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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to want to do a parenting skills course already?

15 replies

deliakate · 15/02/2010 16:05

More to the point, if I approach Dr, social services or whoever about doing one, are they going to think I can't cope and try to patronise me to death?
DS is only 6 months old, but I want to get the building blocks for keeping him within firm but fair boundaries going now. Already, if he is ever super-shouty, or a bit willful, I feel myself freeze and just look at him like I'm scared of him or something. I'm sure he's going to pick up on this soon, so I would like to get some support with getting that confidence to deal swiftly with 'unasseptable' behaviour (as Jo Frost would put it) and not to feel like a fish out of water.
Does anyone know where I could do something like this/ who I should approach to ask?

OP posts:
Cyb · 15/02/2010 16:06

Health Visitor
family Support Worker
Local Childrens Centre if you ahve one

ImSoNotTelling · 15/02/2010 16:13

cybs suggestions good or books.

Be careful how you phrase your question to them to avoid patronising etc!

Itsjustafleshwound · 15/02/2010 16:13

Sure Start centre
Local LIbrary and listing guide

ImSoNotTelling · 15/02/2010 16:14

Do you have any good friends who you think have good way with their children? Ask them how/what they do.

ChairmumMiaow · 15/02/2010 16:15

our childrens centre runs them

Triggles · 16/02/2010 10:55

I don't think it's an issue to go to a parenting class prior to problems arising. I went to a parenting class just before DD hit her teenage years, as I wanted to get some good hints and tips on how to handle potential problem areas before I reached them. It was very helpful and I don't regret it at all. I personally think that it shows good sense to want to get a jump start of what to expect and how to handle it.

shockers · 16/02/2010 11:01

To do it now is pro-active parenting.... don't see how they could have a problem with that!
I've been on one. I enjoyed it and picked up some good tips.

junkcollector · 16/02/2010 11:14

Why don't you try reading some parenting books first then if there are issues you would like to follow up on see about parenting classes. I found 'Raising Boys' by Steve Biddulph useful (and quick to read).

The thing about Jo Frost is that she goes in when a family is in crisis and have really let things get out of control.

Having a set of 'principles' (can just keep them vague obviously) which you adhere to is a useful thing. This goes for us as well as them.

My principles are in general:

No violence (ever)
Respect each other.
I will always listen to them (except when they're blathering on about lego models )
They will listen to me (one day.......).
They will be road aware
I do not understand whinging.

There are probably more but can't think of them.

I generally then make up punishments on the spot depending on what they've done.

junkcollector · 16/02/2010 11:15

By 'Us' I meant me and DH not Me and you (in a really patronising way!)

tethersend · 16/02/2010 11:16

If you'd just got a job as a nanny or childcare worker, you'd want some training- it would be expected!

Good luck with everything; the fact that you are thinking about it at all is a sign you're a good parent IMO.

AmesBS7 · 16/02/2010 11:25

For books, try 'Playful Parenting' and the Sears 'Good Behaviour Book' for nice friendly discipline styles.
Re courses, be confident of your own reasons for wanting to do one and don't let anyone read anything into it that is not there - it's a fab thing to want to do!

deliakate · 16/02/2010 14:45

Thank you everyone. Shockers, whereabouts did you do your course?

OP posts:
parakeet · 16/02/2010 16:46

I cannot recommend the book Toddler Taming by Christopher Green highly enough.

fernie3 · 16/02/2010 16:49

the surestart centre by us does them and I used them when my second was born. It helped ALOT. Also various parenting type charities do them so might be worth searching in your area for some. I think they are a great idea for everyone and before any problems occur is the best time, it is much harder to change things once they are going wrong.

shockers · 18/02/2010 12:33

At our local family centre. I met some nice mums too!

I like "Raising Boys" too Junk. I was initially shocked at the reference to testosterone so early on but it explains an awful lot!

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