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AIBU?

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Original poster

To phone this restaurant to suggest they look at their staff training?

46 replies

narna · 27/01/2010 20:28

I took my two DC to a family restaurant for tea today.
Toddler DS was strapped into the highchair beside me.
When the waitress brought our drinks over she dropped a full glass of coke with ice over my DS's head.He was absolutely soaked to the skin and got quite a fright.
I didnt see what happened ,the waitress said my son threw his head back and knocked the tray of drinks which made her drop the drink-i can well believe that so i didnt make a fuss at the time,just comforted my son and changed his top.
I cant help thinking now that as a waitress she should have been taught not to stand so close to a young child in a highchair,they are after all unpredictable.
I do accept it was an accident,she did apologize so maybe i aught to just let it go.I just cant help thinking what if it had been a hot drink,my son would have been very badly scalded .Do you think i should ring the restaurant and suggest they make staff aware of this danger?

OP posts:
moomaa · 27/01/2010 22:12

I have noticed waiters/waitresses holding hot plates/drinks around young children in a way a parent wouldn't. I think you develop a radar as a parent that you can't expect everyone else to have. I have commented a few times like 'oh, that tray's getting a bit close to DS I'll hold him so he doesn't grab for it' and they are always glad to have it pointed it out.

My friend had DD on her lap once (about 10 months old) and the waitress put a cup of coffee right in front of my friend and DD grabbed and tipped it all over my friend (luckily not all over DD). We could both see what was going to happen as she put it down but neither of us could move quick enough. we weren't cross because there was no serious harm done and the poor girl was mortified. She learnt her lesson.

At the end of all that I think I am trying to say that you need to be proactive too, accidents happen and you can't expect everyone to know how toddlers will react.

PureAsTheColdDrivenSnow · 27/01/2010 22:55

Ivykaty - how would you suggest the OP 'take responsibility for her DS actions'?

Tie him down? Tether him when Waitresses are close

If a waiter/waitress is taking food or drinks to a table then next to, or over anybody's head (never mind a childs) is just wrong - surely you know this?

If you're carrying drinks, you simply don't go within 3' of a small child, just for the likelyhood of swiping over.

(christ - everybody in PizzaPizzaExpress seems to know this, so it can't be that difficult)

But OP - agree with the other people who said that the waitress will remember this and be more careful in future, on second thought I wouldn't bother phoning.

Comewhinewithme · 27/01/2010 23:09

You do realise IvyKaty that you sound ridiculous?
He was in a high chair not running around the place the OP did not know the waitress was going to stand behind her child and drop a drink on his head.
The OP has also said that she understands it was an accident but just wants to make the staff aware that small children might sometimes (shock horror) make a sudden movement.

ScreaminEagle · 27/01/2010 23:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

PureAsTheColdDrivenSnow · 28/01/2010 00:00

what ScreaminEagle said (excellent name btw)

IvyKaty - again, you are being quite ridiculus.

nappyaddict · 28/01/2010 01:15

Was she holding the tray behind DS or actually over his head?

I am a waitress and I always put hot food and any drink away from babies and toddlers for the parents to sort out first.

However it can be difficult to manoevere around tables especially if they are big parties and have probably on occasion had to reach over a baby or toddler to pass food or a drink to someone sat opposite them.

OtterInaSkoda · 28/01/2010 11:56

As nappyaddict says, sometimes you have to lean over a child, or stand too close to them, in order to get stuff on the table.

When ds was little I was always very careful to make sure that he sat stock still when a waitress was delivering food or drinks to our table. Not that this is foolproof nor is it always possible, and I am in no way blaming the OP, but I think IvyKaty has a point.

nickelbabe · 28/01/2010 12:06

okay, it wasn't the waitresses fault that the child swung his head.
it wasn't anyone's fault, but a bit of common sense could have prevented it form happening.

when i worked at Burger King, the staff training manuals had this kind of thing in them: it was important as such a big international company to cover all bases so that there was little chance that we could be sued for any accidents.

it should be in their basic training that they should hold drinks trays below the head height of a child in a highchair, that they can see what the child's doing , oh, and to stand a decent distance away from any child. (eg the length of their stretch)

i don't think it's such an issue to raise it with the restaurant.
i think it's a good idea.

Taramuddle · 28/01/2010 12:15

No if it is a small cafe/ restaurant & you'd have to lean over a child with drinks or something hot you stand where you are not going to endanger them and say ' could I pass this drink to you as this is hot'.
Christ it's not rocket science. Op you are right to be concerned, it fine to ring them. My friends baby pulled hot tea over himself & is still having skin grafts.

Gubbins · 28/01/2010 12:26

The waitress and the manager will be aware of this having happened, so leave it be.

I'm not quite sure why IvyKaty is being given so much grief. Yes a waitress has a duty of care to her customers, but a small child is an unpredictable thing and the parent has a greater duty of care. In my opinion it is the parents responsiblity to ensure where possible that the children are sat against the wall and to warn the children of the waitresses approach and to remind them to keep still as there will be food and drinks coming over. Maybe the OP did all this, in which case it was an unfortunate accident, but if she didn't bother then she is at least partly responsible.

Sn0wflake · 28/01/2010 12:40

I've been a waitress and was always very careful around children....you have to expect the unexpected. I think waiting staff that don't do this are quite frankly very poor and dangerous. I hope they offered you some money off. And yes phone.

IvyKaty, Gubbins - not sure your living in the real world quite frankly.

Nancy66 · 28/01/2010 12:43

You said yourself that you didn't see what happened. It was an accident, nobody was hurt.

Ivykaty44 · 28/01/2010 13:46

oh dear did two people on this thread not agree and so therefore we are not living in the real world...

If my dc throws there haed back and makes a waitress drop a drink it is my responsability - not the waitress.

As for you that want me to say tie the dc up or dont take them out - you are being stupid you shouldn't tie children up it is wrong - so don't put words where there are none

no I don't agree with most of you - that though doesn't mean I am wrong and you are right.

I think we live in a culture of blame others and get compensation and i don't always think it is right.

lal123 · 28/01/2010 13:49

It was an accident - these things happen. Of course if it had been a hot drink it could have been much worse - but it wasn't, it was a cold drink. I would assume that a waitress would be much more careful if carrying hot drinks.

StealthPolarBear · 28/01/2010 13:52

Babies move!! If I had to watch mine so she didn't move I'd do nothing else
"warn the children of the waitresses approach and to remind them to keep still "
I got the impression this was a 6/7 month old - did your DCs understand instructions at that very young age?

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 28/01/2010 14:04

Most people who have children are aware that you never hold a drink over their heads even when walking past. Waiting staff might not necessarily have thought of this - so YANBU, they should be trained. I probably wouldn't have had a change for DS so in that situation he would have been sticky, wet and cold until I had got him home, which is better than scalded but still awful.

Gubbins · 28/01/2010 14:23

OP refered to the child as a toddler, so my guess was closer more like 18 months than 6. Certainly old enough to be told "Careful now, here comes the waitress with our full drinks, lets sit still for a minute." which is what I used to do with my kids.

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 28/01/2010 14:25

Common sense lacking with the waitress.

StealthPolarBear · 28/01/2010 14:27

ah, did she, sorry.
Mine would have refused to sit in a high chair at that age which is why I made the assumption. Now we have it out for his little sister he can't get enough of it

MyHouseIsASquashAndASqueeze · 28/01/2010 16:17

YANBU There's nothing wrong with phoning just to suggest they make their staff aware of children in high chairs (not to complain necessarily).

Unforunately some people do lack a bit of common sense and it's worth giving them instructions not to stand behind/over highchairs while serving drinks/food.

I was a waitress for years (a good one) and I still had accidents at times so I never, ever served over the head of a young child unless table space made it absolutely necessary, and even then I'd usually put the tray down and hand the drinks round individually to avoid holding a tray over said child.

It COULD have been tea and it won't do any harm to mention it.

nappyaddict · 28/01/2010 19:15

MyHouse That works until you get pig headed customers who won't budge up a bit and make a bit of space so you can fit the tray on the table. Grrrrrrrrr

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