to want a family holiday for just the 3 of us?

[EverythingsPink]

Since our DD was born 2 years ago we have had UK / Ireland holidays for long weekends or just one week in a rented cottage. And every time we have brought along either my parents or my in-laws or gone camping with friends or brothers / sisters. This year I have suggested that it would be nice to have a week abroad (maybe Northern France - so hardly somewhere exotic) and it just be us - me, husband and DD.

While OH likes the idea of possible sunshine he'd like to invite his sister and her family. Who will no doubt want to invite their parents. Before you know it, its a huge family holiday and i'll feel guilty for not inviting my mum...etc. etc.

He is worried that we won't be able 'to do stuff' because we'll have DD with us. when i asked him what kind of things we wouldn't be able to do he couldn't think of anything other than stupid things that we wouldn't do anyway like scuba diving??? (Who goes to France to scuba dive?) He says he is picturing us sat in a caravan all evening from half 7 cos she'll be in bed!!

I am thinking of June time so it won't be really hot but hopefully nice weather, and a family type resort / caravan park. We can go swimming, see the local area etc. Surely this is a nice idea that most husbands would like the sound of?

Am i being unreasonable to want this??

well, without sounding harsh - early nights do happen once you have kids!!

But there are ways round it!! Our boys will sleep in the pushchair of an evening as our routine goes right out the window!!

We are more "daytime" people anyway then "evening" (which is lucky because the boys are up at 6am!) so we like going out for the whole day.

If your little one sleeps in the dark get a portable blackout blind to put up at the window because caravan ones are so thin

YANBU at all. I think he should understand that you want to spend time as a family.

I don't think you're unreasonable to want that kind of a holiday. But I think you should tackle your husband a little more closely on just what he finds so awful about the prospect of being alone with his wife and small daughter. Is this typical behaviour? Does he make a point of being out of the home or is he happy spending time together at the weekends, for example? If the two of you aren't enough for him, maybe there are bigger issues at play

YANBU

We are lucky enough to have in -laws in France, so go there every year. But the first holiday we had just us was special.

YANBU to want to have a holiday with just the 3 of you but I'd be prepared to compromise on where and the kind of holiday you go on.

I completely understand that we won?t be able to go out partying all night ? but we?re not bothered about that, we are more ?day? people too. (we?ve only been to a nightclub once in the last 4 or 5 years anyway, and that was before we even had a child!) And I?m quite relaxed about her routine being upset for a few nights ? isn?t that the whole point of a holiday?

I have to say I was quite offended that the thought of a week with just us seemed so unappealing to him. I don?t think there is anything sinister to it though as we do spend a lot of time together, he?s not the type of man that disappears off to the pub with his mates or spends every wkend on the golf course or has weekends away or anything like that. We probably spend about 90% of our time outside work together doing family things. (maybe he wants a holiday from me??  )

I?m happy to compromise on location, accommodation, dates etc. but not happy about sharing our holiday. Going with others always means some degree of compromise on what to do, where to go each day, where to eat etc. (and being with someone else?s kids?) I just want time on our own.

We often do holidays with family or friends, but I agree it is also nice sometimes to have a holiday just the 3 of us.

How about hiring a nice cottage or apartment somewhere? In the evening, your DD can stay up a bit later than normal for a walk or meal out, and then hen you come home you and Dh can either sat comfortably inside, or sat on a deck/patio outside enjoying a bottle of wine and nibbles.

YANBU - itb would drive me wacky to be on hol with extended family members all the time! Though with one small child it is sometimes more social and fun to have company.

We fed DS early and then got him to sleep in his buggy on a stroll round the village, and then went to dinner with him sleeping peacefully. Admittedly I did once have to put sunglasses on him to make him think it was dark to get him to drop off, but mostly it was fine!

Hi. I'm a recently reregistered mumsnetter.

I would really suggest you talk to your DH again or you will end up like me. In 25 yrs we have only ever had one holiday when it was just us and the dcs.
Every other holiday he has invited family or friends along and it drives me mad to the point of after the last holiday (...a cottage in Wales which was supposed to be just us but after two days two friends "joined" us. I didn't even know that DH had invited them.)I have vowed to never organise/book another holiday. My eldest two dcs are now at an age that they no longer want to holiday with us as they are 19 and 21 and so I feel that I have completely missed out on family holidays.

YANBU we go on hols alone as family...people invite themselves and i have no problem with that but I wont be running around collecting cash etc and getting all stressed..our holiday is sorted but if they turn up too its cool..its nice to just get away the 4 of us..next year we probably will be doing an extended family holiday to spain or malta

YANBU.

When ds was a toddler we went to Keycamp in Italy. We had a couple of late nights but the majority of the time he went to bed at 7ish and we sat outside the caravan with a bottle of wine and nice food.

We both enjoy having a holiday with just the three of us. When more people tag along you end up compromising on what you do.

YANBU. We NEVER have our main summer holiday with anyone else. Weekends away and the like, sure, but not that summer fortnight.

Fortunately DH agrees ? he likes to spend time with just the four of us, doing exactly what we want, when we want, and actually thinks it?s rather strange to ask other people along, though I admit we seem to be in the minority on this.

I suggest going for a week just the 3 of you this time, and see how you get on. It's only a week, and if it turns out not as successful/enjoyable as you thought, go with family next year. By the end of a fortnight with MIL and SIL with us abroad, I used to be relieved to go home, but felt obliged as neither would go abroad on their own.

I would be ready to commit murder if I had to holiday with extended family.

Dh and I really like to chill out at the end of the day on holiday, have a glass of wine and watch a DVD together, rather than running round doing housework.

Holidays with both my side and his side!!! No way. I can manage one but not both.

We do long weekends usually. 3-4 nights. And we expect to be in early and relax, drink wine, experiment with dinner, watch a dvd etc once the kids are in bed. It's different from what we used to do but life is different now and we enjoy it.

Last holiday we learnt quite a few different cocktails. Was really fun

YANBU. Have done both, and much prefer holdays with just us. It doesn't hurt for DC's to stay up and as others have said, it is nice to just relax with a bottle of wine if they are in bed.

I like to please ourselves on holiday and other people and what they want to do - especially those who like to make plans and stick to them - drive me a bit mad!