to be pissed off with kids mother

[ravenophelia]

i look after a girl in my dd's class after school one day a week.she is normaly picked up by 7.was told today it would be later by 7.30 but the mother just called the dc (not me) and said it wont be till 8.15.i have a younger dd who goes to bed at 7.30.im annoyed for two reasons.one cause shes so late and two cause she didnt call me.aibu?

YANBU. Very cheeky. Make sure you're unable to do it next week and she'll get the hint.

YANBU in my opinion. Maybe she didn't want the backlash on telling you herself. So did it through her kid.

It would've got my goat though, also I'm pretty selfish and look forward to "me" time after 7.30pm at night but that's probably just a me thing. Having the goal posts changed at the last minute and the woman not having the guts to tell me directly would've annoyed me.

unfortunately i cant cause both girls go to a dance class when i look after her.also she pays for it in exchange for me looking after dc

i look forward to me time too.the problem is i feel like i cant confront her about it.

why?

cause i feel a bit intimidated by her.also cause shes paying for the dance class

Well I would put them to bed as normal and have her dd ready and waiting and when she gets there you should whisper.
Her dd will let her know how it was if she turns up late again, don't worry.

YADNBU. Its unavoidable that sometimes we end up being later than we hoped, but to ring child and not you is just bloody rude.
I would have a quiet word and say that although you dont mind tonight, in future 7.00 is the cut off as you have your own kids to sort out in the evening.

What if she starts doing it regularly? If you don't say something straight away, then it will be harder months down the line.

If you're unhappy about it, you have to say, or she'll think you don't mind. It does no good to silently resent something.

Let's hope it's just a one off, but tbh, she might be 'testing the waters'. You don't know.

thank you everyone.i know i need to confront her more but it wont be tonight cause she called herdc again and said when she is nearly here she will call again and dc is to go up the road to meet her.

Well that's not on for a start! calling her child instead of you? That shows a lack of respect and consideration for you! And having the child go up the road to meet her? She is really wanting to avoid you, isn't she?

Don't let her get away with that! Make sure you deliver the child to the car!

shes gone now.tomorrow i am telling her that after the easter holidays i wont be looking after herdd.tonight was the final straw.i am so

I don't blame you. did the child go up the road to her or did you see her?

Bloody hell, that is extremely rude. Clearly avoiding you by phoning her child, not you, and then telling her dd to walk down the road to meet her. What on earth is the mad woman on?

thanks everyone. yes heQet the dc did walk up the road.i have sent her an email saying i wont be doing it anymore after easter hols.soon i will be finished with her nonsense.

have you had a reply yet?

yes heQet she has replied.she said thank you it has been a godsend.i told her my dd wouldnt be continuing with the dancing but she said she "wouldnt mind continuing paying even if i didnt have her dd as her dd loves going to dancing with my dd" i wont be taking her up on her offer.