to attempt to bribe my 2yo?

[ButterPie]

Had a lovely day out today with DD, but by the time of waiting for the bus she was getting tired (she is 2.10 yo, we had been to playgroup, lunch at a friends house, storytime at the library then looked at some books). She was on her reins and DD2 was in her sling and by this point my friend had gone home, so I was the only adult) She was generally messing about, rolling on the floor, at one point she tried to eat some soil, running round and round me, whining to be carried and so on. I still have spd and I was tired from being up all night with the baby as well as trying to work my mobile to find out if there was another bus stop nearby with more regular buses.

I just started blatant bribery, I'm afraid, offering her chocolate, fruit and magazines if she behaved and even at one point threatening to leave her there. The other woman waiting at the stop gave me such a disapproving look I thought she must be on mumsnet

Really, though, if I had the pram I would have just strapped her in and she would have gone to sleep, problem solved, but with no pram what could I have done? I had tried being firm, I had tried explaining, I had tried ignoring the behaviour until it got unsafe.

Everyone has this stuff happen, just forget it. Never bribe with chocolate - always keep that for yourself.

Is bribery wrong? Sounds like you were doing your best under difficult circumstances to me.

Perhaps the other woman could have helped you by engaging with DD and distracting her from her activities?

i bribe i have a 2 and 1yr old and 2yr old is often rewarded with a breadstick or organix fruit thingy and when desperate a smartie when im out because hes been an angel when the younger one needed me more, or because hes tidied two boxes of toys while ive changed dd and re clothed her after shed ruined another outfit,

YANBU

Nowt wrong with a bit of bribery when essential. Really when you think about it, adults don't do anything that doesn't have a reward! (it's just not as 'obvious' as it is when you are 'bribing' small children).

Had to be done..bribey is only an issue when it becomes a major habit to encourage your child to fulfill basic tasks and behaviours ..and I've threatened to leave mine too ....you would have got the 'I feel your pain look' from me.

Why is it bribery to try to do your best to make an unpleasant experience for someone more pleasant and bearable?

If you were tired and miserable and had no other way to express it other than to find your own amusement, you'd probably go and buy yourself a chocolate and a magazine.

YANBU - keep doing it. Not bribery, just trying to make your children's lives more pleasant.

I only have two parenting techniques really . One is distration (gosh let's look at that bird up there) and the other is bribery (come and sit down and you can have some of my lovely chocolate). So I think you were totally NBU and in fact were coping very well in the circumstances! Glad you had a lovely day and to the snotty unhelpful woman.

YANBU

I do think us Mums tend to give ourselves a hard time sometimes. You were doing your best. Some Mums (including me) might have lost their temper and shouted or smacked. Sleep deprevation is after all, a form of torture and when you add a tantruming toddler to that, I think you handled the situation fine. We all bribe now and again.
Don't pay any attention to how other people look at you. You have to have thick skin when you become a mum.

Are we not supposed to bribe them? Ooops.

Ds is regularly bribed with gingerbread men. He walks nicely all the way to the shops he gets a gingerbread man which keeps him quiet as we go round the co-op The lady who works in the bakery knows him so well she just hands him a gingerbread man when we go in

Bribery sort of like praising the good behaviour is it not?
Better than punishing the bad, I think.

this thread has made me feel so much better,