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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think there is no shame in taking anti depressants

48 replies

Reallytired · 15/01/2010 21:27

If some has clinical depression or any other kind of mental illness it is a reasonable option to take medication. It does not mean the person is weak. Taking medication is admitting that you have a problem. Often admitting a problem is the first step to solving it. Anti depressants are a valid option and should carry no stigma.

Using medication does not rule out other methods. Infact the use of medication can make things like CBT more effective.

I know someone with depression who is very proud that she not taking medication. I think she is misguided. Both her and baby are suffering unnecessarily.

OP posts:
tispity · 15/01/2010 22:13

Reallytired - i wish they didn't but they did discuss contraception in quite some detail and it was not considered taboo: 'i had a Coil fitted yesterday and i have already fallen in love with it' etc.

Reallytired · 15/01/2010 22:16

Declaring depression for insurance purposes is like declaring any other medical condition. Yes, it can raise your premium, but so can back problems or high blood pressure.

Most employers are interested in the number of days a potential employee has had off sick rather than the cause. As far as jobs go, I have only ever been asked my medical history when I have been offered a job. An employer would be on very dodgy ground for refusing to employ someone who is medically fit but has a history of depression.

In my experience anti depressants are not helpful for reactive depression.

OP posts:
NaccetyMac · 15/01/2010 22:22

Reallytired, I'm a teacher. I was told by the head not to mention the fact that I was struggling with depression and anxiety as "the staff will use it against you." So that helped.

Mermaidspam · 15/01/2010 22:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Reallytired · 15/01/2010 22:45

NaccetyMac,

Schools I work in are more interested in quality of teaching than anything else.

I suppose that schools like any other work place have their bigots.

OP posts:
PuddingPenguin · 16/01/2010 09:05

at your Mum Mermaid! But I had exactly the same reaction from my stepdad..."you're strong PP, you can't have PND, you're always so cheerful. C'mon now, sort yourself out." Arrrggghhh!

In trying to sort out my PND, I tried lots of ADs, mainly because originally I was still trying to BF which excluded lots of them. I do not think there is any shame in taking them whatsoever, but I did deliberate for over a fortnight about taking them even after I had the perscription, because I was scared of going down that road IKWIM.

Now, one year on, I think they helped get me out of the big black hole I'd fallen in. However, they are not the magic solution that so many people & GPs think they are. Some work for some people and some don't. Many have awful side effects and are very hard to come off. I think that much more research and better funding needs to be put into the area of mental health in general. The idea that depression is a chemical imbalance only occurs with some depressed people and if it was as simple as that, ADs would work within hours (as soon as the chemical imbalance was righted) rather than weeks or even months.

I wish it was as simple as taking ibruprofen for a headache or a cast for a broken leg. Unfortunately when you are depressed, you aren't in the best mental state to know what is best for you, which makes the decision even harder.

Anyone who admits to depression is brave. Taking ADs is a positive sign in that the individual clearly wants to get better, so in response to the OP, there is no shame in it at all. But it's not as simple as take ADs and everything's better as some people seem to think (not here, just generally).

PuddingPenguin · 16/01/2010 10:39

BTW, this is a wonderful article with the best descriptions of how depression really feels that I have ever found: www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/mental_health/article6925762.ece

And it has a 'joyful' ending...

jasper · 16/01/2010 10:49

prozac saved my life

belgo · 16/01/2010 10:58

puddingpenguin- I cannot open the link, can you post the link again please?

BadMutha · 16/01/2010 10:58

YANBU at all. I've been on Prozac on and off (mostly on) for the last 10 years and accept that it's just one of those things. If I was diabetic or if I had high blood-pressure I'd take meds for that, so why not depression. My kids have a mother who loves them dearly, and probably embarasses them mightily, but is at least there and not dead in a ditch (which was my plan before I got back onto the ADs last time...). My Dad struggled with depression for years before getting treatment in his late 40s and feels he missed out on so much in his life because of this. I got treated much earlier and am very glad of it.

Mermaidspam · 16/01/2010 23:13

PP - yep, had the "sort yourself out" line too

mummysgoingmad · 16/01/2010 23:36

YANBU - i been on them twice. The 1st time i honestly didnt realise i was depressed until i got it into my head to jump off a motorway footbridge. The 2nd time i saw the sign much more clearly and tried everything to keep off them exercise, st johns wart, doing things i enjoyed etc, alas it didnt work. I dont mind discussing this now as it in the past but at the time a was mortified that i had surcome to anti- depressants again! I think it was more the stigma attached to taking them, and i suppose the feeling that i had failed in tackling the problem myself.
But when i was on them i found it easier to tackle the problems that made me unhappy, and i felt like the storm that was going on in my head had ended. I would suggest taking them but only if every other option has been unsucessful.

fairycake123 · 16/01/2010 23:54

I'd be dead without them. I looked down on ADs for years and years, tried to treat my depression myself with yoga, exercise etc. What a complete fucking waste of time. I wish I'd asked for help years earlier than I did.

hogshead · 16/01/2010 23:55

I agree with CMOT - I always think along these lines .... if you had a broken leg you wouldn't think twice about having it put in plaster just as if you had intolerable pain you wouldn't think twice about taking pain relief. Managing the symptoms shouldn't have any shame attached to it but i do understand why people are vary of having such a diagnosis linked with their medical records with regards to life insurance etc because it does mean that more questions. You can never put a price on your health though be that physical, mental or emotional health.

ShinyAndNew · 16/01/2010 23:58

YANBU. Depression is a medical condition. Something to do with your body not producing enough of a certain hormone. No one knows why this can start happening. The ADs help your body start producing more of this hormone. Pretty much the same as Thyroid meds in that way and there is no shame in taking those.

Anyone can become depressed, It is not a sign of being weak, it is a medically recognised illness.

YanknCock · 17/01/2010 01:17

YANBU. I have recurrent major depression, and it took me years to accept the fact that I will most likely take ADs for the rest of my life. I do think they're given out too easily, and they're not for everyone, but for me they were a lifesaver. Getting on the right AD at the right dose is like a light bulb going on for me, I suddenly become 'myself' again. I can cope with whatever life throws at me. Without them, I will make my life shit even if nothing is wrong. I still have my 'blue' days, but I am functioning.

Anyone who thinks it is shameful for me to want to treat what is a chronic condition can seriously fuck right off. I don't advertise the fact that I take them, but I'm not going to hide it either. Most people who meet me for the first time would never guess, and that's down to me staying on my medication and remembering to take it every day. When people find out, inevitably I get, 'oh but you're so positive and cheerful'. I can only be like that on ADs, and I believe it's how I'm meant to be. If I wasn't on ADs, I wouldn't leave the house. I'd be a ball of depression, paranoia and anxiety.

PuddingPenguin · 17/01/2010 01:19

Trying that link again:

BTW, www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/lifeand_style/health/mentalhealth/article6925762.ece is a wonderful article with the best descriptions of how depression really feels that I have ever found.

And it has a 'joyful' ending...

Olifin · 17/01/2010 15:05

YANBU.

I have been struggling with PND/anxiety for over a year and have only just started taking ADs. My main issues are with anxiety and anger rather than depression but the drug I am taking (Citalopram) is helping enormously while I await a counselling/CBT appointment.

I resisted them for such a long time as I knew they would 'only' treat the symptoms and not the problem itself, but I wish I'd considered sooner, that treating the symptoms could make such a difference to my day-to-day life and above all, to my poor children who have suffered in all of this.

OrmRenewed · 17/01/2010 15:08

YANBU - I'd be in a terrible way if it wasn't for citalopram (and seroxat on previous occassions). There is no shame at all. I have come across people who would be horrified if they knew I was on them - wouldn't feel the same about antibiotics

SilveryMoon · 17/01/2010 15:19

I'm not ashamed.
I've been on prozac for about 9 months now, due to start weaning off them next month.
They have helped me function like a normal person.

DragonMamiHatesCooking · 17/01/2010 20:08

I found they evened me out to a point where I could then deal with the other stuff. More of a helping hand than a cure.

I've been depressed/anxious on and off for 16 years and know that it may well return again in the future. I recognise the signs now & have managed to head it off before it really got hold at least twice, but if I need them again in the future then I'll take them.

Diabetics can't produce insulin through willpower alone and it's ridiculous that people expect people with mental health conditions to be able to perform this medical miracle.

Doodleydoo · 17/01/2010 21:47

Ladies, for those of you who take AD's regularly and who discuss it I completely applaud you. There is NO shame in taking them, that outdated view is one of our parents generation that didn't talk about alcoholism, drugs, gambling, suicide or depression without whispering behind their hands like it was something to be ashamed of. Because of this people didn't get the help they needed and LOTS of families suffered and were outcasted or talked about behind their backs for no reason other than shame. Shame is relevant to those that whispered and not those that suffered.

I don't have as much experience personally as some of you but I was prescribed AD's and live in fear (because I felt so totally out of control) of it returning, however I am in a position to know that PND is a very real possibility at any point for me and hope that I could take action if I needed to without feeling some sort of stigma attached to it.

Claire2009 · 17/01/2010 21:58

"Prozac saved my life"

Same here, Jasper. I'm no longer on them, but when needed (for pnd/depression in itself)it truly did save me, and my two children. At times I do wonder if I should go back on them, I'm almost fighting it daily, do I or don't I, and I don't know what's stopping me.

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