I commute 2hrs to work by train. I go twice/three times a week (there and back home in one day). The rest of the time I work from home.
My friend Anna does something similar but stays overnight instead at her boss' place (Jim and his wife). She's from a culturally different background to me and what she says goes, there's no subtlety or feelings involved. She is lovely, though!
Tomorrow, I go there at 8am have meetings 11am-1.30pm and afternoon working in the office, would catch train at 6ish. Yesterday Anna says 'I have organized to do a party at Jim's but I haven't asked him yet. You have to come'.
I say 'I would but he lives miles away and I won't make the late train back'. She says 'stay overnight on Jim's sofa.'
Now not only has she not asked Jim, but she also ignored my pleas. I have had serious feelings of depression lately following a miscarriage a year ago and have had gynaecology problems ever since. Right now, for instance, I'm having a huge menstrual nightmare. Outwardly I try to be my 'usual self' but sometimes my heart just breaks especially at night. I need to be at home at night or at least able to get home. I need to see DH. I need to not have a menstrual flood in a stranger's home where there is no bed for me. Also the party won't start til 10pm, so I'll have to wait in the office for a lift to Jim's (about 40miles away). I feel down and hormonal and crap particularly after 9pm (like right now!) and Anna will not listen to me. I didn't say 'yes' and she ignored my 'no'.
Now she's even emailed saying 'it's Vivia's first party here! Let's make it a wild one!' and Jim knows nothing of it!
Maybe I am BU because I know it's a nice gesture. But I'm physically feeling awful and emotionally oscillating.
My real question is how do I get out of this? Please help!