to ask for the money and not a cheque?

[Coldhands]

My MIL has asked what to get our DS for his birthday. After xmas I'm not sure so I'm thinking money, which she is fine with. The only 'problem' (I recognise that its not a real problem) is she asked if we would like a cheque (not money). I am only in favour of cheques if they are sent by post, just in case it goes missing etc. She will actually hand the card to us so AIBU if we ask for the money rather than a cheque, which would be a pain in the ass as I will have to actually go and pay the bloody thing in to the bank, which is a it of a hassle for me tbh (not great health).

you can pay it in by post

Can you? How? Just post it to the bank?

I think its cheeky as she may have the same problem as you and have to go to the bank to actually get the money.

I would think if it is sent by post rather than being handed to you in a card there is more chance of it going missing.

do you have a cheque book yourself? if so it should have some paying-in slips at the back. if not I think you should be able to pay it in if you send it with a quick letter giving the account name, number and sort code.

I do think it is a little cheeky.

I'm not sure what the problem is. She asked if you would like a cheque.

"No, thanks, just put his money in the card, thanks very much."

Maybe add "Would you like to come with us when he goes to spend it, we could have a coffee or some lunch?"

She will be handing me the card, not sending it by post, that was my point. I don't mind when it is arriving by post as like you said there is more chance of it going missing.

Could you not ask her to transfer the money into your account electronically via telephone or internet banking? That way, neither of you have to leave the house.

Heqet, possible could say that, although she likes to do things her way or not at all generally. Don't know when we are spending it though.

Not a bad idea Paolo, although she does work so getting the money out shouldn't really be a problem. I'll get my DH to ask her, if not, I'll just go to the bank at some point.

accept the cheque graciously - pay it in by post as someone else suggested. if there's a will there's a way...

I think you're being a bit ungrateful really

you can also pay in to many accounts in a post office. Just ask at the post office counter. I know I can pay in to Barclays and Lloyds. The p o keep special envelopes for this, provided you have a paying in slip in a cheque book or whatever; you can also phone and order your own envelopes to save the p o the bother. Easy.

Could you suggest a book token or something if you can't be bothered to cash the cheque. (Which I quite understand btw. I had to commit a teeny bit of fraud today by asking PILs to bank cheque that was written out to Mr & Mrs Twanky, when DH and I have different names. Too to ask Nana to re write it.)

Waterstones do a card token thingy, which my DD thinks is the height of cool. (She's only 7 though.)

You can get ipod vouchers everywhere too.

Cheques are a bit of a hassle compared to cash - YANBU to find it a pain. But it would be rude to ask. Couldn't your husband do it?

I am a bit wary of gift tokens as if the shop suddenly goes into administration/bust they're worthless.

I know it does seem cheeky really. I'll ask DH to ask and if she says no, I could try the post office thing, that is up the road so would be much easier.

Cranky good idea about ipod vouchers, but DS will be 2,

Fimble, never thought of that! Also I find you are restricted to buying in a certain shop then, which I don't mind if it something like Toys R Us, as they have loads of choice, but as much as I LOVE waterstones, their books are soooo expensive. I am cheap and shop around online for things like that. Although if I'm not paying for it I suppose it doesn't matter that much.