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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

neighbour complaining about noise

25 replies

peacelover · 15/02/2010 14:56

Firstly, I'll say hi to everyone as this is my first post!

Anyway, I'm having major problems with my downstairs neighbour who seems to like complaining. Since we first moved in 2 years ago, she has been at our door regularly about a noise "like a dehumidifier" which starts at 7am every morning and apparently keeps her awake. She even came up at half past midnight the night before my first final exam at uni to say that she could hear this noise. My partner tried calling her bluff and told her to come in and check for a dehumidifier if she didn't believe him (she then barged past him to check our kitchen!!!!!). She has since realised that it is the basement neighbour who owns this dehumidifier and left us alone (for a few weeks).

She has recently decided that our washing machine and tumble drier are too loud and now comes up to complain every time I switch them on. I don't do any washing before 9am or have the washing finish after 9pm and am not some kind of washing maniac so I don't know how best to deal with this. I'm actually worrying every time I hoover or put the washing on now. I know she works from home and is an artist so noise must be difficult for her but I can't keep on living like this! She is also incredibly interfering and likes telling me off presumably because I'm younger as no other neighbours receive this hassle! How do I deal? I know she's friends with the landlord who lives abroad so I'm scared of her badmouthing me. Thanks!

OP posts:

sparechange · 15/02/2010 15:03

Have you asked her what she wants you to do?

She can't reasonably ask you not to use your washing machine, and I presume it isn't a really, really noisy one which should probably be replaced and it jumping all over the floor?

Do you have a plumber friend who could take a very quick look at it, so you can say you've asked a plumber to inspect it and it is fine and normal and doesn't make any unusual noise?

I suspect she'll soon find something else to moan about, maybe she just likes to complain!

atworknotworking · 15/02/2010 15:04

Am I right in thinking that you live in a flat or apartment block? if that is the case their are quite strict regulations on soundproofing, if this woman starts complaining about a washing machine then sounproofing probably isn't so great, can you hear anyones domestic appliances?. she is probably a grumpy bag, either way if she does get in touch with the landlord I doubt their is a great deal he could do I've never heard of anyone being evicted for putting a washing machine on, and if it is making a disturbance then turn it back onto landlord and say what are you going to do to soundproof.

Try posting in property, their are some very knowledgeable MNetters who could help re regs.

minouminou · 15/02/2010 15:05

Start taking notes about her complaints in front of her and get her to sign them...remember to include time and date.
Don't tell her why you're doing this. Then when you've got a few, take them along to a free half-hour solicitor session and see what they reckon.
She shouldn't be doing this.

wishingchair · 15/02/2010 15:15

Yes, it doesn't sound like the issue is with you ... perfectly reasonable to use a washing machine/dryer during the day ... but with the sound proofing of the flats. That is the landlords problem not yours. I suggest getting her to sign the complaints and together forward them on to the landlord. Might be interesting given they're friends!

minouminou · 15/02/2010 15:16

Yep....I bet she'll back off.

AccioPinotGrigio · 15/02/2010 15:19

How old is she? As we age we become more sensitive to low frequency noise. Noises that wouldn't register with younger people. The issue with the humidifier fits this bill. It might be that the other sounds do too. I'm not sure how that info will help you though. Sorry!

I think she is being unreasonable and you should probably check your tenancy agreement for any clauses about noise - when you can put your washing machine on etc - and then make sure you aren't breaching the terms of the agreement. If you aren't then there isn't much she can do.

thedollshouse · 15/02/2010 15:21

If she lives in an apartment she has to accept that there will be a certain amount of noise. I agree with the poster who said make a note of the complaint and get her to sign it. You are just going about your day to day business, you don't have anything to worry about.

FairyCakeBump · 15/02/2010 15:21

I agree with what's been said so far - turn it back onto her and find out what her expectations are and take it from there. If you check out your machine and there's nothing wrong with it, then it's your landlord's responsibility to sort this out.

Shelter have some good information on noise - it's written from the perspective that the reader is the one suffering from the noise but it should help. You can use it as a checklist to make sure you're being reasonable, which you are. england.shelter.org.uk/get_advice/neighbourhood_issues/noise_nuisance

I would get a little notebook and write down the time and date that she complains, as suggested. It will help you to prove that you're not making unreasonable noise during anti-social hours and also that your neighbour is being unreasonable. You can show your landlord as well and put the onus on him to sort it out.

Original poster

peacelover · 15/02/2010 15:30

She made me call someone out to have a look at it and the conclusion was that there was nothing physically wrong with the washing machine. My dad owns a kitchen business so he has looked at it aswell and said that it doesn't need replacing. The tumble drier was a birthday present from my dad and is apparently one of the quieter models. Both are on carpets. She actually called me in to her flat to listen to the noise before (when I was trying to deal with Sky engineers who actually told her she was being unreasonable. lol.) I honestly wouldn't have a problem with that level of noise but everone is different. She told me last time that she could hear it mostly in her bedroom and not at all in her living room. I was honestly tempted to ask her why she was in her bed at 5pm!

OP posts:

kittyonthebeam · 15/02/2010 15:31

Could you try and speak to the other tenants? Like, get together for a meeting and decide how to deal with her as a council?

I'd go round and knock on everyone's door and ask other neighbours if they've had any abuse from her and what to do about it.
She is unreasonable! Poor you!

ArcticFox · 15/02/2010 15:35

She is being unreasonable.

No apartments are ever completely sound proof and it's normal to be able to hear some comings and goings, people moving around, plumbing, doors slamming etc. So long as you're not running your WM in the middle of the night she doesn't have grounds for complaint.

If the soundproofing was that bad her main problem would be being able to hear you walking around/ the TV etc.

It seems as though this has become a bit of an obsession with her.

tethersend · 15/02/2010 15:35

I would contact the landlord (before she does) and explain that you are terribly worried about the lack of soundproofing. If and when she contacts him, you will have logged the problem first. It is his responsibility.

tethersend · 15/02/2010 15:36

Can't she paint a picture about it?

wishingchair · 15/02/2010 15:38

So let me get this straight:

she complains about your washing machine
she makes you get someone out to look at it
you do
they say it is fine
she still complains that she can hear it, the last time she did this it was on at 5pm (not 5am, 5pm)

You need to have a talk with her in a friendly neighbourly way and say that since you have no alternative but to use the washing machine (that has been proven to be in good working order), and she therefore has no alternative but to listen to the noise, then there is clearly a sound proofing issue so you both need to approach the landlord. You are not being unreasonable and, perhaps, neither is she (although she doesn't particularly sound suited to apartment-living!).

Original poster

peacelover · 15/02/2010 15:38

I forgot to say - yes I do live in a flat and I rarely hear noise from other flats. She's in her 50s/60s. The guy next door had builders in for the last 3 weeks who were there from 9am to 10pm, 7 days a week. She didn't say a word to him (I've spoken to him recently as there is a puddle of black oil on the carpet outside my front door and I didn't want to be blamed for it!).

OP posts:

WorzselMummage · 15/02/2010 15:43

I'd be inclined to start throwing wild parties and doing my washing at midnight

serioudy though, the making notes advice is good. Carry on as normal and get a few weeks notes then go and get a solicitor yo write her z letter outlining everything you've said here and warning her to leave you alone and then if shecarries on I'd speak to the police about getting her done for harassment.

How often is she complaining ?

Original poster

peacelover · 15/02/2010 15:46

Tethersend - Lol. Actually she came up recently and asked me if she could do a double portrait of me and my partner. I said I'd think about it but am now starting to think that it's a ploy to lure as in so she can kill us!

Wishingchair - I've done that but she's like a dog with a bone. Her husband told me before that he thought we'd come to a compromise on how much washing I was doing. Am very confused and quite livid as we have never discussed this and I only do 2 loads a week. Certainly can't cut down at all as DP works 2 jobs and does loads of sport and I work in the beauty industry and need to look clean! We have no children but are currently planning to start ttc ( in which case we will be moving elsewhere thankfully).

OP posts:

kittyonthebeam · 15/02/2010 15:47

From what you are saying it seems that she has ishoos with you. Hmm...

Definitely try to get others on your side in the house or lodge a complaint/inquiry first as tether said.

tethersend · 15/02/2010 15:51

Salvador Dali used to put iron filings in catfood and leave it out for the local strays so they would screech in pain all night and give him nightmares- which he claimed gave him inspiration for his vile paintings.

She should be thanking you.

Ziggurat · 15/02/2010 16:00

Tell you've taken all the necessary steps to ensure that everything is in proper working order and what does she suggest at this point?

She must understand that you need clean clothes.

Morloth · 15/02/2010 16:00

We had a mad downstairs neighbour when we first moved here. I was so worried about it (not having lived in a flat before), turns out it was all her problem and she had complained about every single tenant upstairs for years (hence the high turnover of tenants for that flat I suspect).

We are now in the downstairs flat and can hear washing machines/vacuuming etc, it happens it is a flat.

Was very pleased to see that the latest people in our old flat are about 5 Australian backpackers, HAH! Bet that will make her miss us.

moomaa · 15/02/2010 16:33

Sounds like she is lonely and attention seeking, especially with the portrait too.

I think you have to tell her that you need to use the washing machine and you're sorry for the disturbance that causes but there's nothing you can do. There isn't any consequence that she can bring, and if she is just attention seeking then she won't whinge to the landlord as she won't want you to move out.

abbierhodes · 15/02/2010 16:53

Ask if you can use her washing machine if it's clearly less disturbing than yours!

I agree with those who are saying that she now needs to tell you exactly what she suggests you do. You are well within your rights to use household appliances during daylight hours, she's clearly bonkers. I agree I'd be mentioning the term 'harrassment' too.

23skidoo · 15/02/2010 18:09

Make more noise for the lulz! HA! But seriously karma is a b*ich ;) for her...

AmesBS7 · 16/02/2010 11:38

Have a look at this link: Marsona. Print it off and give it to her.
We live in an old house with flats next door and can hear light switches, washing machine, grumbling water pipies, musc, talking etc through the bedroom wall on occasion.
When we want peace and if there's noise next door after we've gone to bed, we turn this on and it blanks out all the background sound.
You notice it for the first 5 minutes and then your brain phases it out.
Noise from neighbours is just one of those things and she could do with trying to find some ways of coping herself, without trying to make it your problm, which it's not - especially if you're quite after 9pm.
I would love to have you as a neighbour!

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