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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask about glasses? yes off the back of another thread but im curious now!

67 replies

BritFish · 02/03/2010 19:07

i wear glasses, and the other thread [about OP feeling smug about her friend's child having to wear glasses]
made me wonder, do people see needing glasses as some sort of impediment?
okay um...sort of...on par with a lisp or hearing problems?

not explaining myself very well.
but i never saw wearing glasses as a 'problem'
and i dont get why people get so het up about the fact they need glasses either. fair enough if you dont suit them/prefer contacts etc, but some people get so worked up!

disclaimer: this of course not about people who can barely see at all or blind.

OP posts:
Coldhands · 02/03/2010 19:14

I saw that other thread. Apparently someone got into the 'OP' account and posted that, and it was made up.

To answer your question, I wear glasses and have done since I was 10. I have never saw it as an impediment. I always wanted glasses as I wanted to look different. Of course now my eyesight is appalling and it would be nice not to wear them but I like them. I also tend to go for men in glasses too.

I think people who have an issue with it are vain. My cousin didn't have his contacts for a while but he refused to wear his glasses even though his eyesight was awful. It was a vanity issue. I have known a few people who wear lenses who would rather not see than wear glasses as they don't like the look. I thought we were way past the time when it was 'not accepted' (IYKWIM) to wear glasses.

piscesmoon · 02/03/2010 19:17

I posted on the other one to say that I have nearly always worn glasses or contact lenses and I had no idea I was to be pitied or that it meant my mother might be upset that I wasn't perfect! I would assume the person who started the other thread sees a child as an accessory-most strange!!

sarah293 · 02/03/2010 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Caitni · 02/03/2010 19:19

I don't particularly like wearing my glasses - it's not vanity, more that I don't like my field of vision being framed IYKWIM. So I wear my contacts as I like having peripheral vision! Having said that, I'll wear my glasses at some point most days. And my DH hates wearing contacts, way prefers his glasses and wears them every day (and I love them on him!).

Definitely don't see it as an impediment at all. That other thread is

Original poster
BritFish · 02/03/2010 19:20

i know people like that too
i dont like how i look without glasses particularly, but i NEED to see so wearing contacts wouldnt be a problem [for an example of it being the other way round]
as was said on the other thread, she said she was upset when she learnt her own DS needed glasses.
why?
ive worn glasses since i was 4, and many of my friends do, and none of them have ever been bullied for wearing them, which is the only reason i can think of to object to your child wearing glasses!
and the only other alternative is um...not being able to see.

i feel very sorry for any kids whos parents feel this way!

OP posts:
BrahmsThirdRacket · 02/03/2010 19:21

I wear glasses (sometimes contacts) and most of the time it doesn't bother me, but occasionally I feel 'impaired'. But I know it's a minor deal compared to most impairments. I would love to have 20/20 vision.

MrsC2010 · 02/03/2010 19:22

I have a few friends who just wouldn't look the same without their glasses, they've tried contacts and they just don't look right!

nickytwotimes · 02/03/2010 19:22

I wear glasses and contacts.

I also prefer the cntacts as my glasses cut off bits of my vision and get steamed up in th ewinter or when I am in the kitchen. I also find I feel a bit spaced out or detached fromthings in my specs. I do suit my specs if we are talking vanity though, especially with hair up.

I love the look of glasses.

MrsJohnDeere · 02/03/2010 19:27

I've worn glasses all the time since the age of 7. I hated it at first (but had those really ugly NHS specs), but soon grew used to it. I like wearing them now - feel naked without them. Contacts have never been an option for me because my astigmatism is too severe, or something.

PersonalClown · 02/03/2010 19:28

I wear contacts. I didn't need them till I was about 23 and didn't think anything of it.
I just have contacts because at the time DS would have kept pulling at my glasses and break them so contacts were the logical option.

I'm looking at a nice pair of statement glasses for when I'm in the mood to show them off a bit.

BouncingTurtle · 02/03/2010 19:28

'I think people who have an issue with it are vain.'

That is a pretty fucking big assumption

I have been wearing glasses since I was 7 years old (shortsighted and severe astigmatism) and it was one of the ways I was singled out for bullying at school.

I still hate wearing them, though I don't not wear them - they go on my face as soon as I get out of bed, and are the last thing I take off at night. Tried contacts twice and could not get on with toric lenses, they were are nightmare, and laser surgery is not an option as my prescription still isn't stable, and my astigmatism index in one eye is quite high.

I find them an annoyance, even though I have been wearing them for 27 years! Just little niggling things, like the way they go foggy when I walk into a warm room, or how it is difficult to use a microscope or telescope (I did a degree in Chemistry with Astronomy).
It seems really petty on the face of it, and I certainly would not go as far as to say they impeded my quality of life, far from it, but it is a constant source of irritation. And they can be bloody expensive!

Good job I didn't see the other thread, what a thoroughly unpleasant person she sounds.

fruitshootsandheaves · 02/03/2010 19:29

I have worn glasses since I was about 9. I got badly bullied at school as I had the awful NHS plastic framed ones, so I stopped wearing them and then got bullied more for copying my friends work as I couldn't see the blackboard..

My DD wears glasses but they are so much more fashionable and accepted now. As soon as i have the money I am going to have laser surgery.

I would love to go swimming with the DC's and to be able to see them and I hate all the steaming up and smeary lenses.

TheCrackFox · 02/03/2010 19:29

I wear glasses and contacts. TBh contacts are far more practical especially on cold rainy days.

I count myself lucky that I live in a country where glasses are affordable(ish)/available.

Hulababy · 02/03/2010 19:29

I wear contact lenses. I have needed glasses since I was a child. Even then I hated them and would do anything to avoid wearing them, and for the first few years of being with DH he didnt even know I needed them. I eventually got contacts at 21y and haven't looked back. I do have glasses but wear them maybe half a dozen times a year.

How would I feel if DD had to wear glasses? Hmmm. I think at some point it is likely she will have to. I guess I would prefer it if she didn't have too. I would prefer to not have the need. I hate waking up in the night and not being able to see properly - think it would be ncer for DD if she didn't have that feeling.

I don't worry about it on a "prettiness" type issue though.

PrettyCandles · 02/03/2010 19:30

Both dh and I wear glasses, and both our elder dc longed for the day when they could as well! A much better attitude, IMO, than my embarrasment at having to start wearing them age 10. Perhaps it's because I have worn glasses for most of my life, but it never occurred to me that glasses-wearers might be deliberately discriminated against.

TBH the only discrimination I feel that I come across, is when I browse pictures looking for a new hairstyle, and none of the models ever wears glasses.

The only discrimination...well, judgey-pants attitude, really, that I would find myself feeling against a glasses-wearer, would be if it was obvious that they didn't choose the glasses to suit their face and didn't clean them, etc. Just the same as I would be a bit judgey about a person who was a smelly slob in other respects.

pointydog · 02/03/2010 19:31

specs can be fun. As dd2 said, she loves wearing specs someof the time but she'd hate to wear them all the time.

It's fun to pose about, popping them on then off again. It's a little irritating to be permenantly speccy.

gherkinwithapurplemerkin · 02/03/2010 19:32

Britfish - I wear contacts. Oh, and hearing aids. I do not consider myself "impeded". I'd prefer it if other people don't either.

ChickensHaveSinisterMotives · 02/03/2010 19:36

I have worn glasses since I was a toddler. For me, my eyesight is a real impediment, so I have to wear my glasses to function normally. I have extremely blurred vision without. My latest pair of specs are very distorting, and it does get me down. I think whether you see it as a problem will often depend on the prescription you have to wear.

DorotheaPlenticlew · 02/03/2010 19:38

I have always had perfect vision and so has DP. So far DS seems fine too although we make no assumptions as most of the rest of our families wear glasses (my dad is legally blind w/out his).

But I have never, ever considered that it was some sort of "impediment" to have glasses! I just see it as one less thing I've had to worry about so far in terms of expense, style, etc., but if I need 'em in future I won't mind at all. And if DS needs 'em I won't regard him as any less perfect than I presently do

EggyAllenPoe · 02/03/2010 19:40

i don't consider it an impediment, though perhaps inconvenience is a better word.

certainy the time my glasses blew twebty feet away into the gutter, and i couldn't find them, that was inconvenient.

similarly when DD gets to them before i do.

i can wear contacts though i choose not to most of the time because my eyes get sore, and the cost of daily disposables. i would prefer perfect vision, but its no biggy.

chocices · 02/03/2010 19:48

My ds has worn glasses since he was 2. I've been asked many times by different people over the last 3 years - are you sad/disappointed that your ds has to wear glasses?

I can honestly say no. He needs something to help him partake fully in the world, I will always give him whatever he needs to obtain his full potential same with glasses. He's not bothered, and if kids ask him why he wears them, he says because they make my eyes better, and i can play football so much better.

MamaVoo · 02/03/2010 20:01

I worked in a children's eye clinic for many years and there are definitely people who delay getting their child glasses because they don't like the idea of it. Then they will be asking about contact lenses even if the child is really young, or trying to push an older child into trying lenses when they don't want to. Anything not to have a child of theirs less than 'perfect'.

ChickensHaveSinisterMotives · 02/03/2010 20:04

TBH, I was upset when DS2 had to have glasses. It was more distress at the thought that I had passed down my crappy eyesight rather than upset about him being 'flawed' in some way, IYSWIM. He is fine with his specs, and NHS glasses are a lot better than they used to be.

Morloth · 02/03/2010 20:07

Have worn glasses since about 6. TBH I haven't noticed them for years and years and years. Sometimes I wear contacts if the mood takes me.

DS gets his eyes checked regularly, will be a small hassle if he needs glasses but only until he is able to look after them himself.

Poor DH though has only started needing them in the last year or so and he isn't used to them yet, they keep getting steamed up when he opens oven/dishwasher whatever because he hasn't learned to take them into account yet.

Lucyellensmumma · 02/03/2010 20:07

I posted on the other thread, it was only about three posts in that i realise that i have glasses. So it clearly doesn't bother me - DD1 has glasses, she is 19 she was well happy when she needed them at about 14 (but im less than happy as she has cost me a fortune in designer frames ). Not had DD1s eyes tested yet, she is four - the only problem i would have if she needed glasses would be keeping them on her face