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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel sad at ds turning 4 tommorrow, not a baby anymore.

21 replies

darkandstormy · 07/03/2010 18:24

I have felt really quite depressed today as my ds will be 4 tommorrow.Feels like it has gone too quick.I used to pour scorn on these type of threads in the past [sorry], but now I understand what other posters have mean't.I will never have another toddler in my life. Don,t get me wrong, I have done my more than fair share of being fed up with tantrums nappies etc over the years.Perhaps I should just crack open the white and wrap the megatron[yuk] he so wanted.Anyone got any wise words to zap me out of my melancholy state. thanks.

OP posts:
choufleur · 07/03/2010 18:27

A little. You shouldn't be sad, a bit wistful maybe but not sad that he's growing up. You'll never have anything that's already gone again but think of all of the other wonderful things that you have to look forward to.

cissycharlton · 07/03/2010 18:29

Happy birthday to your ds. My ds2 turns 4 tomorrow as well.

I can totally understand where you are coming from but I've an older ds as well and believe me, it gets better and better.

You'll have so much enjoyment watching him develop and become interested in cars/football whatever. We've spent the day watching ds1 playing sport and nothing beats the joy of watching your lovely son score a goal or try for his team.

Boys never seem to lose their affection either. Ds1 is just as cuddly as ds2.

Have a great day tomorrow.

Original poster
darkandstormy · 07/03/2010 18:32

thanks chofleur that has already cheered me.It is weird because I usually I am not like this,it is funny how these feelings can sometimes grab you.I should count my blessings I have dd7 and ds 4 tommorrow.

OP posts:
Original poster
darkandstormy · 07/03/2010 18:33

cissy thank you you and your boys have a great day too. big birthday kisses.

OP posts:
lolapoppins · 07/03/2010 18:37

I feel like that every year!

My lovely ds was 7 a few months ago and I cried buckets yet again! But (get the sick bag) he will always be my baby. He is my only child though, which makes it worse.

TheMysticMasseuse · 07/03/2010 18:37

my dd just turned 4 and recently I looked at her and realised there's nothing of the baby left in her. she's a person now, with her own ideas- whcih she is able to articulate surprisingly well, theories, insights and plans. SHe is someone I don't know and every day I am more fascinated by the person she is becoming.

She was a difficult baby and a difficult toddler and I feel like she's finally blossoming and making it easy to love her.

Of course I always loved her, but now I feel I am falling in love with her- iyswim.

Perhaps write down your favourite memories of him as a baby/toddler in an album, so you don't forget? I find I have lost so many of those precious moments whcih i thought I never would

cissycharlton · 07/03/2010 18:37
Smile
TheBolter · 07/03/2010 18:44

My dd has just turned six and I am amazed at how grown up she has suddenly become. I agree with TheMysticMasseuse (great name ), my dd was also a difficult baby and toddler but I am having so much fun with her now. Even though I've always loved her it took me a while to fall in love with her too.

They do become such fun as they get older, really I've never been happier. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm ready to totally ready to move on from the toddler years and do feel a bit sad when I think about it, but I wouldn't want to go back to it when I'm having such a lovely time with my 4 and 6 year old girls now.

seeker · 07/03/2010 18:46

I am gazing soppily at my 14 year old as I type. She is fabulous - but I still miss the 4 year old her. And the 5 year old her, the 7 year old her - even the her she was yesterday! But I am looking forward to the her she will be tomorrow.

Megatron · 07/03/2010 18:50

I totally understand where you're coming from! My DS has just turned six and he just seems so, well, BIG. He was an adorable baby, gorgeous toddler and now he's saying things every day that make me laugh my head off. I write them down sometimes (does that make me tragic?) but I don't want to forget the silly wee things that brighten the day. Don't be sad though, your DS is just moving on to the next stage of his life and so are you. (mine too is obsessed with Megatron, as you will guess by my name!)

choufleur · 07/03/2010 18:54

poem i like about children.

Original poster
darkandstormy · 07/03/2010 19:04

choufleur thanks that is brilliant, have never seen that before. It is weird I am so shocked at my emotional state today.I should be feeling so happy which of course I am blub blub now where is that megatron.Of course you then worry about babying theyoungest and going one extreme to the other.Being a mum is no doubt about it an emotional rollercoaster at times.

OP posts:
choufleur · 07/03/2010 19:17

I got all wobbly the other day about ds starting school in september (he's 4 next month). it's silly isn't it but just part and parcel of motherhood i guess.

pranma · 07/03/2010 21:38

My 35yr old dd is my baby but please dont tell her.Her ds2 just started to walk at 11 months and she was regretting the tiny baby stage.My mum always said,'you'll always be a bairn to me' and I was 48 when she died!!!
One day you'll have grandbabies and off you'll go again.

BikeRunSki · 07/03/2010 21:52

I felt like that when I was shpooing for clothes for DS (1 and only; 18 months) last week and realised that as far as clothes shops are concerned, he is no lonhger a baby, but is officially a toddler.

doesntplaywellwithothers · 08/03/2010 08:52

This is so sweet!! My ds turns 4 in June, and I'm a bit wobbly about that, too...
I will say though that though he was a sweet and gorgeous baby and toddler...he's such a neat little kid, and so funny...I just really appreciate that he and I can joke and have real conversation. So, I will miss my baby, too...but I am stupidly in love with this little boy!!

sparkle09 · 08/03/2010 09:02

happy birthday to your DS OP, MY ds turned 6 a few weeks ago and i found it really hard. like someone else said, its like hes all of a sudden become really grown up,

he can pretty much now do most thing himself, and doesnt really need me much, apart from he is still really affectionate, where as my DD aged 2 is already finding kisses to be disgusting. lol .

bernadetteoflourdes · 08/03/2010 09:06

I get you totally darkandstormy and could not quite understand my dsil willing them to grow up real fast so she"could get her life back" as the old saying goes. children are only lent to us until they are 18 so we should enjoy every mo as time goes by real fast. But on the upside I think ds improves each year. He got up early this morning and got all his uniform on and then popped into my bed for a cuddle as he says he was freezing. Golden moment #1 of the day really.

Original poster
darkandstormy · 08/03/2010 09:48

its funny bernadette because I used to actually be like your dsil, however something has just changed I now am so depressed about the fact I will not have the baby days again.still as everyone has said there are lovely things to look forward to.I am lucky to have 2 dc.

OP posts:
bernadetteoflourdes · 08/03/2010 09:55

you said it in one DarkandStormy thats the joy of motherhood ad HAPPY BIRTHDAY to your ds btw xxx

Lizzylou · 08/03/2010 09:59

Happy Birthday to your DS, I was exactly the same last week when my DS2 turned 4.
Suddenly I realised the baby/toddler years were behind us and then we got his school placement acceptance thingy and I did weep....

I love Seeker's post about missing the past child but also looking forward to "meeting" what they will become.

Off to get some tissues now...

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