to feel unappreciated by my dd1 (8)

[emkana]

This afternoon after school I sat down with my dd's and we played a board game and also I taught the dd's a rather long-winded card game that takes over half an hour to play. In it you have to be quite observant and initially I kept helping dd1, pointing things out to her, but as she kept relying on me to point mistakes out to her I stopped in the end and so she lost, which greatly upset her. So I said maybe we can have another round at bedtime. But then she wanted her dad to put things on her ipod and it all went on a bit so in the end there wasn't enough time for the long game. Cue dd1 being upset. So I told her I am quite cross that instead of appreciating the things I do do (like making the time this afternoon, plus doing similar things most days) she just focusses on the things she doesn't have/get. aibu?

Yeah, a little bit. It sounds like she wasn't that bothered about learning it so she relied on you to show her what to do, but still disliked losing.

I think 8 is a bit young to be 'appreciative'. At that age, you just accept what you have as normal rather than something you should be grateful for.

She is 8, and was tired.

Thats's just how kids are.

Either you were both BU, you were both NBU.

I dont think either of you were BU. *yr olds do need it pointing out to them when they are being a PITA.

Brahms, 8 is too old to just accept what you have and be ungreatful. I know kids like that and think of them as spoilt brats!

Well yeah they can understand that there are children who don't have as nice things as them, starving in Africa etc. But they won't think 'I'm lucky my mum spends so much time with me' because that is what they are used to.

she's 8

thats what they do

I think that you will have to wait a lot longer to be appreciated! When my 18 yr old came home for the the first time from university I felt he had a much greater appreciation of things he has always just taken for granted.

YY but my 7yo DS is VERY appreciative and understanding. He'll come up to me each night when I've eaten my dinner and say "You cooked me a lovely dinner, can I take your plate out for you". He is very happy with even the (tiny) amount of time I can give him (2 SN DC's as well). One game of Uno extreme and he's over the moon. He appreciates even the littlest treat (like a comic, as I can't afford them too often, it works out at almost £10 for one each!). I do think it is partly to do with that particular child's temperament(sp?) and I have to say, from talking to RL friends, I think on the whole, boys are more appreciative and less 'grabby' than girls. It's certainly true that my DD is like the OP's in that respect, and she's 11yo.