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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sexist Fundraising Dinner at School

64 replies

SexistDinner · 12/02/2010 14:30

My DC's school is holding a fundraising dinner ... for men only.

They are having several guest speakers (good ones who I would have loved to have seen/heard). They sent the letter to me, even though I'm a woman and can't go. S'rubbish isn't it?

AIBU to think it's a bit 1950s?

OP posts:
SixtyFootDoll · 12/02/2010 14:32

That is rather dated.
I could understand if it was for the Rotary Club or a similar 'mens club'
But for a school fundriaser? Nah not good.

displayuntilbestbefore · 12/02/2010 14:34

Is it to try and get more dads involved at the school? Can't think why they would be doing it just for men - if they're trying to raise funds surely they want as many people as possible, not limit it to one gender?

IndigoSky · 12/02/2010 14:34

Really? I cannot believe that a school is doing this. Is there something similar for women only?

Just go. They can hardly throw you out.

What sort of school is it? Do they teach children how to crawl up chimneys and give them a good clean?

CaptainUnderpants · 12/02/2010 14:35

Is this a private school ? I am surprised that the head has allowed it - not very inclusive is it ?

I bet that you will not be the only woman who is pissed off about it - if so then it can easily be boycotted .

Its not alsthough the men cna sit roundand smoke cigar etc like iin the 1950's - they would have to go outside !

Just email the organisers and ask whether their are strippers aswell .

bamboo · 12/02/2010 14:35

Does seem a bit odd but then lots of PTAs run Pamper Evenings for women, don't they, so maybe it's their take on that?

Fimblehobbs · 12/02/2010 14:36

Sounds odd. Who are the speakers? If they've got Clare Short, Germaine Greer and Alice Walker maybe they have decided they need to educate the dads...

morningpaper · 12/02/2010 14:37

ACtually I don't think it is that bad - loads of business "associations" are men or women only, it's not that different. And COUPLES fundraisers for schools are probably a bit pointless.

Why not just arrange a similar one for the women the following week or something?

CaptainUnderpants · 12/02/2010 14:37

I think PTA may run pamper evenings but they never say its just for women where this is blantant discrimination .

LittleSilver · 12/02/2010 14:37

l am amazed. why not talk tothe head, sound ridiculous. l would just turn up.

CaptainUnderpants · 12/02/2010 14:38

If the PTA are organising it the I would imagine that the majority on the commitee are Mums

Original poster
SexistDinner · 12/02/2010 14:40

Well I have to admit they do a ladies' pamper day in the summer . I've never been to one.

They probably therefore feel their sexism is fair and just.

Do you think I should write in and complain?

It's a boys' school and they have girls in the sixth form and lots of female staff too.

OP posts:
AngryPixie · 12/02/2010 14:41

I would pay to go and turn up anyway, and see who has the balls to ask you to leave.

amber1979 · 12/02/2010 14:41

They must have stated a reason for it being men only. What exactly did the letter say?

galletti · 12/02/2010 14:42

Mmm, well our School run 'Indulgence Days' for women only, usually around Mother's Day, so I suppose this is being equally sexist. Although its mainly to protect the mums' decency - waxing,massages, etc going on! Some of the dads have asked 'why just a women's event? Why can't we have a men's event - to which I have replied for years, 'Not a problem - come up with an idea and arrange it/we'll help to arrange it, but guess what? It's never happened

DorotheaPlenticlew · 12/02/2010 14:43

at the ladies getting a "pamper day" while the men get a dinner with interesting speakers.

They prob think they are just balancing things out, but it's quite badly judged and lame. And very old-fashioned!

Original poster
SexistDinner · 12/02/2010 14:44

Speakers are Rory Bremner and ALastair Campbell. I'd prefer to see them than have my toes painted.

OP posts:
FoxForceFive · 12/02/2010 14:44

Are you sure it's men only? I've been to gentlemens evenings (with sports personality-type speakers, rather than nekkid laydees IYSWIM) with DH before now, usually at the football club.

morningpaper · 12/02/2010 14:45

lol

How much are tickets?

bamboo · 12/02/2010 14:45

Gosh - quite high calibre speakers - how much are the tickets for that?

threetimemummy · 12/02/2010 14:45

Hm at first I thought you ere talking about our scool!! They are doing a St georges day celebration dinner for Men!!!! And it is a local school, co-ed. I was a bit but then just deleted it!!

FoxForceFive · 12/02/2010 14:45

That sounds like a good night. Go anyway.

CaptainUnderpants · 12/02/2010 14:46

I think I would like to go - shall we turn up en block and see if they throw us out ?

Original poster
SexistDinner · 12/02/2010 14:48

Letter says: To keep the unique atmosphere of previous sports dinners, the evening will be men only. We trust that ladies will understand.

I think "unique atmosphere" = beer, homophobia and crotch scratching.

OP posts:
DorotheaPlenticlew · 12/02/2010 14:49

Turn up in one of these

galletti · 12/02/2010 14:49

Mm, sounds like a dad with good contacts has thought this might be a hoot - can't imagine the mums would be organising a an evening like this just for men - I certainly wouldn't! I would have a word with the School/PTA to find out why.