may well change again between now and April....

We have agreed to try and arrange a BBQ afternoon at the same place open to all her class later in the summer - everyone gets themselves there or arranges lifts and brings their own food.

[spiderpig8]

How about a sleepover the night before with just a couple of best friends ,then the rest come round for hills/stream and then there parents meet them there and get their own cars muddy.

[AmericanHag]

Maybe this isn't true for your daughter, but when my friends and I were 11 we did not want younger brothers at our birthday parties. Can you make other arrangements that day/night for your sons?

You're a fab mother for agreeing to all this, btw. Your daughter will remember this fondly years from now. It took me that long to appreciate my mom's patience with sleepovers.

[EcoMouse]

How about doing a sleepover as arranged for her birthday but offering a bbq at the hill, at the end of term or as a summer get together, if farewells to close friends are playing on her mind?

[EcoMouse]

Oh, sorry, you already said that!


Good plan!

[OrmRenewed]

Thanks everyone.

AmericanHag - v pleased with 'fab mum' I normally settle for OK mum or passable mum.

we will keep the boys away from sleepover - in fact I suspect that DS#1 will arrange to invite himself to a friend's house for the night!