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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think my friends ex is a scumbag.

9 replies

drloves8 · 26/01/2010 13:32

They split up 2 years ago because she caught him with another woman in his hotel room.
He also had porn stuff on their pc .
To date he has ...disolved a company in which my friend had 50% off and hid the money
has bulied her into signing an agreement that their house is to be put up for sale.(both names are on mortgage).
He is shagging the dd`s dance teacher.(friend has suspicion that she was the ow in hotel, but cant prove it).
He has arranged that the house be put on market this week.
He has defaulted on his half of the mortgage payments 8 times in the past 10 months...my friend only found out when bank sent her letters 2 weeks after.(shes always paid her half on time,)
He earns stupid money - hes on about £40k a month.
My friend has been told by the bank she cant get a mortgage to buy him out as he didnt pay on time. Infact she cant get any mortgage at all for at least a year because of him.
She has no where to go.The council cant help except to offer her a place in the local homeless unit.-(not good idea its full of smackheads)
This selfish man has effectivly taken the roof from his daughters head.
He has enough money to live on , and has property abroad.why cant he gift his half to his daughter and let her stay there .
meanwhile - he bought the dd juciey couture tracksuits and computer consoles.
what good are they if she hasnt a home?

i really want to name and shame him.
AIBU to think hes scum?

OP posts:
drloves8 · 26/01/2010 13:34

oh and hes also "treated himself" to a bmw X5.

OP posts:
bearcrumble · 26/01/2010 13:35

No, YANBU but your friend shouldn't have rolled over and let him do all this. She should have got herself an aggressive lawyer and not signed away her rights and possessions, if only for her daughter's sake.

ASecretLemonadeDrinker · 26/01/2010 13:36

Are they married?

EleanoraBuntingCupcake · 26/01/2010 13:37

didn't we have a thread on this already from your 'friends' point of view?

drloves8 · 26/01/2010 13:52

Eleanor - i posted about the twat a bit before xmas i think.
bearcrumble -she had a lawyer , but she was hopeless , (another story , my friend is going to report her to the law society or something.)
They were not married , they got engaged years back but never got round to it.

OP posts:
feelhorrid · 26/01/2010 14:04

What a plonker! Get her to go to another lawyer and fast. Marriage is to some extent irrelevant. He should be supporting his daughter. If your friend cannot finance seeing another lawyer get to CAB - they are brilliant at helping to sort out debt muddles. It is quite likely the CAB will be able to help her sort out something with her mortgage company.

Name and shaming - I would want to do so...but number one priority is as you say to keep a roof over daughter's head.

drloves8 · 26/01/2010 14:16

I didnt know that the cab could help with this. I will tell her. But i think its clutching at staws tbh.
I just needed to get this out tbh, i think she is gona crack and i need to be a help to her.If i let myself get angry at him in RL how is that going to help them? .

OP posts:
feelhorrid · 26/01/2010 14:18

She is very lucky to have you. Get her down to the CAB tomorrow and then buy her a coffee while you plan.

mumbobumbo · 26/01/2010 16:59

Obviously YANBU!

Tell her not to be so worried about living in a Council hostel. I did it myself for a couple of months and it wasn't so bad. Obviously have to keep your doors locked etc, but at least its a roof over your head, and normally damn cheap at that. You can decorate them as you see fit. Its not great but its not forever, either.

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