about issue of guardianship

[trixie123]

genuinely after opinions here - honestly don;t know if this would be a reasonable thing. DP and I are thinking about wills and guardianship of our DC if something happened to us. we each have a sibling with a partner. My sibling is not very maternal I think and we would prefer his sibling to have DC but her partner is Australian and I would want to know that they wouldn't take DC there to live until at least after my parents are gone (morbid, sorry). Is it unreasonable to make this a condition as it would bind them here for 20 years. They have mooted the idea of emigrating but its very up in the air. My parents could not travel that distance for various reasons and could not afford air fare for DC to visit them regularly either. opinions please..

I get the bit about emigrating, I don't get the bit how the sibling not being maternal but whose sibling would they prefer to have children?

The OP would prefer that her partner's sibling had her dcs.

Oh, I read it as the sibling having their own children, not looking after the Ops children in the event of their death.

Thanks.

Oh yes that wouldn't make sense!

It is same prob as we have, MIL is not best pleased about what we have done in the end. But it's not up to her, it's up to us to decide who we would like best as "replacements" and thus to choose people that we like a lot, and trust, have similar personalities and sense of humour etc.

No point giving them to someone we don't want to because they are first in line

I guess that is why this stuff needs to be sorted out in advance.

"The only other stipulations we've made are that we wouldn't want them to have their ears pierced before starting secondary school and would prefer it if they didn't have flute/violin lessons!"

Sorry to bump this up but just noticed that^. Were you serious about it? Why wouldn't you want your dc to have flute or violin lessons? Just curious.

Only slightly serious megapixels! I played clarinet and saxophone and always ended up sitting opposite flautists who pulled ridiculous, in pain, faces when tuning. My DH and I both had siblings who had violin lessons... enough said really!

It was part of a lengthy letter that explained some of our thoughts on things and words of wisdom that we hope to be around to pass on ourselves. We'd like them to grow up to be rounded individuals who are encouraged to do the best they can at whatever they try and if that's at the flute/violin then we're not going to come back to haunt them but we've told the would-be guardians about our favourite instruments so that, if the need arises and the question is asked, they'll be able to tell our daughters what our favourite instruments are/were