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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think the Somali kidnap couple don't get any sympathy because they are not young and attractive?

67 replies

littlestmummystop · 12/02/2010 15:17

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1250361/Rachel-Chandler-My-rape-terror-hands-Somali-pirates. html

If they were: Blonde, young and female there would've been a tabloid appeal to save them.

or if they'd been a couple with a child

or if they'd been related to someone famous or v rich

But they are just a middle class middle aged couple whose family can't afford the ransom. So no big appeal or even news coverage ?

AIBU?

OP posts:
OrmRenewed · 12/02/2010 16:19

And I don't think people aren't sympathetic there just hasn't been a media frenzy over it. Is that a bad thing?

nannynobnobs · 12/02/2010 16:19

Surely the main argument here is not what they look like but that paying ANY ransom will green light the pirates to go for British ships again and again? Then it's 'You paid one ransom before, why aren't you paying this one?' etc etc.
The government said it was too dangerous in this case to use the SAS- perhaps because the couple have been separated. If one location is raided even minutes before the other perhaps the other captive would be killed? I'm just speculating.

nannynobnobs · 12/02/2010 16:24

Anyway, reports seem to suggest that the pirates refuse to believe that the couple aren't rich and that their family can't afford the ransom. If they could I think they bloody would have paid by now!
And the pirates apparently have said nobody in Britain cares about paying the ransom because the couple are 'old'. Is it just me or does it sound like an attempted guilt trip?! How dare we not pay the ransom so these poor honest pirates can be on their way. Fucks sake.

Itsjustafleshwound · 12/02/2010 16:26

There is always an element of taking responsibility for your actions ...

Blaming their lack of TV appeal is a flimsy excuse.

Perhaps if Terry Waite was a bit more attractive or the murdered Iraq bodyguards had a bit more media savvy ....

Ivykaty44 · 12/02/2010 16:26

sorry but I don't buy the goverments reasons that it is to dangerous to use SAS

Itsjustafleshwound · 12/02/2010 16:31

Don't you think the word pirate is a bit of a give-away that it isn't quite going to be a simple matter of paying the ransom money???

LadyThompson · 12/02/2010 16:32

They were warned not to sail there

They took a calculated risk

I am sorry for them but they were arrogant enough to ignore the advice given and they are paying a terrible price

Of course the government should not pay the ransom - there would be kidnappings left right and centre

All that said, obviously I hope they are released soon

Original poster
littlestmummystop · 12/02/2010 16:36

Point is... if this couple had been young and blonde ( or just young) or had connections there would be uproar that more isn't being done for them.

Regardless of their own stupidity help would have been given- probably a national appeal to raise the ransom if the government wouldn't do it type thing, round the clock Sky News etc.

What about the British Journalist who was in Afghanistan in the wrong area who was saved when he was definitely told not to go there?

Because this poor couple don't take good pictures and were perceived to be 'having a jolly' people couldn't give a stuff.

OP posts:
MarineIguana · 12/02/2010 16:40

No there is little sympathy because they knowingly took an unnecessary risk. Also possibly because (though I agree this is unfair) people may have less sympathy for the well-heeled yacht-owning classes.

Of course if they had a child with them it would be more heartrending - it wouldn't be the child's misjudgment and it would be harder for the child to cope.

I am sorry for them, it must be awful, but plenty of people around the world are being held hostage who we don't think of or hear of day-to-day.

LadyThompson · 12/02/2010 16:46

I just don't believe any newspaper would be so irresponsible as to have an appeal for a ransom, goodlooking hostages or not.

A journalist is different: they often go to dangerous places to be able to report what is going on. MIGHTILY different from a couple on a HOLIDAY.

porcamiseria · 12/02/2010 16:50

I dont agree, they HAVE been in the news, quite alot in fact

However , and I hate to say this, bad shit happens. They were in dangerous waters and very very sadly for them, they were kidnapped.

RockbirdandHerSpork · 12/02/2010 16:51

I don't think you can compare it to rape. Walking down the street should carry no risk. Sailing into other countries' waters where you are bound by their laws or lack of is a different story and not something you have to do to live your life.

And I really don't think their looks have anything to do with it. Forgive me for mentioning the McCanns but there was bugger all sympathy for them in the media; tons for Maddie but not for them and they were young and good looking. What they have in common though is stupidity and people can spot that a mile off.

And here endeth any reference to the McCanns

heQet · 12/02/2010 17:32

It's a dreadful situation, but the government cannot and must not pay a ransom. If they did so, then every british person might as well surrender their passport because we would be at risk.

Pay one ransom and you've got a massive problem on your hands.

That's no bloody comfort to that poor couple, or their family, but if the government pay the kidnappers, they put everyone else at risk, forever more.

JollyPirate · 12/02/2010 17:36

I think there may be more going on than we know about - perhaps the Press have been told to keep it low key. A few weeks ago they were seen by a doctor and this means that there are channels of communication open with their captors. I so hope that they will be released unharmed - news and information about them is getting out and they seem to be able to talk about what is happeneing.

I had heard that they were warned against sailing where they were but am not an expert in this so that could be incorrect.

crankytwanky · 12/02/2010 17:46

No it's because they were told it was dangerous to sail there, but they went anyway.

LaurieFairyCake · 12/02/2010 17:48

I haven't heard if they've offered to pay their own ransom by selling their house, did I miss that?

2shoescoveredinhearts · 12/02/2010 17:48

yabu
they were stupid

Spillage21 · 12/02/2010 18:05

They were sailing adjacent to an area of piracy, not directly in it. And were in a not-that-flash sailing boat - pirates have tended to go for larger, more lucrative vessels.

The pirates hijacking their sailing boat were in an area much further away from their usual 'patch'.

And as for taking responsibility for their actions - these two may die, separate from each other, is that enough for you?

StrictlyKatty · 12/02/2010 18:06

No, they were so pathetically stupid as to sail where they were told not to. They could caught.

Why should the government bail every moron out?

StrictlyKatty · 12/02/2010 18:07

They got caught rather

gerontius · 12/02/2010 18:17

If you're going on a voyage, you don't sail down a coast with lots of pirates. That's just common sense. And OP, there was a lot of new coverage when it actually happened. However, that was a few months ago, and the media has moved on, with the odd article here or there.

BrahmsThirdRacket · 12/02/2010 18:30

YANBU, there has not been very much coverage and I do think this is because they aren't telly-genic. But most people are united in thinking that they took a foolish risk.

Paying ransoms is out of the question, and it's because countries like Italy and Saudi Arabia do pay ransoms that pirates keep taking ships. At the risk of sounding rather Daily Mail, I do sort of wish we could just send in a gun boat. At the moment there is barely any deterrent against these pirates.

RockbirdandHerSpork · 12/02/2010 18:30

Spillage, so maybe they should have thought of that? Obviously their arrogance outweighed their concern for each other's safety. Enough people warned them to stay away from that area.

Bumperlicious · 12/02/2010 18:41

Do people really think because these people are not blonde people don't care, or not young? Ridiculous, plenty of people do care, but charities and governments are not trying to get funds because it is counterproductive to pay off terrorists.

Companies who do it is another thing, that is their prerogative and probably the government can't do much to stop them. And as for if it was a celeb, then again, yes I'm sure a ransom would be paid but it wouldn't be by the government.

What more do people want? You don't have national campaigns for every child who is sick and needs money for treatment, why should two random people who sadly find themselves to be in an awful situation be different.

And of course we would all see things differently if it were members of our family, but that's the wonder of objectivity.

The only way to prevent attacks like this in the future is to not make the act profitable. Any one who misunderstands that and attributes it to their not being young or blond is on another planet as far as I am concerned.

TheFallenMadonna · 12/02/2010 18:47

I think they got lots of sympathy when it happened. And now there is compassion fatigue after a long story, and a backlash too, as there always seems to be

And I reckon there'd be the same pattern whatever age they were and however attractive.