To feel upset at GP?

[carrierchc]

Had my 6 week check today after having DD3.Her delivery was quite horrible,I pushed for 3 hours then had forceps,basically horrid Dr made me feel really lazy and told me it was not her job to deliver my baby with forceps because I did not feel like pushing it out ( I was exhausted by this point!) So I felt crap and a bit useless.

Anyway GP today said "So you've had THREE forceps deliveries and three big episiotomies, that's not a great result is it?Most people manage to deliver normally after a first forceps delivery!"

I now feel like some sort of childbirth failure! Am probably being sensitive I know.

"poor maternal effort" is a horrible term.

Thing is, you can only push as much as your contraction lets you. Ever tried to push with no contraction? No point, you just get tired. Same with ineffective contractions. If you are needing to be told to push, you are either numb (drugs) or don't need to.

Definitely get a debrief if you can. I didn't get one after DD's (awful and terrifying) birth, but I had one while pg with DS2 about DS1's birth, and it really helped me.

OMG I am gobsmacked!! which is what incidentally i think the doctor should have been!

YANBU!!! AT ALL!!!

Its its any consolation I read on my notes that the reason I had a ventouse was "poor pushing effort from mother" ha fucking ha

Have just seen that TeamEdward had the same

anyway, they have been hugely insensitive, so read answers here and tell them to fxxk off next time (or words to that effect)

OMG cant ebelive there are 3 of us with poor maternal effort marks! thought it was just me that was shite at childbirth!!!

carrie, you are not alone....

You mean that people can actually write 'poor maternal effort' on your notes? I am absolutely

Someone should have grabbed the notes off them and written 'due to crap medical attention'

Isn't an android pelvis like a really big deal and mean it's impossible for you to give birth normally???? i would have said 'i'm so bad at motherhood i don't know what possessed me to do it three times. what's your excuse for continuing in this job?'

What crappy treatment you have received OP

I'm with JollyPirate you've probably got a non-easy birthing shaped pelvis.

3 hours of pushing your 3rd really kind of indicates that there was a physical issue, dc3 & 4 only took 1 push for the body each and they were big babies, it wasn't me pushing it was my body doing it.

I think you need a medal for not decking the dr who delivered and your gp.

I meant 1 push for the head and then 1 for the body

Yanbu.

It's down to luck.

I have also found some women to be extremely insensitive if they have never experienced difficult births. Just as many as men.