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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feeding my DD's friend this.......

35 replies

trickyricki · 19/02/2010 16:56

Earlier today I took my DD and her friend into town. Her mum told me she was a very fussy eater and would only eat plain pasta and doesn't like processed food. After about an hour they were both complaining of being hungry and the choice of eating places were either starbucks or Mcdonalds. I didn't fancy spending £3.75 on a sandwich fr each of us so we went to Mcdonalds.

My DD's friend was so excited because she'd never had MCDONALDS before i gave her the option of fish fingers and carrot sticks but she wanted cheese burger, chips and a fruit shoot like my DD. She enjoyed it so much she finished off my DD's burger that she left.

I did consider phoning her mum to check it was ok but she's one of those pushy parents who'd cause a fuss. Also I've never seen a child so excited about going to Mcdonalds and for me to tell her she couldn't have it would have made me seemed even more cruel.

AIBU?

OP posts:
DebiNewberry · 19/02/2010 16:58

i love half term.

JustMoon · 19/02/2010 16:59

YABU you should have let her have a big mac and large chips with a chocolate covered doughnut for pud.

I take it this is a joke?

gingernutlover · 19/02/2010 16:59

she didnt say you couldnt take her there did she?

I wouldnt care less personally, my dd is 4 and has "old macdonalds" as she calls it probably once every couple of months on average.

Ziggurat · 19/02/2010 17:02

I would probably have taken them to Starbucks and been done with it - under the assumption that there was simply no way that this wouldn't come out eventually with the girl's parents.

Are you going to swear her to secrecy, or is it inevitable that she going to excitedly tell Mum and Dad what she got up to, and her yummy lunch?

I would be too worried that exactly that would happen, that it wouldn't be worth the few pounds saved.

Clearly the girl loves processed food - it's just her Mum who doesn't want her to eat it (which is fair enough).

Original poster
trickyricki · 19/02/2010 17:02

Thanks i didn't think too much of it until my DH said he disagreed!

OP posts:
Indaba · 19/02/2010 17:03

Nope. You were looking after someones child.....suited you at the time. We never ever,ever eat at MacDonalds, nor KFC etc etc but I recognise if my child is being looked after by someone elses mum, then I have to be flexible. Were the child vegetarian or came from a vegetarian family or you had specifically been told not to eat there then its a different matter. But to my mind, the parent should be grateful for you taking their child out.

Ziggurat · 19/02/2010 17:05

Hmm, true - she didn't say you couldn't take her anywhere specific, she just said the child didn't like processed food.

I am such a law-abider though, that I just wouldn't have taken the risk, but that says more about me...

Original poster
trickyricki · 19/02/2010 17:06

I haven't sworn her to secrecy so if her mum finds out so be it!

OP posts:
Original poster
trickyricki · 19/02/2010 17:09

Well I know she never let her daughter go to a pizza hut party so it's obvious they don't eat fast food but she didn't actually specify this to me.

OP posts:
PixieOnaLeaf · 19/02/2010 17:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

missismac · 19/02/2010 17:11

Nope you definitely are not BU. If I leave my kids with other parents then it's up to them what they feed them. I wouldn't dream of imposing my own preferences on them - it would be rude. They're doing me the favour of having my kids, & they're paying!

Why on earth would the OP consider swearing the friend to secrecy? Surely no-one is so controlling that they would take offense at their child being 'treated' to some processed food under those circumstances?

OtterInaSkoda · 19/02/2010 17:11

She'll be on here with "AIBU to be fucking furious with other parent feeding my dd shite?". Mark my words

MrsPixie · 19/02/2010 17:12

She was in your care and didn't make any specific dietary requirements so your call totally.

I wouldn't have minded for my DD as it would not be the norm for us anyway.

usualsuspect · 19/02/2010 17:12

Why do these threads always make me crave a Big Mac...

OtterInaSkoda · 19/02/2010 17:12

BTW wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest. But YABU as you knew she hadn't allowed her dd to go to Pizza Hut (presumeably she objects to fast food or something)

heQet · 19/02/2010 17:13

Well, you weren't given any instructions, were you? So you didn't go against anything. If she calls you about it, you can say "You never told me you objected to mcdonalds. How would I have known that?"

Original poster
trickyricki · 19/02/2010 17:13

Exactly, I wouldn't have thought twice about it but since coming on mumsnet I've met some strange characters!

OP posts:
Ziggurat · 19/02/2010 17:16

See, I'm just super-paranoid and would be quivering in my boots about getting a telling off from militant-Mum - but again, that says more about me...

monkeyfeathers · 19/02/2010 17:16

Maybe the pizza hut party clashed with her granny's birthday so she couldn't go. How do you know an aversion to fast food was the reason?

As for the original question: who cares? It's one crappy meal out of a lifetime. If there are no specific dietry requirements, then there's no issue.

elliedodger · 19/02/2010 17:18

Considering that the alternative was Starbucks then i don't think it's a problem. There's probably just as much fat in the cheese laden paninis as there is in a McDonalds meal. I think McDonalds gets scapegoated a little bit and other chains get let off the hook because they're a bit more trendy. A lot of the drinks in Starbucks have more calories in them than a meal!

If the girl's mother was dead against fast food then she should've specified this.

GhoulsAreLoud · 19/02/2010 17:19

Personally, I think it is really important for children to have a balanced approach to food, and to me that includes having the occasional junk food outing.

I think it is far far worse to be so strict with children's food that they end up in situations where the food they are allowed or not allowed controls their lives - e.g. missing out on a pizza party or having to eat carrot sticks when their friend is having a big mac.

That's just me though, but really I think you did her a favour, if anything.

You weren't told not to take her there, no problem I reckon. Anyway the paninis and things in Starbucks are full of salt and fat too.

2shoes · 19/02/2010 17:21

yanbu
sounds like the dd loved it

GhoulsAreLoud · 19/02/2010 17:22

I fancy a McDonalds now too. Have never had a Big Mac, might be time to try one.

fedupofthis · 19/02/2010 17:27

My DD has Mcdonalds twice even three times a month, I don't see what the big deal is?

twotimes · 19/02/2010 17:39

yanbu but I'll be looking out for the AIBU thread from her mom on here later