to have told the giel to watch her language?

[shatteredmumsrus]

Sunday moring in the park with the kids and I hear- 'come here you little twat'! I look round and see this young girl talking to her 2 yo (guess) son! COuldn't believe t. My 2 dss hear her foul mouth too and I didn't even think about it and said 'excuse me' SHe pulled her face and said 'yeah' in a real attitudey way. 'Can you watch your language please'. She gave me a filthy look and I thought I was gonna get my head kicked in, grabbed her son and 'threw' him in the buggy and he understandably started crying. It must have hurt his back or neck by the way she forcefully did it.I felt sooooo sorry for him and wanted to grab him and run away. Then she shouted to her little girl who looked around 3yo,'hurry up im gonna leave you here' and with that walked quickly out of the park and away from her little girl. The poor thing was crying and ran after her. Then her foul mouth shouts to the girl 'what the fuck do you think you were doing you little fucker'. OMG I was mortified and sat there thinking what can I do for them - nothing was the answer. No one could convince me that staying with their bio mother is the best thing for them, they should be given the chance to start a new life with a loving family.Away from this abusive, bully of a mother.If she acts like that in public what goes on behind closed doors? I hate seeing things like this and I cant get it out of my mind. Was I right to say something? Should I have done more?

Last summer my ds1 aged just 16 was attacked by a drug user mum of 3 in our local park - she was swearing her head off and went to attack a little girl ds1 stood in her way and ended up bearing the brunt of her anger - being as wed told him never to hit girls as he pushed her away he was heard to say 'sorry but get off me'.....this 'woman' was arrested and charged he was given £50 comp (which hes not seen) and she was bound over for 2 years ....she has 3 dc she frequently abuses and still social services cant do much.

Ds1 has had to have HIV testing and just had his last hepatitis c vaccination as she is a known drug injector.

done what exactly??

families like this are everywhere....people swear,its life

but she was in the park on a sunday morning....she was doing better than me!!

Nicks chick that is awful, poor DS
OP - YANBU, thos poor children, I hoep she isnt their Mum.

Bet she is their mum.
Sad but it happens every day. I've heard mothers calling their kids 'cunts' before.

How awful. Sadly, not that unusual - my Mum works in a shop in a fairly rough bit of town and she despairs at how so many Mums talk to their littles - really foul mouthed and abusive.

I absolutely hate people swearing at their children. I swear out of earshot of my DS but I would never do it in front of him and I would never call him anything like that. There is no reason or excuse for it at all.

YANBU for saying what you said. I would like to have done but I am too much of a wimp and where I live, I probably would get my head kicked in for daring to ask someone to watch their language.

Three- ' people swear, its life'. I no its life that doesnt mean to say its ok does it? Im not a saint by a long shot but to shout at a 2 year old 'come here you little twat' Its wrong. She wasnt pushing them on the swing btw, she was standing away from them on her phone having a fag!

The adrenalin was pumping - i couldnt beliee ny ears. the kids were such little, delicate looking things. I know I cant but I wish i never saw scenes like these they upset me soo much

Oh god i put giel, ha ha thats girl btw

That's a sad thing to have to witness.

well actually to you.me and plenty of others it isnt ok....but to some families,it is ok. it really IS just life!

i see lots of examples of this...lots...and it becomes more apparent as they reach teenage years.

it wasnt just what she said it was the way she said it - with venom, hate and anger as if she was talking to her boyfriend who had upset her. They were toddlers and looked scared to death

This is such a hard one . Our neighbour is the most foul mouthed revolting woman, is hideous to her kids both in terms of language and parenting. Its a really fine line between seeing it as abuse, and realising its just their way of life. Doesnt make it right, and doesnt make it right if many others live like that. But there is very little that can be done. I cringe when I hear our neighbour, and see her kids in tears as they leave the house

i wouldnt be able to deal with that. Dont forget this woman wasnt just verbally abusive - she threw him so hard in the buggy he screamed

fast forward 10-12 years and those same kids will be verbally abusing her back and perhaps chucking her around!

thats what i mean by teenage years....they will learn by her example

I know and its a terrible shame. The cycle needs to be broken!

her parents were probably the same with her,so those kids will have grandparents acting this way too!

She might well not have been Mum you know, there's a few peopel who coolect children from our school where everyone thinks its a very young mum but it turns out its their sibling.

Still not OK but teenagers can be pretty shit to siblings full stop, and at least if thats the case there may well be soemone at home mitigating it if she finds out.

I remember a story where my Nan (long gone but very- dragon like) pulling down a window as she drove past a young 'mum' from behind, tutting loudly and yelling a comment as she approached along teh lines of 'twins? that will teach you young woman'.... only to drive past and relaise to her mortification that the 'young mum' was in fact my sister on nanny work experience with her twin charges!

But if it was Mum, or anyone with regular care, its a terrible shame but whilst a loving home would be better, the care systemthey would encounter if the did not get parents would quite likely not be.

It was mum cause the little girl was crying mummy as the so called mother walkd away and left her. Horrible cow, ahhhhhhhh!

But the cycles can be broken I grew up in a home where this language,violence,drug use and other illegal things went on - I decided I wasnt going to be like that and im not,sure I still say the odd swear word but not at my dc.

I remember one red hot day walking home from town and moaning cos I was so thirsty,my mum had been in the pub(for a quick half) and left me outside with my baby sister in her pram when she came out she hadnt brough me anything at all not even a drink of water so i moaned she swore at me wacked me in the nose and dragged me up the street blood pouring.

Now I know this is wrong and im not telling you this for sympathy but some of you might know that my mum died when I was 11 and although I lived with a stepfather then he didnt want me there were several ladies in the community that helped me albeit secretly but to those ladies i will always be grateful they helped me not to be the sort of mother id had.

That's a very honest and positive post nickschick

I had a difficult upbringing.

It is partly thanks to family friends (and other things) that I am now a good enough mum to my own two.

I am not perfect, but I have insight to realise that due to my upbringing it would be easy for me to lash out/scream and swear at the dcs etc.

However I remember my own unhappiness as a child and do everything in my power (including seeking help/support) to be the best mummy that I can be.

it makes me so sad to hear of people treating their own children like this.

i am very lucky to have had a wonderful family where my sister's and my own well being and happiness really was what was important and i am lucky enough to be able to give my children the same (i hope) safe and happy upbringing.

i feel children should be able to trust their parents completely to do the right thing for them until they can make their own choices in life. behaviour like the sort described in OP is disgusting. it makes me very cross.

Onepiece it is easy to switch into what we 'knew' as children ourselves isnt it ....and it does need extra thought to be careful we dont.

Oh absolutely nickschick

Every time I manage to not overreact/shout/belittle the dcs I feel that I have developed more insight.

I also feel (and this is quite sad I think) that until I had my own dcs (in my 30s) I massively underestimated the damage (emotionally) that had been done to me.

My best friend knows most of what I went through, and she is a massive support telling me (with practical examples) that I am a good mum.

I want my dcs to be happy and secure.

My mum wasn't around full time (v long story) and I find it immensely painful to hear people say how children need their mum etc and that dd2 is a mummy's girl etc.

I cannot watch programmes (for example) where the mum leaves/dies as it just plays on my mind that this could happen to my own dds and it breaks my heart (just the thought of it)

Anyway, sorry to op for sidetracking.

btw I think the swearing is wrong but I really wouldn't intervene personally. I just think that it is more likely to inflame the mother and she will take it out further on the dcs (which is what happened)

onepieceoflollipop I know exactly where your coming from .