to ask parents what *their* preferences are when buying presents for their dcs??

[LetThemEatCake]

am I?

I'm just conscious that people may have space issues/ not want duplicate stuff/ not like plastic/ not like certain brands.

So I always ask for guidance.

Is that weird? would you prefer people to do this with you or not?

I usually ask aswell. So no YANBU.

Of course you should ask what they want. It's a no brainer imo.

Depends. I might ask, but not think myself bound by my ideas. Sometimes it is nice to be given the kind of present your own parents would never have thought of. And I have always wanted my dcs to be exposed to a certain amount of outside influence. But space issues are worth considering.

You can ask if you want to. I don't because I prefer to use my initiative. I might check they haven't already got it.
It is up to the individual and no one should feel they have to do something.
Parents have to accept that they can't control everything!

yanbu.

I don't mind - in fact I was glad when people asked for DS's birthday as I was able to gently point out that much as he does love construction/science kits, he doesn't have much time to do them and had yet to work his way through the previous year's haul.

Unfortunately not many people did ask so DS's room now looks like the educational aisle of Toys R Us with 90% of the boxes still sealed

I wouldn't get anything big-but I don't spend that sort of money anyway.

Course yanbu.

YANBU

I don't buy big things either, so not a problem. But I don't necessarily want parents to tell me that 'no , little Kaylie won't want a car mat because she doesn't play with cars" (you've never given her a chance to find out what she likes), or "oh, he won't like that book, he's only into Star Trek" (he might change within the next year, for all you know). A little gentle pointing ("Joe really likes Dr Who") is great; control freakery is not.

I might ask what they like, I'll certainly ask what they already have. But I won't go around on tiptoe for fear of acidentally introducing them to something their parents hadn't already planned for them.

YANBU, my DSs party is coming up and I have had parents asking, as well as half the family. I assume some people will ask and some won't. I don't mind either way tbh. It is noce to have a few surprises but if we did get duplicates, I would hope that they wouldn't mind me taking it back and swapping it for something else.

Yanbu, I usually ask if there's anything they are particularly into.
If no suggestions then I get something 'disposable' like a decent paints and big drawing pads.

When anyone asks me I just say that they both love stuff for colouring glueing sticking and painting. That way they have tons of presents but everything is gone/used up after a while.