to be a bit jaded in running my Freecycle site

[backtolingle]

I've run a Freecycle site since summer 2006. I love what the organisation does - but running the site is getting a bit dreary just now.

It's two problems really

• I'm sick of not being able to tell rude people what I think of them. I'm sick of having to be so polite and conciliatory when they are rude (like the staff in Tesco have to be polite to rude customers all the time). It's the ones who can't work out their settings and who write to me as if I were their secretary falling down on the job that bug me. It's so tempting to reply saying "I'm not your secretary" (I don't of course).

and

• it's very hard to find other moderators who aren't either too passionate (and therefore liable to get into lengthly spats with members that I have to sort out)or abusing the system (just had to get rid of one today - she was using her early access to pending messages to run a nice little Ebay site).

I wonder whether 3 1/2 years is perhaps a natural lifespan for a volunteer role like this? I know it goes with volunteer territory to have your time undervalued - it just seems to be bothering me more than usual just now and I feel really snappy.

As a mod myself, I know where your coming from, I would love to send some replies back of exactly what I think..but im not allowed - probably a good thing

Maybe you need to take a little break and re-evaluate after, see if you still feel that way.

thanks Starzzz I think I'm feeling stronger today!

Kudos to you, I couldn't do Freecycle. Even giving stuff away made my teeth itch a lot of the time, people are so rude. And the wanted ads - how you don't just hand out large fuck off tablets to the "I want this years large expensive electrical item of choice, and I deserve it because I am a student/ Mum/ other random tales of weirdness."

I think I would last maybe ten minutes.

Serious question: why can't you be, if not rude, at least a bit blunt or to the point. If people are being rude and are treating you badly they should be told.

As someone who has used Freecycle I am sure many of your regulars would be happy to see the back of the twats rude individuals who make it a less pleasant site for the majority.

I agree with what nancy said. I was really chuffed when our moderator commented on the fact that the greedy wanted ads were outnumbering the offers, and reminded them that the site encouraged people to make their first post an offer, however small. I sent her a thank you email!

On the first point, how about seeing if someone was willing write some illustrated user guides with pictures that you could email to people who repeatedly find it easier to get you to do their IT for them? I do this now when people demand help at work (just because I can use a computer doesn't make me obligated to drop what I am doing and find your lost cursor.)

Can't help with the second one, I am about the moderator running the ebay site - were you allowed to block them from the group altogether?

I still believe in Freecycle and thank you so very much for being willing to facilitate something so wonderful.

thanks for the kind replies - I think it's just volunteer fatigue like we all get from time to time.......

The worst for me, the very worst is "I asked you to change my settings yet I find that you have failed to do so" with that sort of peremptory tone, written as if I was a poorly performing secretary at risk of losing her job.

Actually, I suppose I could announce that I'm no longer going to help people change settings couldn't I? . no point in doing this if it's makign me resentful. It's just that some people are so baffled by the settings then overwhelmed by emails, and then so truly grateful that you want to make the offer.

I guess it's all about setting your limits isn't it? When you do more than you're happy to do, you get resentful/go martyry/burn out.

Thanks again for letting me vent!

good to read this.

I just got off freecycle after only a few days because I couldn't work out the settings at all: why are they so amazingly complicated?

well, at least I tried to get off, but kept getting my messages bounced back. and then I had days and weeks of being flooded with just the sort of weird 'my mum needs a new wardrobe with a big mirror because she's so fat cos she has a terrible disease etc etc.

I'm afraid I ended up writing please PLEASE stop your site sending me emails!

so yes, I'd give up, because the thing is so frustrating, or get the big freecyclers in the sky to write a better programme!!

Seriously tide? I've just looked at the settings page and it is really straightforward. Are all freecycle sites not the same?

There's even a big button that says "Leave Group", so I'm not sure why it would be a problem like you describe.

OP - yes, definitely stop being quite so helpful! Better to keep doing it, but let people fend for themselves a bit more, than stop doing it altogether.

ISITME: may be they're not then. Mine had an unsubscribe email addres sthat kept bouncing back. even considered emailing another freecycler to ask them to forawrd it for me...

tide - sounds like they must be different. Ours is much more simple than that - hence my surprise!

I love freecycle, as it has enabled me to get rid of loads of things that I couldn't bear to tip, but had no idea how to find somebody who wanted them. Particularly old electronics.