or should we be telling our children they are forgiving

[deliakate]

Not sure whether there are many here who are fans of the whole time out/naughty step thing, and I'm not sure whether I will ever use it. But it seems from what I've seen that the last step of the process is that the child says sorry for what they did.

Perhaps its seen as implicit that the parent then hugs the child and forgives then internally. But I was thinking perhaps it should also be said in words- "I forgive you, darling".

What do others think? Does saying "its ok" count as the same thing, or does it seem a good idea to name and illustrate the concept of forgiveness to a child?

I think you are over analysing, how old are your children?

I'm musing really. I just like the concept, so think I will use the word with DS. He's tiny right now.

I say I forgive you and when I have done something crap and apologised to DS (aged 4) for it, he forgives me. I like it.

We always say "thank you for saying sorry" - think that it is important to acknowlege it.

I like insertexpletive's option better.

DS is still young enough for me to naively hope I won't need to us the naughty step .

I've been wondering what jars with me about 'I forgive you'

I think it's because it carries I think a tone of blame and implies that the child has been deliberately mean or cruel or something. Even if they seem to have done a naughty thing deliberately, this still does not warrant being forgiven I think because thy are children and need time and space to learn about behaviour. We don't need to forgive childishness as if it's a deliberate crime!
I don't think they need 'forgiving' - they are learning and finding out about boundaries, they just need a consequence and that's it

I agree that thanking them for saying sorry sounds more appropriate to me