to wonder if OPKs and the like are preventing some women from conceiving?

[OtterInaSkoda]

That's it really.

I've had reason to peruse various huns non-MN boards recently and have been struck by the number of posts by women who seem to rely on OPKs and counting cycle days to see if they're "allowed" to (apologies) bd or (worse) dtd.

Are some couples unintentionally sabotaging their efforts by relying on these things?

Um, probably not sabotaging their efforts if they are using them correctly?

ok whats OPKs BD and DTD?

They are very effective tools if you use them properly. Just ask ny first 2 children (though not my surprise third )

why would people only be "allowed" to have hot lovin' at the time they think their ovulating?
Sex every few days is surely the best way cos arnt eggs supposed to live for 3 days or something?

I thought OPK was the acronym for 'Other People's Kids' - I'm sure they do put many people right off having any of their own!

That's what I mean, butterfly. I wonder if there are some couples who wait for a chart or a test to give them the green light - and if there are then that's really quite sad.

I appreciate that used properly they're a Good Thing.

Had I been TTC and aiming for day 14 (or whatever) last pregnancy I'd have missed the boat. I know that pregnancy was the result of a drunken shag on day 10 (maybe even 9). I'm not being smug btw - it ended in MC - but you get my drift.

Grimma - Other People's Kids are indeed an excellent contraceptive

I've used them, saved me having to have lots of unnecessary sex

YANBU to wonder it but I don't agree with you. AS eggs are only good for a very short period of time (24-36 hours I think?) then I can't see the harm in them.

Prediction kits helped us to fall for our DD, I didn't use them this time round because I now have a better understanding of my cycle having used them and read up about it more.

I think they're particularly useful for women who have irregular cycles. Although, if what the OP says is correct, women who use them to find out when they are 'allowed to' have sex seems rather odd.

I did use one, actually - it wasn't to say when you could do it, it said when you really really should do it if you see what I mean. If you aren't sure when/if you're ovulating, I think they can buck you up and make you feel more positive.

Hmmm - well I used OPKs - but my 12 week scan indicated I'd conceived the week before my positive test indicated, iyswim. So yes, I agree with you - YANBU.

I think OPKs and counting cycle days over simplify the subject and consequently can be unreliable. This may lead to "some couples unintentionally sabotaging their efforts"

So in that respect I agree with you. YANBU

There really is quite a small window for conception to take place but you can use much more accurate methods such as detailed in this book. It can also be used to work out when there is no chance of conceiving very accurately so is a useful natural method of birth control. (It is very accurate, involves logging morning body temperature and position of cervix for a while to get to know exactly when you ovulate etc)

For people who have been TTC for a long time, sometimes sex every few days can unfortunately become so it can be easier to target your fertile days.

When we had our first hospital appointment for infertility I shared my "records" with the consultant who commended me and could rule out certain tests as being unecessary because the information was very thorough and useful from a medical point of view.

I'm not sure if feeling only "allowed" on those days would be helpful but then I haven't really heard many people express that view

OP, have you ever experienced infertility ?

TCOYF

"I wonder if there are some couples who wait for a chart or a test to give them the green light - and if there are then that's really quite sad."

Why is it sad? Do you mean, if they're avoiding doing it on other days? Well yes, that is sad. But surely not, if they trying to get pregnant, and therefore doing on days likely to result in conception...?

"I appreciate that used properly they're a Good Thing."

Indeed - I've got knocked up 4 times now, using OPKs.

"Had I been TTC and aiming for day 14 (or whatever) last pregnancy I'd have missed the boat."

Right, which is where OPKs come in...

Most people don't ovulate on day 14, so using OPKs helps them pinpoint exactly when they do ovulate, ergo - better chance of hitting the jackpot. Er, is this not obvious?

OP I think you should post this in the conception threads and ask the ladies who have had many problems trying to conceive a baby and see what their responses are. Not every woman has copious or even minute amounts of ewcm to predict when they are becoming fertile. You don't automatically become pregnant if you have sex when you are fertile either, I think it's only a 25% chance each cycle even less the older you are. It's insulting to suggest that some ladies who are not getting pregnant is because they are not having sex when they are fertile/have mucus or because they haven't read TCOYF, I think you will have find leonie that many ladies have done everything you have done and after several months and some even years are still not pregnant.

I have never come across anyone who feels that an opk allows them to have sex, only that an opk tells them when the best time to have sex is. I am not suggesting that opk's are 100% reliable but at the end of the day it's not about what you did or what you didn't do, it's mostly down to luck. Just be thankful you don't have fertility problem.

Pointsmakeprizes - agree with you, we did TCOYF and just about everything else known to mankind but after 9 years of doing everything right we are still unable to concieve (have adopted two gorgeous girls tho )

"Just be thankful you don't have fertility problem."

Exactly.

In the 16 months of trying for DS1 I found, via OPKs, that we had to have sex the day after I got a positive on one of them. Not the day of, or the day before, or two days later, but the day after. And then 1 had a miscarriage, and then another - the same pattern each time - I was only successful if we shagged the day after getting the positive.

After 16 months and 2 m/cs (which is nothing compared to some people), isn't it understandable to want to start pinpointing things somewhat?

I also had very little, if anything in the way of external ewcm, so couldn't go by this indicator.

Lastly, I found OPKs much less of a hassle than temping and charting, which just felt too much like a military operation for me.

OPKs I could fit into my day quite easily, without it taking over my life - the way I envisaged charting to do. Plus, charting only tells you that you ovulated in hindsight - not when you're about to ovulate which is where OPKs come in.

anyone silly enough to think they are only allowed sex within 48 hours of a +ve opk is probably better off out of the gene pool anyhow

I spent 38 cycles in fruitless if pleasurable sex trying to get pregnant with DS. Cycle 39 I finally tried OPK's on a friends recommendation and 14 days later I was looking a +ve pregnancy test.

Second time round I used OPK's and got pregnant on the first try.

well I have found OPKs and fertility charting wonderful. I spent 14 months TTC number 2 with no luck. I was making sure to have sex every couple of days nothing. 2 months of OPKs and I was pregnant. The window is so small that an OPK just gives you that extra clue. I have also used fertility charting to AVOID pregnancy since my first daughter was born, the only time I have been pregnant by accident I was on the pill!.

I think that it is very easy to get caught up in using these things when you dont actually have a fertility problem. I DO think that the internet encourages that.

I find the 'shall we all go for a valentine's BFP' ones a bit worrying. Surely that is just going to make everyone feel bloody awful who dont manage to time their conception exactly right?

And huge long threads with some poor woman endlessly posting photos of clearly negative pg tests and asking desperately for others to tell her they can see 'a very faint line'. They are really sad (I dont mean that in a sarky way)

Its a very different issue for those who are having real problems conceiving though. I think unless someone has experienced that its impossible to really understand.