To think begging from people eating their lunch in a resturant is a step too far?

[dilemma456]

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sounds aggressive and intrusive: definitely a step too far

I have had this too, sitting down for a meal and a woman comes over and hands you a card and stands there whilst you read it.

Nobody in this country would have 3 children and be truely homeless. Chilcren would not be left on the streets to starve. However, she may be here illegally. In which case it's better that you report her and have the police / immigration called as at least then her children will be fed and given somewhere to stay.

I do often give people begging money or buy the big issue. The other day when it was so cold I felt sick going round the corner to Sainsburys there was a woman outside selling the big issue. She had a tiny baby (less than 3 months) in the buggy, wrapped up, but it must have been freezing. I didn't buy it from her as i thought having a baby there was a horrible attempt at making people feel bad for her and to buy a big issue out of guilt. As I said our welfare system ensures children do not go hungry, so there was no need for that baby to be there on such a frezzing, snowy day.

Dilemma what an awful thing to experience.

I agree with others about the fact that you were right to doubt her sincerity.

I hope you are very proud of your DD's selflessness - her actions are to be proud of.

We have spoken before on other threads - I am a wmidlander too - do you feel comfy letting me know where this happened?[nosy face]

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In Brussels there are many women with children begging. If you go to McD's they come in and go round with a cup. As far as I have been told they are "recruited" for this, and they don't get to keep the money given, it goes to the "Gang master". I don't give them money.

Before Xmas I was walking down the street and saw a woman in a doorway with a small baby. It was snowing quite heavily. My thought was that in the UK THAT would not be allowed. At least I don't think it would. I certainly hope not!

Agree that in the UK, a woman with small children would at least be given a roof. I don't understand what the rules are here, but i can't believe it is that different.

Thanks Dilemma I understand your reasoning.

Such a shame the staff have to deal with this repeatedly.

If I recall rightly (something I read somewhere), it is "acceptable" - i.e. legal for an adult to be homeless on the streets but not so a child, and thus any child who was on the streets and genuinely homeless would be taken into the care of Social Services.

If this is the case it sounds like the woman was trying to pull a fast one.

PS dilemma, your DD sounds like a darling and I'm sure you're so very proud of her for her compassion, which is a credit to you.

The thing about women and children being "recruited" is totally true. Cute kids and desperate looking women are more likly to get given money. It then almost all gets given to the gang "master".

A friend of mine once told me how he was in Sri Lanka and loads of these kids were begging for money. He knew they'd never get it, so it was pointless giving it to them so he took them all to a local icecream parlour and bought them all their fisrt icecream of their lives. He said they cost just a few pence each but it was such a nice sight to see them all eating them and it meant so much to them. Made me

Also bear in mind that the showing of card or passing round of a cup is often a diversionary tactic to get access to your wallet.

I have had this happen to me a couple of times and seen them go for my purse/bag and prevented it. I have friends who weren't so lucky.

Portofino It's not allowed in Belgium - she would've been entitled to care even if it was just that asylum seekers hostel on the banks of the canal. But you're quite right, she was probably working for a "gang master" and hoping she'll pull a few more heartstrings sat out there in the snow.

My experience of Belgium is that the beggars have become much more aggressive since I first arrived in 99.

skihorse think it is the same everywhere sadly.

Ten years ago I think being approached directly was quite unusual. Now a regualr occurance.

We were in the UK a week ago, my dh gave some money to a woman who showed him a card stating she was deaf and mute. Was he conned?
I've seen an increase in begging where we live in central Switzerland. My dd is very at one who just sits with a cup looking pathetic. Her take on it is that he should entertain her.

I've seen the "deaf and mute" cards in Belgium before and afaik it's a legitimate enterprise. They'll come to your table in a cafe and leave a lighter/small game or something with you and the card. It's your choice as to whether you buy the item or not. I find that quite inoffensive.

Skihorse, this happened in the UK not in foreign parts. He is a soft touch though so if you want a couple of quid you know where to find us.

kreecher Yes, I saw you said it happened in the UK - I'm just not sure whether it's a legitimate thing which extends all over Europe - or, simply just another scam.

But if you're handing out free money...

My friend is a tube driver and he was told by the NSPCC to try and persuade people on his tubes not to give to people begging with children as a large proportion of these children are kept drugged so they are docile.

There used to be a woman who begged in the stairs of our tube and her child must have been about 2. I never saw him anything but slumped asleep in her arms - even at various times of the day.
I just didn't know what to do. To give money is going to perpetuated them being kept in cold, dark miserable conditions. not to feels so heartless.

It's tricky isn't it. We lived in Bangkok for four years and saw the beggers being bussed in by gang masters. Most of them (or at least a lot) were from Cambodia or Laos. It was really tricky to know whether to give them money or not, in general I bought them a sandwich or sausage. One woman I remember very clearly was constantly breast feeding her child. It took me nearly 8 months to work out it wasn't the same baby every day
Mr kree would give away his arse and shit through his ribs. He is a lovely chap but a tiny bit naive.

kreecher I have seen things like that in Bangkok and in India - very sad indeed.

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Was it a laminated card?

YANBU and your dd sounds lovely.

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There is no need to beg in London, other than to fuel addiction. I don't give anything.