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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to knee my husband in the nuts on Valentine's day?

31 replies

deaddei · 14/02/2010 09:42

Dh has asked me to put this on here as he is feeling aggrieved.
He pulled me to him in a sort of hug, and I said "mind my neck"- which is sore this morning as I slept on it badly.
He immediately replied "oh, no it isn't".
At which point I kneed him, but not hard.
Now he does this a lot- if I say I have a headache, he'll tell me I haven't.
How does he know how I'm feeling?

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 14/02/2010 09:45

i wouldn't have kneed him

seems a bit of an over reaction

but then if you don't feel good it is aggravating when you are told you don't

elmofan · 14/02/2010 09:45

oh dear you do seem a bit violent grumpy this morning

ssd · 14/02/2010 09:46

tell him to grow up

Original poster
deaddei · 14/02/2010 09:47

It is that time of the month....

OP posts:
elmofan · 14/02/2010 09:51

ah well then YADNBU

diddl · 14/02/2010 09:56

I doubt I would have kneed him but I wouldn´t worry-you can tell him it didn´t/doesn´t hurt

heQet · 14/02/2010 10:02

You were totally unreasonable to knee him. But I understand totally your anger. My husband tells me how I'm feeling! If I say I am upset about something, he'll tell me I'm not, it's something else I HATE it when people try to tell you how you feel. How do they know? If you say you feel something - be it pain or emotion, who the hell are they to tell you you don't?

Tell him from me that he's a prat. He DOESN'T know. And he should just accept what YOU tell him YOU feel about YOUR body.

queenoftheslatterns · 14/02/2010 10:03

YABU, no need for that. imagine if a mner posted that

"I pulled him to me in a sort of hug, and he said "mind my neck"- which is apparently sore this morning as he slept on it badly.
I immediately replied "oh, no it isn't".
At which point he slapped me, but not hard.
Now he does this a lot- so if he says "I have a headache", I'll tell him he hasn't."

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 14/02/2010 10:05

YABVVVVVVVU

He disagreed with you and you deliberately hurt him. Nice.

Though you saying "mind me neck" and him saying "no it isn't" makes no sense unless you actually said it was sore.

LowLevelWhingeing · 14/02/2010 10:06

YANBU to be pissed off that he said that.

YABU to resort to violence!

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 14/02/2010 10:06

my neck, not me neck

LilyLovesSid · 14/02/2010 10:11

YABU to knee him in the danglies!

But YANBU to be narked at him assuming how you feel. DP is a clumsy bugger and if he does something like tread on my foot and I say it hurt, he always says 'no it didn't'. It's like an automatic response. It bugs the crap out of me!

What really makes me laugh is that he has a pathetic pain threshold, so things that hurt me would have him laid up for a week with an icepack!!!

overmydeadbody · 14/02/2010 10:15

lol I tihnk you are over-reacting really.

But yes it is annoying when people think they know better how you are feeling

WhereYouLeftIt · 14/02/2010 12:19

Well, not an ideal situation, but ... presumably if he said "That hurt!" you could reply "No it didn't!" ??

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/02/2010 12:27

domestic violence is not the answer.

Mumcentreplus · 14/02/2010 12:42

Where

You might need those nuts treat them gently

mayorquimby · 14/02/2010 12:45

love how some people are justifying this or laughing at it in a "oh that time of the month" nature.
would love to see the reaction if the op posted in a couple of minutes that he's walked in and slapped her as he was narked at her. presume those people would find it equally ok and amusing.
by the way op you sound like a horrible person.

NiceShoes · 14/02/2010 12:51

You are a mentalist.With anger management issues.You need to apologise and figure out why you act the way you do.

Original poster
deaddei · 14/02/2010 13:37

Love your response Where- however it didn't hurt him as he is now having 18 holes of golf!
I shall bear that in mind next time he injures himself on the squash court.
Off to book some help for my anger management now.

OP posts:
BrahmsThirdRacket · 14/02/2010 13:44

If a virtual stranger said the same thing, would you assault them? Probably not. So why did you do it to your husband? PMT isn't an excuse to commit assault, and if you think it is then maybe you shouldn't be allowed out of the house when you have PMT. You can't have it both ways.

ChristianaTheTwelfth · 14/02/2010 13:45

Message withdrawn

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 14/02/2010 13:54

DO you really think it is funny deaddei?

I am sure you would be furious if he need you in the fanny.

nevereatbrownsnow · 14/02/2010 13:57

Crikey, even I wouldnt knee my dp in the uglies and thats saying something !

Dominique07 · 14/02/2010 14:06

Maybe in future you have to be really clear with yr DP and preempt his dismissal of your pain, put your hand up,
say "Stop!
I have a very painful stiff neck.
Do not touch me, and do NOT tell me my neck doesn't hurt."

Original poster
deaddei · 14/02/2010 14:15

Ladies- dh has just phoned and I have told him your comments....he feels vindicated and I now have to cook the dinner tonight. And perhaps "extras" as it is Valentine's Day.

OP posts: