to be a bit concerned by this phone call from a Health Visitor?

[FrozenNorth]

I'm expecting DC2 in about 5 weeks time. Health Visitor rang yesterday to arrange a visit 'before the new baby arrives'. She was a bit vague as to why the visit was happening. I don't recall anything of this type happening before DC1 arrived.

I'm suspicious / concerned because I recently started antidepressants and admitted to my doctor that I don't have much family support and DH is away with the army. What I did emphasise is that I felt I was coping okay and have good childcare arrangements in place - a nanny and, from March, an au pair to help out in the evenings. I wonder whether the HV is coming for a visit to check up on how I'm caring for DC1 in the circumstances. Another thing that worries me is that DC1 hasn't yet had her MMR (because she keeps being ill on the day of the vax / we were snowed in) so maybe this has raised flags around our family too.

Am I just being utterly paranoid, or might I be onto something here? I don't want to be stigmatised for having done something that I see as sensible i.e. asking for help from the GP when I felt I needed it. It was particularly hard to do because I'm a psychologist and deal with some of these people professionally. Anyhow, what would you feel in the circumstances? Quite happy to be told I'm being unreasonable - in fact, it would be a relief.

If it reassures you, I had a visit from the HV before my dd was born. I think she dropped off the red book and the 0-5 nhs book as well. I'm sure it's just normal procedure and nothing sinister.

Apparently round this way too it is the new thing, a visit before baby as well as one after so HV can introduce themselves, get to know you and see if you need to ask anything.

Had me worried too as I'd never had this with other 3.

But don't worry, you're not being targeted

Oooh hang on - YABU - forgot that bit

I'm with chaos

I think it's normal procedure now, My Hv came round twice before Ds was born to drop off a few things. It was actually good to meet her first actually because I was really worried about meeting her for the first time whilst I was shattered from the new baby and still in my Pj's!

I had that for DD4, not for the previous 3, maybe they recently identified that doing the first visit before babies are born was beneficial for some reason?

could be just hv going round in circles. They used to do pre birth visits years ago.

I get the impression the hv are getting more into counselling and supportive visits now. Ours came round to see how I was coping as ds3 just had an op. Not that she did much - talked more about our old dog having heart failure. So i would'nt worry.

I ahven't had it, but did have 3 differnt visits by 2 different proffesionals before bringing DD3 home from SCBU... she was all fine, no meds or anything, just wanted to make sure we had adequate heating etc and was prepared to bring home our premmy baby. Was very strange and was a bit weary about their visits before they came.

Hi I didn't have this but we live in a weird place where we cross three county boundaries so it was more to do with noone knew who should be looking after us. My two friends, who live in the main town had hv visits before giving birth. They too were worried but it is apparently what they do. Don't stress it won't be about your ability to cope x

My HV made an appointment to see me before DD was born. I was similarly suspicious but in the event she never even turned up. It is just a 'hello how are you' sort of visit.

frozen north

yanbu to wonder about it but i think YABU to be concerned

i had a prebirth visit for dd1, where i was given the red book and the NHS book someone else mentioned. She talked through the way the clinics worked and also gave me the grapevine magazine for our area so i could strat going to groups or baby massage if I wanted to.

And, if she happens to know about your depression or your husband being away then I would just look on it as positive support. I dont think they have time to do home visits just because someone didnt bring their child in for MMR, honest.

You arent doing anything wrong and you sound like you have a fab support network in place, and if she happens to be concerned then she will see that.

Hurrah, I'm very glad to see that there's most likely nothing to worry about. One occasion on which I'm very glad to be wrong. Thank you everyone!

I think it's natural to be concerned if it's a new procedure but I'd be pleased that I had a HV who was available for any extra support I might need. it possibly 'is' because you've spoken to your gP, so she;s reacting to that identified need for extra support from elsewheer.