fecking snoring

[mumofaboy]

Sorry this is a long rant but I'm sleep deprived and cross.

some background - DH and I take turns to see to 1yo DS at night and get up with him in the morning. When it's DH's turn I sometimes sleep in the spare room (I can't sleep through DS making any noise), and this also takes the pressure off DH to get up with him as soon as he fusses. (NB no chance of the spare room becoming DS's room just now for various reasons).

When it's my turn we all sleep in the same room as DH finds it easy to tune him out when it's not his turn. This would all be fine is it wasn't for one thing - DH's snoring.

DH is in a bit of a mood anyway as he wanted to spend all day today doing his hobby - he'd told me the morning only so when he said he'd be home at 4.30 this pm I was a bit . He pointed out he has DS all day tomorrow - yes, because I'm starting a new job!! It's not like I'm going out on the razz all day.

Anyway, last night it was my turn - we went to bed at 11. DH immediately starts snoring. This wakes DS who starts fussing. I got him into our bed to settle him (this is often quicker and easier than getting up continually and DH does it too), and then I laid awake until 1.30am listening to DH. DS then wakes at 5.45 (after being a bit restless all night) - it's little early for him so I decide to see if he'll drop back off. He tries to give DH a cuddle and headbutts him on the nose (ok, I know that must've hurt but he didn't mean it!). He then comes back to me. I'm just laying there psyching myself to get up (I'm knackered and it's cold), when DH demands that I take him out. He's only been awake a few minutes, it's not like I was lying there for an hour, and once we get up DH is free to lie in as long as he wants today as agreed.

Now I know it was my turn, but AIBU to expect that if we are taking turns, in the interest of getting more sleep he could at least try and do something about his snoring? I've asked him to try those nasal strips and he refused. He grumped that he's got him tonight - yes, but I'll be sleeping on a bloody uncomfortable futon to try and escape your snoring while you sleep in our massive king sized bed. And if DS wakes he'll have a whole side of the bed to kip in rather than being squished up against me and kicking me in the face. And when it's my turn I have to get up straight away so DS doesn't wake DH, whereas DH can afford to lie in bed for a bit to see if he'll settle again by himself.

I feel like we've got a pretty good system in place to avoid either of us becoming too sleep-deprived but the snoring is just tipping the scales too far - it's causing me to lose whole hours of sleep. We're talking about having another baby but this is actually starting to put me off.

Sorry for the rant I'm just fed up.

You have my every sympathy mumofaboy.

Here is a link to a company who sells excellent ear plugs and they actually do work. link. I was tempted to shove them up my dh's nose when shaking his shoulder or kicking nudging his feet did not work.

Has your dh put on a bit of extra weight? This can make the snoring worse due to extra fat in the neck.
It may be advisable for him to speak with his GP as sleep apnoea can lead to a higher risk of heart attack etc. (Not to mention how awful sleep deprivation is leaving a toll on you).

I hope you can get some rest when it is your dh's turn and it would do no harm to insist that he and your son slept in the spare room for a couple of nights. You may have to be quite firm about this.

The nose strips don't work! We tried.

If your dh is snoring so loud that he is waking a toddler, he needs to see his GP about it - there are a few things they can do. My dh did this as we were worried he had Sleep Aponea (he didn't) and the 2 days in hospital at night for sleep tests were amazing! No snoring!!

Have to admit we have got round the snoring by him being away 3 nights a week at work so I get good sleeps then.

Losing weight has made no difference to dh. It seems to run in the family - his Mum is worse than he is and his brother has sleep aponea.

i'm going to chat to him today. He is quite a big guy so that probably doesn't help. I've used earplugs before but of course then i can't hear DS! Aarrgh.

My dh has recently lost over a stone in weight - once he hit the stone reduction he stopped snoring....immediately. Life is much easier for us both!!

You don't need to hear your ds when it is your turn to have a sleep.

but the problem is on the nights i'm meant to hear ds - when it's not my turn i can sleep in other room, use earplugs etc. But when it's my turn i'm subjected to the horrible drilling snore that leaves me unduly tired. I'm going to have to get dh to go in the spare room when it's my turn but i know he'll get the hump.

Sorry! A bit slow today due to this very problem.
Your dh will get over having the hump, needs must and all that plus it would not be for very long.

thanks pumphrey. it's nice to know it isn't just me (not that i'm glad you're in the same predicament!)

YANBU

Maybe invest in a slightly more comfy bed for the spare room or some pillows, or something to make sleeping in there a more appealing prospect? Then it'll be nicer for you when you sleep in there and nicer for your DH (so he'll be less likely to take the hump?) if you ask him to sleep in there on nights when you could really do without his snoring?

I really sympathise - my DH has bad sinuses and every now and then he'll have a terrible cold and the snoring is chronic. I listen to an audiobook on my earphones until I drop off, and then the snoring doesn't bother me and usually, during the night, the earphones fall off anyway - maybe you could try something like that as well? Audiobooks, relaxation cds, podcasts, music etc all good distractions to help block out the dreaded snoring!!!